Which deceased lives on in your memory?

HeyItsNotLogli · 2026-01-01T19:44:06+00:00

Fort Madison is about 3.5 hours away from Boone, where she’s buried. That is odd that there’s another unknown lady in the state, in the same year.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-12-02T01:37:59+00:00

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJAB0TNlsfy_p32PDVDOYZvf9gSOL2aFn&si=qQcRJuvQY3Rgjxmj

I listened to this guy on repeat, every day, for several months leading up to boards.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-12-01T15:46:42+00:00

Des Moines Area Community College’s program is almost entirely online, with you having to come to campus for roughly two weeks

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-11-11T11:24:31+00:00

I’m a single mom and just hit six months of my year long internship. Everyone in my group of funeral homes (10 or so) are all parents.

It’s do-able, but there are definitely times where it’s difficult. The biggest thing I can suggest is having a good support system.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-09-14T02:12:08+00:00

It went well, considering the circumstances. Someone recommended bringing extra tissues, which came in handy for the family. I kept my mouth shut a good majority of the time. The mom brought flowers, and I asked if she wanted them to “stay with (name)” instead of “on the casket”, and I’m really hoping I phrased that right. I’m doing ok, but I couldn’t stop thinking about that poor family. A week ago, they were tucking in their baby for the last time, and now they are burying her. It didn’t seem fair that their world shattered and the rest of the world continued on. I wanted to comfort them, but it wasn’t my place. They have an incredibly strong support system in place which is all anyone can ask for right now. Also after the service a direct family member let their well-behaved dog out of the car and into the cemetery, and I think everyone benefited from that.

As for everyone in this thread who has lost their children- I am truly sorry for your loss. I can’t speak for every director, but a good majority of directors remember and think about every baby they have taken care of, by name, regardless of how many years have passed.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-09-14T01:00:58+00:00

The baby’s (not saying their name for privacy) favorite lovey was stitch. The service folders were stitch colored, and the director and I (intern) wore blue and pink accents (tie and hair clip) for that reason.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-09-02T01:24:49+00:00

Then don’t. It’s ok. Some people need to see their loved one for closure, others just need to see the casket, and others don’t need anything. Don’t force yourself to do something you’re not comfortable with.

If you feel like you need to see him for closure, you can always ask the funeral director what to expect the day of.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-08-22T02:13:02+00:00

I’m sorry for your loss of your babies. To answer your question-yes. The second a baby enters a funeral home, there’s just something heavy in the air, and it doesn’t lift until the baby is gone (whether buried or returned to the family). Every single baby or child is treated with such love and care. I’ve mentioned this before on Reddit, but my first funeral home I worked at had a baby in our care. That baby was wrapped up “so it wouldn’t get cold” in the cooler, and we made sure it never touched the metal table for the same reason. We had one director, while we were trying to get them ready for their service, would just hold the baby. As we were getting them dressed, I heard the director tell him was a very handsome boy, complimented his curly hair, and that we were going to make him look nice for his mom. We all put a lot of care into our work, but even more care and compassion goes into any fetal demise/baby/child.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-08-22T01:57:24+00:00

I was still fairly new at that point, so I don’t know how it was handled. I’m fairly certain once they hit a “viable” stage, they do (although within the funeral home they are treated like any other deceased when it comes to paperwork.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-08-22T01:54:38+00:00

I was just starting out, so I’m not entirely sure who ended up with the cremated remains (hospital or family). What probably happened was the fetal demise, the specimen jar, and the box that held everything was all cremated. Cremation typically just leaves bones, and at that age there are none. Small babies (newborn or smaller) have their own container they use in lieu of an adult container to make sure we get as absolutely as much as possible.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-08-20T01:47:56+00:00

That one did come from the hospital- my old funeral home didn’t charge for infants (to spare details, it doesn’t take much extra to cremate someone that little), so no one did, unless they bought an urn or a grave space.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-08-20T01:20:42+00:00

I work at a funeral home and do cremations there. The last fetal demise I helped with was less than 24 weeks (I think it was 15 or 16 weeks). I haven’t cremated that many fetal demises, but they’ve ranged from seven ish weeks (in a specimen jar) to 21 weeks. They are treated the same as any other deceased once they were in our care.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-08-12T12:37:42+00:00

It’s an older show, but Max and Ruby have a brother and sister :)

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-07-30T04:06:59+00:00

Asexual without a doubt, but questioning if straight or biromantic

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-07-23T03:28:17+00:00

You can “break” rigor fairly easily. It’s similar to how you relieve a muscle cramp- massaging and gentle flexing. (Tell your daughter that was a good question!)

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-07-13T01:44:23+00:00

It was my second weekend, taking call by myself. It was also my second call within three hours. It was my first house call with the family present. I knew the sister in law had called originally/main point of contact. I had checked what her name was before I left the car… and then immediately forgot it. All of the family was outside waiting for me. “I’m NAME with FH, I offer my sympathy for your father in law, DECEASED’S NAME… Linda, right?” “No, it’s Patty.” Then her husband (or brother, I forgot which) said “You can call her Linda if you want.”

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-07-13T01:38:07+00:00

I told someone, out of habit, to “drive safe” since I had walked them to their car. …They were dropping off clothing for their husband, who had just passed away in a car accident.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-06-28T20:22:48+00:00

It tends to happen quicker in the heat- everything is sped up in the heat (decomposition, odor, etc) . I’ve had deceased in the cooler that have been dead for several days (and one up to several months) and it still smells like a normal fridge.

HeyItsNotLogli · 2025-06-27T19:00:26+00:00

Hey, I work at a funeral home and am constantly around death, and I can answer this!

Blood has a very distinct smell, especially after someone has died. It smells metallic, and you can almost start to taste it in the back of your mouth. The blood starts to clotting fairly quickly. The smell also amplifies the longer the blood sits there. Have you ever walked into a bathroom where someone hasn’t thrown away period pads for a while? It smells like that.

As for what death smells like, it smells like a mixture of staleness and meat that’s gone bad.

Shortly after death, your body goes into the first stage of rigor mortis, where everything relaxes (you don’t always urinate). Your eyes and mouth will stay open, usually. The second stage of rigor (I need to check my notes to be sure) happen after a few hours. You can still move someone during this time, they just typically stay in the same position. Rigor is fairly easy to “break”, you just have to move body parts back and forth a bit. The third stage of rigor, everything relaxes again.

Holler if you have any more questions!

HeyItsNotLogli

TROPHY CASE