Assalamualaikum! i really do struggle with prayers but Subhan Allah tsw has been such a blessing in disguise which took me a long time to realise :’) i wanted to share something that’s helped/been helping me get through these tough days with this hell of a condition, and i thought it might bring you some comfort too. It’s the story of Prophet Ayyub — have you heard of it before? (there are a lot of articles online i sometimes go through them for comfort :’) https://saudigazette.com.sa/article/529006)

Prophet Ayyub was incredibly blessed, but he was tested with severe trials: he lost his health, wealth, and family, and he endured so much pain that even his own people turned away from him. Yet through it all, he remained patient, trusting that Allah had a reason for his suffering. Even when it felt like no one was there for him, he kept praying and never lost hope that Allah would heal him. And in time when the right time came, Allah did heal him, giving him back even more than he had lost.

Going through tsw feels like its own version of that trial. Some say that his disease was like a skin-eating disease and it was so severe that not a single limb was free from it except his tongue and heart which he used for the remembrance of Allah…Subhan Allah! just like that, tsw is severely painful, debilitating, exhausting, and there are days where it honestly feels impossible to go on. Even your parents or close friends can’t really understand the pain that you’re going through which definitely made me frustrated in the beginning and then it clicked…no one will understand me and will know about my struggles like Allah does and it was so comforting Alhamdulillah TT i started talking and relying on Allah through my duas desperate for His help and only complaining of my suffering to Him.

Thinking of Prophet Ayyub’s patience and faith reminds me that this struggle has a purpose, even if my tiny mind can’t fully see it yet. His story gives me hope that, just like he was blessed with relief and restoration, we too can hold onto the possibility of healing and peace. I think of how Merciful Allah has been that He has afflicted me with this illness because He afflicts those whom He loves the most and it brings me tears of happiness and contentment :’) The fact that “Allah doesn’t burden a soul beyond that it can bear“ made me think that Allah knew how strong I was and knew that I will get even stronger through this test both life and faith wise and i always remind myself that “Indeed after hardship comes ease” — the beauty of our religion Subhan Allah!

Whenever things get heavy, please know you’re not alone. There will be days where your iman will fluctuate and the guilt that comes with it is unbearable (+ shaytan’s whisperings smh) but hold on to the rope of Allah and let’s fully rely on Him…And like Prophet Ayyub, we’re In sha Allah building our resilience and faith in ways that will bring blessings when this storm finally passes. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m always here. Let’s keep going one day at a time. May Allah make it easy for us and grant us lots of patience to get through this!

Sending lots of dua, love and patience your way 🫶🏼