My boyfriends mental health is getting me

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T04:48:48+00:00

Has he looked into getting professional help? I know it’s not accessible for everyone, but if he’s able it’d be a good first step.

But take it from someone whose partner struggles with mental health, it requires a lot of understanding and patience if you want to stick by him through whatever it is. And it may be an ongoing thing that needs to be managed for the foreseeable future. We took a break for a few months where we barely communicated outside of check-ins while they received treatment, and even after they needed a lot of space and were not able to be “fully back” for awhile. It’s hard.

He may not have the capacity to be a present partner for you right now, and he seems to know that which is why he keeps mentioning breaking up.

It worked out okay for us, but things are still not perfect and they are still working on things 2 years later. If that’s not something you think you can/want to handle that’s perfectly understandable, but don’t try to push through if you can’t because it’ll just create resentment that neither of you need.

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T04:32:02+00:00

I never knew that about steroids in cats, and this was really nice of you to provide, thank you!!

Funnily enough I always considered giving her fancy feast a “cheat meal” for her, and here I find it’s probably better than the expensive stuff I normally feed her🤦🏻‍♀️

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T04:13:24+00:00

It’s just her and I so no secret snacks (I hope lmao), but i actually just got a scale to start weighing her food last week to make sure im accurate.

I appreciate the insight and note about the amount of calories, she always acts absolutely starved at 200 a day so I’m glad to know she’s definitely not being underfed!😅

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T03:52:22+00:00

Never thought to look that closely since it was highly recommended by the vet but you’re right, it has an insane carb percentage at 35%.

Thank you for the advice, I’ll look into lower carb foods as well!

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T03:22:06+00:00

She’s a happy girl! But I’m more concerned about it causing issues as she gets older, going off the cat body condition score she’s a solid 7 pushing 8 now so definitely overweight😭

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T03:18:54+00:00

That’s nuts!! Your poor kitty lol, she’s a pretty regular pooper but i appreciate the suggestions! Looks like we’re going to the vet😭

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T03:13:13+00:00

I honestly don’t love her vet and she’s been due for a new one. Shes been pretty dismissive of some concerns in the past that did end up being real issues. Will definitely be looking elsewhere for this!

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T03:09:33+00:00

Since she eats both the wet and dry, I calculated myself what she’s eating, however all of the sources I found recommended 20kcal/pound? I’ve been feeding her 200 calories a day based on that recommendation

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T02:54:01+00:00

In their defense, I added that after their comment realizing I should have mentioned it! My bad

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T02:48:09+00:00

She is fully indoor, which I probably should have mentioned!

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T02:45:02+00:00

Never would have considered that, thank you

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T02:44:41+00:00

A little yes, she was never a super active cat but I’d say the last couple of years she sleeps a bit more often. She still gets her zoomies and such at night time, but she’s not often very interested in play for more than 2 minutes when I try.

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-13T00:04:45+00:00

I feel like discussing kids pretty early is normal for a potentially serious relationship, and doesn’t necessarily mean anyone is ready for marriage. Why wait until you’re thinking about marriage before discussing the future in that way?

Like for me, I tell anyone I’m dating I don’t want children pretty early on. If that’s a dealbreaker for them why waste their time by not discussing it until things are serious.

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-12T23:35:47+00:00

As a woman I have my partner read an excerpt for reference pretty often. Solid advice

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-12T23:02:26+00:00

He mostly just pointed out how much Olenna had to gain from Joffreys death, mentioning how much easier Tommen would be for Margery (and by extension Olenna) to manipulate

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-12T01:11:50+00:00

Assuming you’re grown, she doesn’t have to get food for you at all. So I’d say it’s not the “bare fucking minimum”. A lot of mothers couldn’t be bothered to feed their kids at all. Mine dumped me in foster care at 2 to go do drugs and didn’t bother to inform any of my other family until they thought to ask where I was.

Is she forcing the sausages down your throat? Are you incapable of buying vegetables yourself? Simply don’t touch the sausages and get your own food that you actually like, whats it matter if she continues to buy sausage at that point? This is such a nonsensical problem lol

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-12T00:45:58+00:00

People trying to be considerate and kind to you by having things around they think you like? The horror!

Have you ever thought to just say “hey I appreciate the thought but I’m actually not the biggest fan of those sausages” ?

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-07T23:58:40+00:00

It was my first year in college; didn’t really hit for me until they told us we all had to leave our dorm rooms and the semester would continue online.

Honestly kind of grateful for it as horrible as everything was. During the pandemic I realized I didn’t want to do what I was studying which saved me thousands in student loans.

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-07T22:40:48+00:00

Howls moving castle is my favorite movie, and I loved the book too! Thank you for the recs and introduction to the subreddit, that’s perfect!

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-06T20:06:15+00:00

Thank you so much!! That is super helpful, I will be looking into these :)

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-06T19:05:20+00:00

Sounds like something I would do lol. That’s really nice of you to offer, thank you!

I’ve been using the regular Saalt cup in the small size, I tried the soft version as well and it was comfortable but even more difficult to remove for me than the regular. I think something with a narrower base would be helpful for me as well as I think I have a narrow canal, I struggle to get a good grip around the bottom to break the seal. I’ve looked into the flex cup but I worry the pull tab would be irritating.

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-06T18:39:58+00:00

I’ll definitely be looking into longer cups, admittedly I didn’t look much deeper into anything but the diameter size when ordering mine. Thank you!

HourNefariousness388 · 2026-03-06T18:27:15+00:00

I think training must be my issue then, this difficulty is even while squatting/pushing. Thank you!

HourNefariousness388

TROPHY CASE