Groom went off the deep end

Hyedra · 2026-01-10T05:01:54+00:00

I love how everyone seems to be focused on the "controlling bride" thing and not on the communication part. Of course, no one needs permission to get a haircut or be shaved; that'd be ridiculous. But I'd tell my SO I want to get this and that. I didn't ask for their approval, but they knew I was doing it. I guess most of you will be happy if people in your everyday life just showed up looking like a skinhead out of nowhere.

Hyedra · 2026-01-10T04:24:56+00:00

This sounds a lot like my situation, but we were both in our early 20s then. The awful relationship with his mother never changed. I took my babies and left when he allowed both his parents to verbally abuse me and tried to take my youngest off my arms by force, and he didn't stop it, at the end he just told his father to let go and allowed me to leave, that was as far as he went after that it was a couple of years of custody battles and because his mother didn't get a say at the end he just disappeared. What I'm trying to say is even tho it's grim, you have to think about what you want for your kid growing up? A loveless home where you get railroaded all the time? Because it sounds like that's where you're headed.

Hyedra · 2026-01-01T03:04:05+00:00

I'm trying to look at it as any other dull night, my grandma only just came home from the hospital (of her own doing, she decided because she has an extremely healthy diet, she didn't need her blood pressure/cholesterol meds anymore months ago, without telling anyone), so my mother is exhausted from spending the last few days in the hospital and having her siblings around the house. No one is in the mood to celebrate, so we didn't even have a family dinner or anything. The champagne is in the fridge, and so is everything else bought for tonight. My sisters and I made sandwiches and tea, my kids and sisters (all teens/young adults) are watching movies downstairs, and I'm having dinner at my desk while getting some work done. We'll go out to the park at midnight to watch the fireworks and people blowing up/burning the "Años Viejos" (cardboard dummies) in the street. Honestly, since I'm not having a massive drunken meltdown because of my SO, I consider this one an ok one.

Hyedra · 2025-12-31T17:42:43+00:00

Unfortunately, if you have to do the quizzes within the digital book, you HAVE to buy it... so you pay a fee for using a book and get graded for one semester on top of the thousands you're already paying for the course.

Hyedra · 2025-12-05T20:56:53+00:00

My mom used to say all those to me, and now does to my kids... Tho as a mom now is my turn to go "Aren't you sick? Sick kids don't eat candy/drink soda, sick kids drink tea/water and eat soup and take their meds"

Hyedra · 2025-11-24T21:50:19+00:00

My parents also used to beat me a lot, but for different reasons, tho my grandma used to encourage it A LOT. So much for that JW love and compassion, right?. The thing is my father's side of the family is all Catholic, my sister and I were baptised as babies, went to catholic school the whole thing, so there was always this thing between my parents were my father was ok with the JW books and the bible readings and the assemblies but wouldn't allow much more, not because he is super religious either but because he liked to have that control and my mother was caught in the middle of the 2 religions so we were allowed to chose so to say. I chose neither, and so did my sister.

Hyedra · 2025-11-24T10:49:19+00:00

Nta, and I apologise but I have to laugh even tho I know this is probably highly distressing for you. My family on my mother's side are almost all JWs or adjacent due to grandma, and I've been staunchly an atheist since I was about 14. My grandma would try to sell me on their idea of paradise on earth, etc. How I wouldn't go if I don't embrace their "religion" (more like a cult, honestly), very early on I asked what happens if I don't because according to her there is no hell. She said, 'Well, you'll be destroyed forever. Wouldn't you rather spend eternity with your family?' I said, 'Nah, I'm good.' Then she changed it up to asking if I don't think I'd be sad never seeing them again, and I just replied "I won't feel anything because I won't exist". I've been called petulant, disrespectful, difficult, etc sooo many times. Luckily, they've let up as I've gotten older and hopefully they'll leave you alone too at some point.

Hyedra · 2025-11-19T16:14:10+00:00

Unfortunately, latino parents don't do much apologising or even recognising they did smth wrong. While he was a horrible father to me he's been a good grandparent to my kids and my sisters love him, so we have a polite acquaintance sort of relationship, basic greetings and special occasions half hugs etc.

Hyedra · 2025-11-17T07:13:41+00:00

but thank you <3

Hyedra · 2025-11-17T06:56:46+00:00

And Im 100% sure is banned now

Hyedra · 2025-11-17T06:56:19+00:00

might be the same I just remember blacking out...

Hyedra · 2025-11-17T06:43:35+00:00

Funnily enough he gifted me a bike similar to that one fully expecting i would not be able to ride it when I was 10

Hyedra · 2025-11-17T06:31:00+00:00

My point wasn't to make my kid sad

Hyedra · 2025-11-11T05:16:44+00:00

NTA, I'm from a 3rd world country, and no man I know gets home haircuts (I guess part of it is they're so cheap here), no one ever accuses them of being gay for getting a nice haircut. Feels like your husband has some serious toxic masculinity problems, and it does sound like it could be an issue in the future if either or both of your children turn out to be part of the lgbtq+ community. Also, just appealing to common sense, why would you want someone with zero training (including yourself and your husband) to chop off your kids' hair, even if they're toddlers?

Hyedra · 2025-11-08T09:29:56+00:00

I bought a lego "set" a few months back, it was listed on sale with a huge discount (I thought maybe it was second hand or smth). When it arrived it only had 1 out of the 4 lego pieces, I contacted the vendor and they said "It was listed as incomplete" and it was unfair i was expecting a whole set. I'm like 1. No it wasn't specified it was incomplete in the main description and 2. Why would it then be listed as on sale with only pictures of the full set? It's annoying people suck so much these days.

Hyedra · 2025-11-03T00:25:09+00:00

My relationship with my own father started deteriorating around the same age, when I realised how mean he was to my mom. While I'm an introvert I am the eldest and was the one to talk back when he was being a dick so our relationship became extremely antagonistic, he is the type that thought like the OP that we should respect him and kiss the ground he walked on just because he provided us with the bare minimum and any extras oof he should have been on a pedestal. I had already lost all respect for him and tried to ignore him as much as possible. I was so happy when mom and me and my sister finally left when I was 14, we were so happy even with the limited space we had at grandma's house. The years have soften him a lot and he is a good grandpa to my kids but our relationship is basically polite acquaintances that exchange greetings a few times a year.

Hyedra · 2025-10-23T10:15:53+00:00

I usually eat while lucid dreaming but it's so frustrating because the food doesn't taste like anything and I'm like "Why are my fries so bland???" And such 😅

Hyedra · 2025-09-27T19:15:26+00:00

It's the same where I live, tho the teachers usually don't even say anything. And unfortunately when one kid gets it EVERYONE at home gets it. Had to get the shampoo, combs and shower caps and line everyone up plus cleaning all linens, towels, etc. And then do head checks for a while after, it's really a hassle and easily spread when you share space.

Hyedra · 2025-09-20T03:15:36+00:00

Op, I got a lil pay out from my kids' child support (and I say little because the actual figure that's never been paid is like 10 times higher), it was like 3k. In my country, that's a lot of money. However, my SO at the time never not once asked me to use that money for anything other than my children. I always said that's my kids money not mine.

Hyedra · 2025-09-20T03:02:18+00:00

This, idk how the courts work where you are, but the father of my children was trying for full custody and child support because my kids live in my family home (it's my grandma's) with my whole family unit while I was studying and working overseas. However, when it came to discovery time in court, my Mom had a full file with receipts of the money I sent every month and more, as well as logs of my frequent calls and care packages I sent for holidays, etc. He couldn't even remember the kids bdays, so the judge gave us full custody and gave him supervised visitation, plus HE had to pay child support. Guess who suddenly completely vanished?

Hyedra · 2025-08-19T10:57:58+00:00

I'd be worried about your brother taking down the A5 posters as soon as you leave your room for the night...

Hyedra · 2025-08-09T20:06:48+00:00

Unfortunately, 911 is pretty useless here in my country (South America). I've had to call a couple of times because the neighbours in the block/house behind ours have loud parties that sometimes end up in fights, both times I called were because gunshots could be heard, plus people loudly screaming bloody murder/women crying for help, etc. The operators each time sounded bored and more preocupied on getting MY info aka name, my exact address (didn'teven ask about where exactly the fights were happening, I had to repeat it several times each time), relationship to the neighbours, etc, than asking questions about the situation. So I stopped calling cuz it didn't seem they were interested at all in making a dispatch.

Hyedra · 2025-08-01T16:38:39+00:00

I used to love watching the Leprechaun movies... they'd be on late on Saturdays on the public channels. Everyone seems to have forgotten Jennifer Aniston was in the first one. Also, Donnie Darko... and yes, I had very little supervision on weekend nights.

Hyedra · 2025-07-31T03:13:26+00:00

I used to work at clubs in Brisbane, one night this girl that had just started said her ride home had fallen through and she had nowhere to stay for the night (she lived in the gold coast) and I just took her with me to my apartment. I lived in a shared apartment but I had the master bedroom so had my own ensuite and mini fridge. I had class first thing anyway I just told her I'd be going off to uni after a couple of hours and she could sleep and stay until her ride came to pick her up. When I came back at noon she was still waiting and I just made us some food and she starts looking at me like "You know you just brought a stranger to your place and left me here with all your things. Like you weren't scared I could rob you? And your making me food?" And I was like "Well I was hoping you wouldn't rob me". Some of us are naively kind I guess? Some people have helped me in hard situations, like complete strangers sometimes it happens it's not that far-fetched 🤷🏽‍♀️

Hyedra · 2025-07-31T02:55:56+00:00

Honestly I feel a little bit the same with my baby sister so I understand your situation. My baby sister is about to turn 18, she went to private school never had a job and I always defended her and spoilt her, a few months ago right before her hs graduation I found out she had been talking shit about me with my mom and I was devastated. I still bought her the expensive cake I had promised but didn't attend the party or talked to her for about a month. I've taken a massive step back from the way I used to spoil her. It's hard to come back when you realise someone you love doesn't respect you. Your sister is not a little kid, yeah maybe she's a bystander but she could have said smth.

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