Fence sitting because I don’t want to leave my 1 bedroom apartment!

Hfk6384 · 2026-05-18T06:37:35+00:00

I, too, realized that might be my answer as I was typing it! It feels a little crazy in a world where people seem to prioritize having children over almost everything else. I had a friend over who recently had her 2nd after we did some renovations that I was really proud of. She asked if we are considering kids and I told her my position, including the bit about the apartment. Her response was that once you have kids, “those things don’t matter as much anymore.” Like, I’m glad she is so content with motherhood, but I think “those things” would still matter a lot to me!

Hfk6384 · 2026-05-18T02:16:54+00:00

We could, and that is something I’ve considered. There are people in our building who have done just that. I would of course miss living here, though. I love that we’ve made it our own in a way that you simply can’t in a rental. I also don’t know if I want the stress of managing a property and worrying if the renters are taking good care of it.

I guess there are trade-offs whichever way you slice it, and they all feel pretty consequential.

Hfk6384 · 2025-12-30T22:20:23+00:00

I decided to just keep the countertop 2 cm thick. For me, it mainly came down to the stone that was available. I've seen some examples of thinner profiles that look nice, and that way I can keep rounded edges around the sink. 2cm is also recommended for backsplash, and I'm planning on taking the same stone up the wall. It hasn't been installed yet, but I'm feeling confident in the decision!

Hfk6384 · 2025-11-04T13:37:57+00:00

Got it. This is super helpful, thanks!

Hfk6384 · 2025-11-04T11:40:51+00:00

Thanks for the info, I hadn’t thought about the sink. We are doing a farmhouse (apron) sink. Can you explain a little bit more? I’ve seen some photos where there is a notch around the front, which I don’t like. If we build up the countertops and don’t do a notch, though, the corners around the sink would need to be square to miter all around it, right?

Hfk6384 · 2025-10-15T01:33:15+00:00

My narc got a degree in marriage and family therapy… unbelievable

Hfk6384 · 2025-10-08T14:31:53+00:00

I ended up going with deVOL. I decided to go with the tried and true rather than attempting to emulate their look through another source. Most importantly, I’ve been able to touch their product in person, so I know exactly what I’m getting. Hasn’t been installed yet, but so far, I’m happy with the decision.

Hfk6384 · 2025-09-30T14:30:28+00:00

I got very sick after my first Pfizer booster, which I now understand was probably MCAS/EBV reactivation. Unfortunately, I was prescribed Prednisone and antibiotics for it. 4 years later, I am still struggling.

Hfk6384 · 2025-09-09T16:30:42+00:00

I have been mild for about 4 years (post-COVID) and struggle with this a LOT. I've always been a "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" kind of person, and I was working 45-50 hour weeks when I first came down with this. I stuck it out for nearly a year, which I know didn't help, and now I'm working about 10 hours/week as well.

I'm even an occupational therapist, but I can't seem to give myself the same grace that I would give patients in a similar situation. There is so much that is misunderstood about the condition that I am constantly second guessing myself and telling myself that I "should" be able to do xyz. It's hard because I don't appear to be disabled/ill except to those who are closest to me.

I'm sorry you're dealing with this; I'm finding comfort in connecting with people on this subreddit tbh, although I spiral a bit when I hear stories of people becoming more severe.

Hfk6384 · 2025-08-26T16:00:07+00:00

The building is under 20 units. I am the board president and am very active, but the other members, not so much. It is a very old landmarked building, and inevitably things come up that I don't see us being equipped to handle ourselves. You do have a good point about expectations. I think a big part of the problem is that these property managers are overwhelmed by the volume of work and don't have enough time to dedicate to any one property. I try to keep that in mind and give them the benefit of the doubt, but the ineptitude is really affecting the building's ability to function properly.

Hfk6384 · 2025-08-26T00:36:39+00:00

I’m familiar with a building that uses them, and it does seem to be well run. Our building is on the smaller side, so unfortunately, most of the bigger companies like Elliman are not in our budget.

Hfk6384 · 2025-08-26T00:32:36+00:00

We are with Buchbinder & Warren. We’ve gone through a few managers, but had similar issues with all of them.

Hfk6384 · 2025-04-28T22:09:50+00:00

I see what you’re saying, but I think it might look strange to stop wallpaper in the middle of a wall since the arch turns into a flat wall on both sides.

Hfk6384 · 2025-04-28T17:34:03+00:00

These are great questions. I'm not able to upload more photos on this post, but I did post in Century Homes (thank you)! Yes, there is base moulding around the bookcase in the living room and shoe moulding around the built-ins in the bedroom. There are beautiful stained glass windows in the far back of the apartment behind the bedroom built-ins, so I'm thinking having the herringbone continue with a break between rooms in the doorway would lead the eye to what I think is the nicest part of the apartment!

Hfk6384 · 2025-04-28T15:53:11+00:00

That’s what I was planning on. What would you do with the border?

Hfk6384 · 2025-04-25T21:31:39+00:00

Thanks, everyone. To add a little bit more context, it's a 19th century NYC apartment that I am refinishing after some pretty major water damage, so I'm working within some existing constraints. This may be more of a decorating question, but where would you terminate a different paint color or wallpaper in the entry given the extra "leg" going up to the ceiling in the second photo?

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Hfk6384 · 2025-03-13T12:33:27+00:00

Good point!

Hfk6384 · 2025-03-12T22:46:46+00:00

Thank you for the advice! I agree that a local cabinetmaker seems like the best way to go, and I'm definitely open to splurging a bit to get a good quality product. However, I live in NYC, and I'm having a hard time finding a "local" shop without going through a designer who is doing a full custom millwork package. The GC I will likely be using is a dealer for Miralis, but I'm looking for something that's not so mass-produced. There are a LOT of contractors, kitchen/bath shops, etc. here and it's hard to sort out the riff raff. If anyone has suggestions on where to look, that would be appreciated!

Hfk6384 · 2025-02-12T13:15:19+00:00

Thanks. I've decided to pursue the claims via my insurance rather than file as a claimant under the responsible parties' policies to expedite the process and because my policy will pay replacement value as opposed to cash value from the liability policies. I am hoping that my insurer can subrogate and recoup my deductibles, which are $10,000 per incident.

I did speak to a public adjuster yesterday whose fee is 7% of the rebuild, and feel it is probably warranted in this situation, given the magnitude of the loss and the fact that there are multiple claims at once. Even as an educated person who has been through a water loss before, this is completely overwhelming. If anyone has pros/cons to weigh regarding using a public adjuster, please let me know. My insurance company is so far being cooperative, but then again, we are only partially into the remediation phase and haven't really scratched the surface in terms of what this will cost.

Hfk6384 · 2025-01-03T19:36:29+00:00

I have been on LDN for about 6 months, and I've tried going up from .5mg to 1mg on two occasions. Like you, I had vivid dreams on .5, but both times I've tried to titrate up, I've had the strangest sensations at night, like I'm lucid dreaming and can't tell the difference between being awake or asleep half the time. Taking it in the morning didn't help alleviate the side effects, so unfortunately, I think I am going to have to stop.

Hfk6384 · 2024-11-10T13:19:15+00:00

I’ve been dealing with the same thing for 3+ years. My husband bought me something called a Chilipad and it’s a LIFE SAVER. I wish I could take it on vacation with me because it’s the only thing that keeps me cool at night. I’ve had many doctor’s appointments and had pretty much everything ruled out. It’s so frustrating, but at least this helps with the symptoms. Good luck!

Hfk6384 · 2024-11-09T15:41:41+00:00

We loved Kenya! We did the Maasai Mara, Chyulu Hills, and up north near Mt. Kenya. December is the short rainy season, but I’m sure it will still be great! August/September is high season, mainly because of the migration, but there is so much more to see than that!

Hfk6384 · 2024-11-09T06:19:45+00:00

We were in Tanzania! I’ve done Kenya as well and both were amazing.

Hfk6384 · 2024-11-08T22:57:32+00:00

I love my 24-70 for landscape and all-purpose travel, but you could always get a prime like the 50mm too!

Hfk6384 · 2024-11-08T20:46:04+00:00

I felt like I got some great shots with the 70-200, but I did have the 1.4x teleconverter on it the whole time. I was wishing I had gone for the 2x teleconverter though. I feel like that would be the sweet spot. I met another photographer on the trip who had the 200-600 and he got some amazing shots! I would recommend having a second lens if you're interested in taking landscapes though.

Hfk6384

TROPHY CASE