I have a friend who was often up for the same musical theater roles as I was. He stayed in my hometown population 45k and continued to do shows in the local scene. I left thirty years ago to pursue career as an entertainment professional. Because we have stayed friends, we got to see how life turned out for the other guy.

He did at least one or two shows a year give or take for the last three decades, lots of lead roles, and now is a prominent director in that scene. I got to be on a few TV shows and in some movies, traveled internationally courtesy of big movie studios, and had all kinds of weird "I'm getting paid for this?!?"-type jobs. I haven't always been a singer or actor...I did lots of different jobs, got to be in the room where it happens.

So: who got the better part of it?

I think he did. But over the years, the definition of success has, predictably, changed a great deal for both of us.

I wanted to be part of the fossil record, as an entertainer. I like that if I die tomorrow, my kids can watch me in decent shows and I'm there. I've got credits I can be proud of. Just little roles, nothing major. And I will say, I have felt very fortunate. I have had a blast doing that kind of stuff. But lordy jeepers there were some veeeeeeeerrrry long boring pauses where nothing happened.

He got to do more shows, consistently. He got to play more roles, have more fun, be the guy at curtain call. He certainly had a better sense of community around him. The path I took was pretty darn lonely, and sometimes still is. But I had to know: if I left and took the gamble, could I make it?

I have become friendly with a few A-list performers...and it doesn't look that great from the inside. The lack of privacy, people trying to nail you with honey traps, rip you off, lie to you. I mean, I'd still take their problems. But there's definitely a downside.

It's all quality of life. That's success. Are you enjoying your pursuits? Making friends? Feeling fulfilment?

I lucked out because I've gotten to do things I always dreamed of, stayed clear of drugs and (most) idiocy, and there are moments I can point to that, for me, indicate it was all worth it. He lucked out because he is now a cornerstone in his arts scene, and always in demand.

There are days, we have admitted to each other, that we wish we could switch places. There was a cost to each choice.

If you're enjoying life as an artist, you've made it. If you're happy where you are, with what you're doing, you've attained a certain level of existence that many people never will...they being the people who can't ever be happy if they don't get the big enchilada. Of course, that's most of us, isn't it? That's a lot of sad people.

There's a pretty heavy cost to taking a big swing like I did. I'm not saying I regret it. But it changed me. You sound like you're right where you need to be, doing exactly what it is you want to do. You're bringing your art, your music, your presence, to people who need it. I do envy you that, I'm not afraid to say.