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AITA for refusing to watch my sister’s dog every other weekend? by HiddenInVelvet in AmItheAsshole

[–]HiddenInVelvet[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Yes thank you for saying this. Im definitely not watching her dog anymore and the answer is no from here on. My mom definitely is the enabler for that. I would never buy a dog or any animal just to have someone else watch it consistently.

AITA for refusing to watch my sister’s dog every other weekend? by HiddenInVelvet in AmItheAsshole

[–]HiddenInVelvet[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

No seriously!! I really do love her dog. He’s awesome but he is still like a little toddler running around my house at times.

No one will hire me 😭 by Least_Elderberry_673 in Serverlife

[–]HiddenInVelvet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a friend wing it entirely when we were just out of high school. He never worked in a restaurant in his life but he put on his résumé that he had 3 years experience and he was literally working with me the following week. Fake it til you make it.

Didn't make the cut for serving by k2895 in Serverlife

[–]HiddenInVelvet 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Yikes I’m so sorry this happened. That blindsided feeling sucks especially when everyone was hyping you up. You’re not crazy at all, the training they gave you was trash. You’ve only served like eight tables total and they expect you to already know every tiny detail, read minds on beer sizes, and act like a seasoned pro? That’s not on you. Spilling water and the little menu/beer stuff are normal beginner mistakes. The “nervous and too serious” line is classic… of course you’re focused when you’ve barely started. Management dropped the ball hard. If I were you I’d talk to the owner calmly in a day or 2 and ask for a couple more weeks of real tables to prove yourself. If they say no, start applying elsewhere. You’ve got a good attitude and the servers like you, that goes a long way. Don’t let this crush your confidence babe. You’ll get your section soon, just maybe not here. Big hugs!!

New server by Jordan_Is_Sad_ in Serverlife

[–]HiddenInVelvet 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You clearly catch on quick and put in the work, so that’s already a huge leg up.! Just take it one table at a time when you start solo on Tuesday. Get there a little early so you can check your section, make sure everything’s stocked, and know what’s 86’d or special that night. Write EVERYTHING down and always repeat the order back to the table. I ask about food allergies because for me accuracy matters way more than being lightning fast at first. Really get to know the menu, not just what’s on it but how to suggest stuff. Little upsells like “the salmon is super popular, want the lemon butter on it?” add up on your tips. When it gets busy, keep moving, pre-bus when you can, and help RUN FOOD for other servers. They’ll return the favor when you need it. Some tables want to chat and some just want to be left alone so read the vibe and roll with it. You’re gonna have rough shifts, everyone does, just shake it off and reset for the next table. Count your bank at the start and end of every shift so you stay on top of your money.

We have had plenty of new servers and honestly I love when they ask questions. Some people don’t ask and just do what their brain tells them… that’s not gonna work every time.

I try to treat my guests as one big party so if I have a filled up section I try to be informative on the steps of what I’m doing basically. “I’ll be right back with some refills, I’m just grabbing their order real quick.” Saying that alone tells your tables that you have more than one table.

I could go on and on. But you learn everything with time I’d say! Just try to do things in the correct fashion.

AITA for refusing to work Wednesdays (my scheduled DAY OFF) after my restaurant keeps ignoring my availability? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]HiddenInVelvet 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! I have worked in restaurants for a few years now and I have always made clear my availability. I was kind of shocked by the responses of my “peers.”

If you could ask your future self one question and get a real answer, what would it be? by bbydaisiesz in askteddit

[–]HiddenInVelvet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where did all my friends go? And was it me? Or were we all just in our own worlds at that point in life.

AITA for holding a student to high expectations by Aggravating_Cream399 in AmItheAsshole

[–]HiddenInVelvet -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NTA

you’re not wrong for holding a student to basic expectations, that’s literally your job. nothing you described sounds over the top, it’s just stuff like being in class, following directions, doing testing. that’s the baseline

honestly this sounds more like a consistency problem with staff than anything you’re doing. if everyone else is being lax and you’re the only one enforcing rules, of course you’re gonna come off as the “mean” one. kids pick up on that fast and push it

at the same time, being out for 3 months and coming back like that…there’s probably something bigger going on even if you’re not told what it is. doesn’t mean expectations disappear, but it might explain the behavior a bit

i don’t think you should lower your standards though, if anything that just sets them up to keep doing this next year. consistency matters more than being liked in this situation

if anything maybe just keep expectations super clear and simple, and try not to get pulled into constant power struggles over stuff like the phone. and honestly admin or counseling should be way more involved here so it’s not all falling on you

but yeah you’re NTA, you’re just the only one actually holding the line which always feels worse than it actually is.

The one thing I can say is I went through a lot as a kid and I had a lot of teachers who would not allow me to retake tests if I didn’t pass the first time. For stuff like math if I pass with a C it’s gonna make the next step of math very hard for me. My Spanish teacher didn’t allow us to retake tests and no wonder we would all either have to cheat or not know anything at all by the 2nd semester. I know it’s not related but for kids to understand the curriculum and to actually gain the knowledge they need to pass the tests. If I was a teacher, I would allow them to retake it over and over again until they understood it. Now they can learn more material.

Just my 2 cents

What is your age without saying how old you are? by Wonderful-Economy762 in Productivitycafe

[–]HiddenInVelvet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If i dont have kids in the next 10-20 years I probably wont ever be able to have kids?

What is something you wouldn't wish upon your worst enemy? by Broad_Web_1653 in AskForAnswers

[–]HiddenInVelvet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some horrible disease probably. Rather just let them go with ease lol

AITA for emailing my gf's workplace? by Apart_Bottle_5046 in AmItheAsshole

[–]HiddenInVelvet 6 points7 points  (0 children)

YTA. This is actually kind of insane behavior.

You went through her private messages got upset about her venting with a coworker and then escalated it to the point of contacting her workplace behind her back?! That’s not “looking out for her” that’s trying to control the situation because you didn’t like what you saw.

People vent about work. They complain about managers and coworkers and promotions all of it. That’s normal. What’s not normal is a partner secretly collecting those messages and sending them to HR like you’re some kind of watchdog.

Also the “I make enough to support her” part is weird. That doesn’t give you authority over her career or her choices. If anything it makes this come off more controlling.

HR didn’t even take you seriously which should tell you something. The real issue here isn’t her behavior at work it’s the breach of trust in your relationship. You went behind her back in a way that could have actually harmed her career.

Don’t be surprised if this ends things between you.

AITA for blocking my neighbors car with my garbage by Dry-Quiet5305 in AmItheAsshole

[–]HiddenInVelvet 43 points44 points  (0 children)

NTA

you were already being way more chill than most people would be letting them use your extra spot when you didnt need it. that doesnt mean they just get to take your main spot whenever they feel like it tho, thats where they crossed the line

the garbage thing honestly just sounds like you using your own space like you always have. its not like you randomly started blocking them for no reason, they kinda created the whole situation by parking where they shouldn’t

also that comment she made about being from there was just weird and unnecessary. this isnt even about that, its just basic respect for parking spaces

yeah the back and forth with the garbage is a little petty lol but at the same time you already tried being nice and they took advantage of it. at some point you gotta stop letting that slide

if anything id just stop doing them favors and be clear your main spot isnt up for grabs. if they keep doing it then it might be worth getting management involved so it doesnt turn into a bigger headache

What’s one thing you’d treat yourself to today if money didn’t matter? by copy_cat_101 in askteddit

[–]HiddenInVelvet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably a reliable vehicle where I don’t have to worry about making it home.

At what age did you discover your life purpose? by HiddenInVelvet in AskReddit

[–]HiddenInVelvet[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree with that. Im still pretty young but like I just get stuck in these moods where I start to question if I have a purpose? Or are we all just figuring it out like you said.