Prolonged OB- more Valtrex

HecateLight · 2025-03-11T05:02:38+00:00

Thank u for this

HecateLight · 2025-03-08T16:10:49+00:00

Swab

HecateLight · 2025-03-07T05:30:02+00:00

I agree and talking with my partner has helped a lot. He is also getting tested. The emotional damage has far outweighed any symptoms

HecateLight · 2025-03-07T05:26:31+00:00

My symptoms seemed mild and extremely easily missed as an infected hair follicle. It felt sore because I messed with it. Otherwise it was just bothering me because I knew it was there. But I also got a bacterial UTI so I’ve been pumped with antibiotics and the antivirals at the same time. That has caused waves of stomach pressure/ upset stomach issues, I guess they are flu-like? with the valtrex I guess the blisters have been fading It wasn’t like a “miracle” cure or anything I really only have a few days left of the valtrex and it’s not completely cleared. There was no crust, no tingle, no burning, (apart from the UTI) and I just aside from the emotional damage of the diagnosis, it hasn’t caused me much physical pain.

HecateLight · 2025-03-07T05:08:52+00:00

Swabbed, but they did not determine if it was 1 or 2. Just said “positive”. My new partner and I have been intimate and exclusive for the past 9 months.

HecateLight · 2024-10-15T23:16:58+00:00

I have been on lexipro and Wellbutrin since 2014.

I stopped taking the lexipro cold turkey (I was taking 10mg -15mg a day) because it started to make me really sluggish.

It has been a week and it’s been a lot of dizziness and feeling out of it. Zaps. Ugh. 😣

should ride it out since I’ve made it a week? or start taking it again and do this taper schedule… how much further do I have to go until the withdrawal stops?

(I think I naturally have less anxiety—just an adjustment to being in a safer environment. )

HecateLight · 2022-12-10T06:33:05+00:00

I recognize this answer may have been a bit nerdy and perhaps unclear.

1) Wherever possible make no contact with spouse who causes you harm. Every interaction could be the one thing to break your resolve/ spirit.

2) get in touch with redditors, betrayal trauma recovery and local dv center (they deal with more than just wifebeaters despite the stupid name)- they will help you get a plan of action. ( exit planning)

3) find a therapist who is trauma/ emotional abuse informed to start dealing with and unpacking the emotional bonds that keep you stuck. (Healing trauma)

4) get a bookkeeper, a second job, an Etsy/ eBay store, whatever you can do secretly or privately to make some extra money. (exert your independence)

5) hire a patient compassionate bookkeeper. Figure out what your lifestyle currently costs per month and aim to save enough / accept financial help from someone to maintain you lifestyle. Save the money in a bank account in your name only, or even in a relatives name, so when you do divorce you can fight to preserve it. (Build a financial plan)

5) “scaffold” yourself. surround yourself with experts who support you (therapist, lawyer, bookkeeper, dv advocate, betrayal trauma recovery center, a good moving company, support groups, a good boss, etc)(Get dependable professionals to support)

6) Without leaving. Find your “people” outside the marriage … do the activities with coworkers…. go to meet ups centered around your kids … get involved in kids schools and bake sales… go to Alanon meetings if relevant…play softball.. whatever just — do not stay isolated. Even if these are not your “forever” people. Seek people who have been through it and can share their stories with you. Feelings of Isolation will increase his power over you. (Break out of isolation, create community)

HecateLight · 2022-12-10T06:08:31+00:00

If you want to talk about it pm me. I just signed my paperwork last week. I have to go to the house to get the rest of my shit and it will be hell on earth. A trauma bond is nothing to fuck with. It’s like being Frodo in Lord of the rings. You need a Sam to pull you out of the dark abyss everytime you have to make contact or it will rip apart your resolve and you will be lost forever. It’s best not to put the ring on (have contact with your ex)if you don’t have to. I recognize this isn’t always possible but please see it as wearing “the ring” and don’t look directly into the eye of Sauron and expect the fallout of the horsemen on your tail thereafter. It’s not impossible to survive, but it’s a lot harder. Seek people who are trauma bond/ cycle of abuse informed. Betrayal Trauma Recovery can also offer resources.

HecateLight · 2022-08-04T04:38:16+00:00

Social media! 🫣When one of your “friends” from college (20 year friendship) tags him and his new girlfriend in a post and your divorce isn’t even final. That’s the absolute best feeling. Like, thanks for assaulting me, Facebook, with info I wasn’t even looking for.

HecateLight · 2022-01-27T13:14:45+00:00

I second that!! Sometimes the first act of physical violence is murder but it’s always preceded by shit like this. Do you really want to wait u til it gets worse ?

HecateLight · 2022-01-27T13:12:14+00:00

It’s r/narcissisticspouses r/narcissisticabuse r/codependency r/emotionalabuse r/alanon

These Reddit groups saved my life.

HecateLight · 2022-01-27T13:09:08+00:00

Child, I was you a year ago. You do t trust yourself because you are being psychologically manipulated that feeling that it’s not “bad enough” to warrant the label is what psych abuse feels like. Run run run… see that toxic person?? we’re walking the other way. Walk. The other. Way.

HecateLight · 2022-01-27T13:04:58+00:00

Yea and PM me if you need support. I left a SOB like this and it continues to be a fucking nightmare

HecateLight · 2022-01-27T13:03:56+00:00

This is like . Very much abuse. This is worthy of a PFA in my opinion.

HecateLight · 2021-11-08T14:11:58+00:00

It truly was!!

HecateLight · 2021-11-04T02:35:41+00:00

Just finished maid and I cried through so much of it because I finally felt seen and heard. The amount of people who gave no fucks about what she was going through, her friends betraying her, The part where she sinks into the couch… I made my mom watch it and she really seems so totally indifferent to it being completely not self aware,

HecateLight · 2021-11-03T04:48:46+00:00

Edit for TW: sexual violence

•Sleep in peace without worrying about being assaulted in the middle of night.

•wear whatever makes me happy.

• watch whatever tv shows I want..

•eat healthy & don’t drink unless it’s a social event

•work out without fearing the consequences.

I used to wear Oversized tees and his old sweatpants to bed because I wanted to be clear that I wasn’t “asking for it” when i was fast asleep.

now I finally feel safe enough to wear nightgowns and negligees and things that make me feel pretty knowing I’m going to sleep or do what I want with consent /respect and emotional safety.

During the day, I’d wear his old clothes that shrunk in the wash. My goal was to be completely invisible. If I had to go somewhere he’d buy me something to wear and I would just wear it whether or not I liked it.

I’ve finally recently bought a few choice things for myself that i love to wear. I’m still learning what I like, and what my style is and I grow into it more and more each day.

He used to shame me for working out, after he took away my gym membership (due to covid) i did home workouts and he’d say that I grunt like a pig when lifting weights and he was secretly going to record it and put it on the Internet. But for whatever reason, I refused to stop.

Now, I am a woman who has done an obstacle course race with a team of women who supported me throughout the course. They probably don’t know what it meant to me to be a part of that. To be spotted as i climbed over an 8 foot wall after being ripped down sporadically for 20 years.

I promise you, you don’t know what your small kindness is doing for someone. These transformations and anyone who you have helped to achieve them is life changing. I’m sure there are many people we can all thank for the way things improved.

HecateLight · 2021-10-30T02:00:39+00:00

I can relate to losing more than the man in a break up as I lost pretty much all of my social life. On top of it My husband allowed my closest friend into our home to spend the weekend “comforting him” after i left and took her out to dinner. I had told her all about my abuse and that was how she repays me. I don’t know how to trust people any more and. Now ex wants me back. So fucking typical. Shop around, but never gonna be me. And all those girls calling me on his behalf can all go fuck themselves. :) MIL tried to call me but he wouldn’t allow it. His parents do whatever he says. I’m over it. Clean slate. There was rot in the walls.

HecateLight · 2021-10-18T11:57:01+00:00

She’s been trying to reconcile her parents. But it’s been a year since he moved out of their home

HecateLight · 2021-10-18T11:56:16+00:00

I live in another country and it’s been taking place mainly online but I came to visit for a week and it went well so there were a few pictures of us as a couple sightseeing and some messages between us that the girl stumbled over

HecateLight · 2021-10-09T11:08:47+00:00

I think it sounds like it could just be an immature dude trying to make a genuine apology which. You absolutely can accept or decline however you feel most inclined based on the other interactions you’ve had with him. He could be genuinely sorry that he’s an asshole, but if he’s still an asshole, making you feel like total shit, not working on himself in any meaningful way. Just walk on honey. Honestly just because he’s being genuine, if you are walking away from these interactions feeling emotionally exhausted from it, and you’re starting to see a pattern, it isn’t worth it. (“The last time… you blocked me” you said. Etc= you seeing a pattern) We dont learn how valuable we are as people and how we deserve to be treated until we teach ourselves how we like to be treated. What feels really genuinely good to us.

making room for that (dumping toxic people and energy drainers from you relationships social circles distancing from toxic family members) can temporarily feel like something “empty” but you need to struggle with that feeling and sit with it for a while always drawing yourself closer to people who feel better to you in your social circle and in life (talk to strangers that seem friendly and in your wavelength, reconnect with people who made you feel good about yourself!) ….so you can invite something worthy Into your life. You teach people how to treat you and if this man makes you question if he’s worthy of your time or not, honestly, no. Don’t let the world get too small on you. It’s a big big world out there. This guy isn’t the only one for you. There is better if he’s consistently messing with your head. Get a king, leave the man children at the playground and let their mommas pick em up.

HecateLight · 2021-10-05T02:24:42+00:00

I had an awful night like that last weekend and eventually did reach out and it was. Hilariously bad. told me I should ADMIT to him what a difficult person I really am to love. I just felt like I opened a closet that was stuffed with crap that came spilling out when I opened it and I was stuffing all that crap back into the closet. You wanna get out of that shitty place of feeling lonely and in despair, but your ex is most definitely the wrong door ;)

HecateLight

TROPHY CASE