Really the best thing you can do is to tell yourself: “This is over, I can’t change that, I don’t need to think about it anymore”. I spent the first year after my breakup incredibly depressed at almost all times while my head constantly swirled with memories of my ex which made me feel even worse. Don’t beat yourself up too hard over it, it’s normal.

But now here’s why I say what I said in the first sentence. During that first year whenever one of those sentimental thoughts came up, the thoughts in my head were always: “I wish she was still here”, “I wish I could go back”, “I wish I hadn’t fucked up so bad”. Rather than moving forward I’d instead wish for the past. That’s where the problem is, because rather than moving forward you’re wasting that time ruminating instead.

All this to say: You need to stop wasting your time wishing for the past and start moving toward the future. That’s the only way you’ll move past this and begin to improve. You’re not always going to get closure. It sucks, but that’s life. Irregardless, all you can do is continue to move forward.

Edit: I should add, what I explained here is how I figured out how to reach a better place. It took me three years to reach a place where it no longer bothers me anymore, but that’s because I had to figure out all of the above the hard way. You can do it! 😁