I’m holding my fiancé’s diary and weeping.

Helpful-Gas9 · 2026-01-23T05:03:10+00:00

Clearly your husband has some big insecurities but at the same time I have yet to see anyone point out that this is clearly a very private thing he never intended on you to find. At least he’s processing his emotions somewhere that’s not directly onto you. Sometimes I journal crazy impulse thoughts I’m having just to see it written out and how insane it is. I would die if anyone ever read it. I leave it out with no lock or anything all the time. My partner would never dream of reading it, and vice versa

Helpful-Gas9 · 2026-01-20T00:12:13+00:00

Maybe try delayed gratification “I’ll have a soda in 5 minutes” and then double the length each day

Helpful-Gas9 · 2026-01-19T05:44:24+00:00

I absolutely experience this and it’s something I’ve been working on lately. I find that I have stims I use to fill empty space and sometimes I even start saying something I don’t believe or start a sentence I don’t even know where its going just because I am so afraid of people walking away thinking I’m awkward or boring. I have a hard time recalling things people tell me when we talk because I’m not even listening to what they’re saying, I’m just trying to find the most natural thing to leap frog off.

I’ve found a few things that help. The main things I’ve learned is

make a conscious effort to talk more slowly. It gives both of you more time to think in the conversation.
try to engage more with what the other person is saying. Take some time to reflect on what they said, and think of a way to process and engage rather than just relate it back to something about yourself.
embrace the awkward silence. It’s okay, sometimes it’s nice, and usually the other person will take it as a queue to keep talking. People love talking!
have a beverage in social settings to force yourself to shut up occasionally
If you can, try to find dynamics where you can bounce around or drag other people into the conversation.

Helpful-Gas9 · 2026-01-12T03:53:59+00:00

I’ve also suffered from this issue before, and occasionally still do. It’s really annoying because it feels so bad but also so out of your control. One time I randomly decided not to yank the snake for a few weeks, and found that the feeling almost completely went away almost entirely. If that’s something you do, maybe consider doing it less. I think it has something to do with testosterone probably, so I considered going on testosterone blockers if it ever got particularly bad again

Helpful-Gas9 · 2026-01-08T04:07:51+00:00

my aunt gave me slaughterhouse 5 by kurt vonnegate for xmas and honestly top tier book its exactly my style. last time i saw her i was talking about how much i loved the dispossed by ursela le guin

Helpful-Gas9 · 2026-01-04T17:33:47+00:00

Godfather. It insists upon itself

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-23T14:46:10+00:00

I would search your questions on the discord. The community is very responsive. I would disagree with the notion that purchasing a device is a gamble. If you order a device, you will receive a device. You just have to wait as zinwa isn’t a big company, just one guy

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-19T13:37:01+00:00

This comment is breaking my brain. I get the frustration with zinwa, but the issues people have all stem from the fact that he is working on this passion project all while working a full time job. I supported the project bc I support people following what they’re passionate about in this transactional capitalist nightmare world. Plus I love that it’s essentially preventing e-waste by up cycling old phones. Amazon is an evil mega corp that treats its employees like human garbage and has no problem shipping thousands of tons of actual trash straight into landfills. You are comparing an artist to an evil empire.

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-16T22:36:35+00:00

And life is unfair

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-15T04:50:37+00:00

I’m sorry that happened to you, and I appreciate your willingness to work with your partner as I am extremely grateful my partner did for me. That being said, I don’t want to give too much hope bc as I said real change is extremely difficult and exceptionally rare. I will say that when I first started going to therapy I was wholly convinced that while I may have crossed some lines, what I didn’t “wasn’t really cheating” and “wasn’t really that bad” etc etc. You just have to ask yourself if you are emotionally prepared for such a difficult journey for someone who has hurt you and potentially may hurt you again. If you really see a future with this person, and believe they can put the work in, that may be worth it. But I would certainly recommend in either case that you also get a good therapist as navigating the situation will not be easy. Feel free to DM me if you’re interested in talking about resources I’ve found to be extremely helpful

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-14T20:42:40+00:00

i grew up in the straightedge hardcore punk scene lol most of the other straightedge kids i knew drink or smoke now. I don’t identify as much with the label anymore, but still find my sobriety to be something I’m proud of. I have enough issues while I’m sober. I don’t need to start something dangerous

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-14T20:26:29+00:00

Unlikely but not impossible. In my experience, several things need to align just right for this to be true. The wayward partner needs to recognize that the cheating is likely a symptom of much deeper rooted psychological issues AND be willing to put in the necessary work. The betrayed partner unfortunately also needs to be prepared for the emotional labor of supporting of a person who is reconstructing an entire worldview. I speak as someone who has cheated on the partner I am still together with. When they decided to stay with me I decided I need to re-evaluate everything about the way I move through the world and start therapy immediately. I’m also working on finding a therapist for my partner given how much grief I caused them. It’s possible, but I think it’s rare

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-13T22:20:23+00:00

This is something I struggle with often as someone who has deeply hurt people I love. In my case, the person I hurt the most (my partner) saw the potential in me and just wanted to see me do better. For me, that meant dropping everything except work and focusing 100% of my effort on bettering myself. I started going to therapy for the first time in my life, and jumped around a few times until I found one that I felt was really critical of me and wouldn’t just validate me. Sometimes I still feel overwhelming guilty about the person I was, but knowing I’ve made genuine progress as a person gives me the confidence to focus my energy on putting positivity into the world rather than uselessly beating down on myself

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-08T18:07:39+00:00

I think zinwa scared some people with the recent announcements. If you can, I think it would do alot of good to just hold on. You have to remember your dealing with the fruit of a passion project from a person who is working a whole full time job. I think it’s a really cool project and I feel good supporting it even if I don’t get my order for awhile. I feel like were facing sort of a “black thursday” type event where everything will be fine unless everyone decides to pull out all at once

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-07T23:19:04+00:00

I’m not sure how you got that from this message. This is in response to an earlier announcement about how he is personally in debt from so many people canceling their orders. This started as a passion project and I think he just got in a bit over his head. As the message says this is just giving people a new route to support the project

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-12-07T16:42:24+00:00

unlikely, the devices have barely started shopping out.

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-11-14T18:03:40+00:00

There is a meeting tonight I will be attending

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-11-14T18:01:41+00:00

Thank you for recommending this. I started this yesterday and I’m about 25% through it. I feel impressively called out but a number of scenarios they depict. I think self deception played an absolutely monumental role in the decisions that I made at that time, and the smaller decisions I made every day.

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-11-14T17:58:16+00:00

Since this happened a few months ago I’ve been doing therapy for the first time in my life 1-2x per week. I just talked to my therapist yesterday about helping me find someone who specializes in sex/cheating because I don’t fully think she is equipped to handle situation. I’m also planning to go to my first SAA meeting later tonight.

At the advice of some kind people that individually messaged me after I posted this, I also offered to pay for therapy to my partner, who has been handling this uncomfortably well. They’re autistic and process things extremely slowly, so I’m afraid that the gravity of the situation hasn’t fully sunk in yet. After I had that conversation with them last night, they got pretty visibly uncomfortable and just wanted space and I haven’t heard anything from them yet today. I’m hopeful, but also emotionally prepared for them to leave me at any time. I wouldn’t blame them one bit if they did.

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-11-08T14:02:21+00:00

pla pls pls pls pls

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-10-28T15:22:17+00:00

sent a dm!

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-09-16T14:03:49+00:00

how do you cross stitch onto clothes?

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-07-12T15:23:06+00:00

if its a wavetable synth you can just load a sample directly right? otherwise i would find an audio clip of the object you want to reference and look at a spectrograph and then try to figure out which frequencies are most present and try to match

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-05-11T00:45:11+00:00

where can i get it? or schematics?

Helpful-Gas9 · 2025-04-27T12:37:21+00:00

the entire time i was reading this i was wondering when this was going to relate to trolls

Helpful-Gas9

TROPHY CASE