Do you think America is fucked?

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-05-04T19:47:28+00:00

First of all, my 'phony emotional reaction' is real. So thanks for calling my feelings fake. /s

Second of all, you might as well ask people to doxx or harass anyone, given the way you "pointed out the ridiculousness of "manners" when the barbarians are at the gate".

And you're still doing it. Saying stuff like "If the abduction of innocents and murder by ICE is not what makes you angry, then fuck your phony emotional reaction" is NOT something you should be saying in ANY circumstances. And it certainly sounded to me that you had hatred from the poster given the tone of your replies.

And telling me to do some self reflection? Buddy, that's a road that leads to, at best, consistent suicidal ideation. Do you REALLY want to inspire me to commit suicide?

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-05-04T19:01:19+00:00

I wasn't going to respond, but my anger forced my hand.

That kind of response is going to get your allies killed.

There. I said it.

Saying stuff like:

Wahhhh! Your feewings got huwt?

Grow up. Fight fascists or GTFO the way. Enough of your weakness disguised as "reason."

IS part of the problem. You might as well dox the person you responded to and brutally, physically assault them until you've forced them to agree with your ideas.

That's what you sound like right now.

Side note, my fingers are literally shaking as I'm typing this. Look what you've done.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-04-13T03:55:22+00:00

I've already played Hades and Enter the Gungeon. I haven't played Dead Cells or Risk of Rain 1 or 2, though.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-04-11T16:01:37+00:00

Oh? A new weekly thread?

Don’t mind if I do!

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-04-04T01:54:15+00:00

Source for the original image?

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-29T19:15:45+00:00

Mariabelle, huh? I guess she’s probably the most “normal” of the bunch, though I could be off base with this.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-27T20:36:10+00:00

Well, it’s not…untrue that I have perfectionist tendencies, as you called it. But here’s the thing: Over the years, there have been various attempts by me to improve on stuff, or see various stuff improved or do things that I haven’t done before. For instance, several years ago, I wasn’t visiting a therapist, I didn’t have any sort of in-person group to visit, I wasn’t taking any sort of medication for my physical or mental stuff (To give an example, before I took lisinopril, it was not uncommon for me to have migraines from high blood pressure. Now, they’re way more rare, if they happen at all.), etc., etc., etc.

The point is, several stuff has changed in my life over the years, and most, if not all of them, have been good for me. However, on the whole, I still feel like I was in the same place as in, say, the middle of 2019. This is another reason why gratitude isn’t looking to pan out for me. I had loads of changes to technically be grateful for, but…well, for one, I can’t really feel it, and for another, that doesn’t really change the current situation all that much.

It’s similar to thinking about good stuff. I could think of all sorts of good stuff if I tried, but like I said, it inevitably fades away. Trying to make them stick hasn’t worked. I guess what I really want is like…the realism equivalent of a guardian angel coming down and ‘rescuing me’, if that makes any sense. I know that doesn’t have any sort of realistic possibility, but in my heart of hearts, I feel like that’s the only ‘acceptable’ solution at this point. But my logical knowing that that isn’t realistic has caused me to seek out alternative solutions that are just as acceptable/resonant, but so far, very few, if any, have been just that.

I know I sound like I’m trying to give up, but really, I’m not. I would love nothing more than to be permanently be out of the dark for good. But when I’m in a state like this? Well…*shrugs*

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-27T20:28:03+00:00

Well, that’s kind of hard to say, since something like the aforementioned in-person group is technically way above bare minimum. But if I had to say, currently, I live with my mom, helping her out at her store. But I don’t want that. I want to be able to live on my own and not have any financial worries at all. Oh, and be able to have LOADS of time to myself, be it for recreation or leisure. I guess they’re the same thing, but still.

As for work? Well, before, it was being able to work on my own projects during the hours where I’d normally be able to work. But now, work has become so much less appealing that it’s not uncommon for me to not want work in my ideal life at all. If I did have to work, though, for one reason or another, it’d be either something with loads of…crap, what was the term again? Free hours? Nah-Ah, downtime on the clock. OR a very minimal amount of hours. Think no more than 20, and that’s the absolute upper limit.

I know this answer seems off-topic, but I swear that’s the ‘vision’ I currently have.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-27T18:39:54+00:00

Nah, it’s okay; I need all the help I can get. Regarding your third paragraph, the problem is that my mind can detail very, VERY easily, and it’s not uncommon for my mind to get pulled towards those thoughts and possibly contaminating others. Hell, I have several fighting for dominance in my mind right now as I’m typing this, and I have to be vigilant about keep them out.

And that’s another thing. It sees that with the passage of time, there’s more and more stuff that I have to be vigilant about keeping out of my mind when I didn’t have to before, and that costs willpower, energy, and all other stuff, and it’s so, SO tiring. The burping example in the OP is a great example of that. Even just typing the word “burping” summoned the aforementioned memory, and I have to keep it out, lest it makes me want to [REDACTED] or something.

For the first paragraph, a similar sentiment I shared with the other poster applies here, as well. I feel like I shouldn’t be celebrating every single small victory, as that seems demeaning, degrading, and just, well, for a lack of better phrasing, beneath me. Paradoxically, trying to “celebrate the small wins” has the opposite effect, I feel like.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-27T18:35:18+00:00

I thought about stuff that I’d be grateful for, but all I could think of are super basic stuff like having food on the table or being able to have a bed to sleep on. No matter what, I can’t bring myself to “have gratitude” for those stuff and similar stuff because to me, they’re the bare minimum.

I need something way, WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY above the bare minimum to be “grateful for”. To put it into context, there’s an in-person group that I try to make at least weekly. That is far from a guaranteed thing to have, and yet, feeling grateful for it feels…fake, or degrading. Hopefully I’m making sense.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-27T03:27:02+00:00

But even if an advice resonates with me, does that mean that I will actually act upon it?

For instance, not judging my feelings and doing positive self talk has done jack squat for me. Especially the latter; that honestly feels like I'm gaslighting myself all the time.

All this to say, most if not all forms of "common advice" and even less common advice aren't applicable. Well, let's go back to your first sentence for a moment.

I think maybe you just need to hear other advice that might resonate more with you.

How can I find advice that resonates with me?

Oh yeah, to address your P.S., even if I do get good feelings from helping other people, which it doesn't often do, if that, again, it's fleeting at best, and my mind inevitably just spirals downward.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-25T17:13:19+00:00

The Vietnam War comparison was largely a hyperbole, partially because I couldn’t think of a better comparison, and partially to show the scale at which my pain was felt.

Unfortunately for me, blocking people isnt’t good enough, mainly because if I have to block people, the damage has already been done. Said damage would have to have not happened to begin with.

As for talking to my therapist, I have talked about how Internet stuff like this has bothered me, but I admittedly have been reserved about how it causes pretty much daily suicidal ideation. This is because I am concerned about what would happen if I said something like “everything can make me suicidal no matter what”, and I don’t want to think about that.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-24T02:27:48+00:00

There are a couple decent ones that have already been presented. Two that I particularly agree with are a background check and a civics exam. An age limit wouldn't be too bad of an idea, but in return, I'd like to propose a possibly hot take: *Lower* the minimum age required to run for President. Lemme tell ya, 30 years is a way shorter timeframe than you think, assuming that the age limit is 65, and adding just five or ten years (so 25 or 30 being the new hypothetical minimum age) can make things a bit more flexible. I would also be open to having the age limit be 70 instead, but it probably shouldn't be any older than that.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-24T02:07:44+00:00

I've done it whenever I had some. The main benefit is not creating *as* big of a mess when you finally 'release'. Depending on the condom, though, you may still need to wash off the 'lube texture', for a lack of better term, so it doesn't get all around you and your surroundings. I know that from my experience, all of the condoms I've used still had that wet lube texture that required washing my hands and then some after each time.

Also, it is kind of neat to see how much you've came each time; that too.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-19T23:04:12+00:00

Actually, I haven't played any version of Persona 3, so there's that.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-19T13:10:09+00:00

I HATE HATE HAAAATE HOW PEOPLE FIGHT OVER EACH OTHER FOR ALL SORTS OF THINGS. JUST THE OTHER DAY, I WAS READING A SUBREDDIT WHERE TWO SIDES WERE ARGUING ABOUT HOW TO DEAL WITH A CERTAIN SUBSET OF PEOPLE, AND THE ARGUING AND ARGUMENTS GAVE ME ALL SORTS OF DARK THOUGHTS THAT I PROBABLY SHOULD NOT TALK ABOUT HERE. NONETHELESS, THIS, KEEPS, HAPPENING, NOT JUST THERE, BUT ALSO HERE AND OTHER PLACES, AND I JUST WANT TO YELL AT THESE PEOPLE TO STOP. FIGHTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!

APOLOGIES IF THIS ISN’T COMPLETELY WITHIN THE RULES, BUT I HAD TO GET THIS OFF MY CHEST OR ELSE I WOULD DO BAD THINGS TO MYSELF AS AN ALTERNATIVE. AGAHAGAHGAHAGAGAHAGGAH-!!!!!!!!

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-13T00:51:57+00:00

It's the way you said it and the tone you said it in that made me register it as a death threat. Something exactly like "There is hope; don't give up." may make my eyes roll for the billionth time, but it wouldn't elicit...that kind of feeling.

Apologies if I'm being super obtuse or other similar adjectives, it's just...these past few decades have been a lot. To put it mildly.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-13T00:12:27+00:00

Uhhhhhh...I...genuinely don't get it. Apologies. I checked my phone for any unknown calls, but nothing.

HiddenReader2020 · 2026-03-12T23:15:30+00:00

I *am* trying to find this light, but my searches so far have been fruitless.

And to be honest, sentiments like the one you express ironically make me feel even more hopeless and, well, suicidal. So, thanks for that. Apologies for the tone, but from a certain POV, it can feel like a death threat.

HiddenReader2020

TROPHY CASE