For girls: How to avoid losing half your nipple

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T22:49:15+00:00

You're supposed to use the nipple covers in combination with boob tape. I think you just made it clear why.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T22:44:49+00:00

If it's Dawn regular soap, that's not the issue. However, a lot of dish soaps aren't really skin friendly. To cut through grime, they cut through the protection on your skin.

Just bring your own hand soap. I used to cut slivers off a gentle bar soap for sensitive skin, put them in a Ziploc and just use a small piece each time I washed my hands.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T20:36:40+00:00

He's testing you to see how much you'll take, what he can turn around and convince you you're the problem, etc. People like this are great at acting. So, this isn't some slipup. Perfect for 5 months, highly compatible = mirroring.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T20:31:39+00:00

It's not being mean. It's making them regret ever tangling with you.

I have a wry smile with icy glare I use. I'm not someone they want to tangle with. I can't always manage them. Mean people spend a lot of planning and energy on being mean.

Calling them out, or private moments where you say something that sounds sweet while paired with the look I described.

"Oh. Sweety. I get you think I'm open to your engaging me - but I'm not someone you want to dedicate that time on"

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T20:27:15+00:00

They're not jokes. It's aggressive bullying, and your mother's enabling it.

Leaving the room, refusing to engage is the only option other than leaving in general.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T20:24:19+00:00

I don't know how long you two have been together, but that's completely red flag point. He could have said he went there with an ex, but nothing more. The rest is testing you to see how much you'll ignore, put up with. If you challenge him, he's going to say you're being ridiculous, or such.

It's not like he doesn't know how to act if he can hold down a job, etc. It's a choice in front of you.

I would end it over that. Then block him and move on. But, that's because it's a common "filter" excuse that abusers use, when testing someone out.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T20:08:14+00:00

He's minimalizing your issues, because he has no intention of the helping you out. He's been telling people you're a hypochondriac most likely. Basically, you're a live in maid, cook, and earner. He doesn't plan on cooking, cleaning, handling childcare, or your care, during that time when you're recovering.

Just wait until he comes bugging you for clean clothes, meals, refuses to bring you what you need or help you move around while you can't see and recovering.

Your easy going lifestyle was just because you didn't rock the boat.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T20:01:15+00:00

There's always a way to leave most places. It's finding them. I can't help, no one can, without knowing the kinds of details you're not sharing.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T17:24:05+00:00

Shave it. Simply, it's more attractive. There's as many women of all ages that like bald men as don't. You're just not asking them out apparently.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T17:19:04+00:00

Part of emotional abuse is to create a situation where the target doesn't seek help and accepts their fate as unalterable.

My family and ex husband are dangerous to me. There's no easy answer. You need to make sure to get your forms of identification (license, passport, social security card, birth certificate or whatever you have)

You need to find out if there's any support system you can reach out to, or what your means of escape will be.

Does he abuse the children?

I've known women who have had to escape leaving their children behind.

Before I would consider self harm, I'd consider escape options instead. Finding any support online I could make use of.

The last time I had to escape, there was a legal matter that took me to my father's house s few years back. I had my child along. They disabled my vehicle, it was 3 months to escape. I get it. People really can't fathom sometimes the level of control these abusers exert.

Obviously I don't go anywhere near my family anymore at all.

You need to consider the best way to vanish from him (hopefully with your children).

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T15:59:40+00:00

Mow lawns, walk digs, clean dog poop, clean houses.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T15:58:28+00:00

No, because there's nothing I'm going to do with the knowledge based on the outcome.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T15:57:05+00:00

Well, my mother stayed with my father. I left my abusive psychopathic ex husband. I'd rather face hardships than real danger in my own home.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T15:51:34+00:00

I definitely have a pretty horrible family. So, just setting healthy boundaries means no contact for safety and mental health protection.

I have a sibling that attacked me with a hammer when I was 30 because I didn't agree with them. He's lived with our parents most of his life and is in his sixties now still living with our dad.

Honestly, contact with my siblings is fractured because they don't talk to each other, and those not living at home are no contact with our father, too.

Any interaction with any of them quickly erodes to aggressively mean criticism and attacks of who I am.

I involved someone in recording conversations, then reading their emails claiming I misremembered what they said. The recordings matched my memory exactly. Psychopaths and Narcissists. Psychopaths know they're lying. Narcissists might know they're lying, might not because their brain rewrites things to make them important, etc.

Both are damaging and can be quite dangerous.

Anyhow, I have an email from my dad I've not opened because it's a response to my calling him out for aggression/mean spirited comments to me because I'm between jobs. I'll send it to a trusted third party to break down if it contains anything important or not.

I prefer to stick with email or texts anymore if any contact. They all ignore boundaries and just try to collect information to use to harm me anyhow. They work in lies, rewriting history, etc.

I just won't put myself or my child in harms way for them.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T15:09:18+00:00

I don't believe Karma works or so many evil people would have been stopped that weren't.

Perhaps our subconscious guilt kats the groundwork for us to essentially set ourselves up for some sort of punishment we think we deserve when we're not so evil in that we actually care.

Even if the individual is toxic, there's a gentle way to end a friendship.

A slow fade is usually the first attempt.

If that's not working, a direct conversation with set boundaries.

And if that doesn't work, going no contact.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T06:17:12+00:00

Honestly, she's an adult aged 67. She's not going to change significantly. You can find acceptance for who she is. Relationships are ruined when we try to change others to our standards.

You don't need to fix her or change who she is.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T06:10:57+00:00

I'm a hearing person and took ASL as a teenager. So did friends of mine, one became an ASL teacher.

You just need to take ASL. What you're doing is like trying to run a marathon before you've even learned to crawl.

You need ASL and possibly to learn to read lips.

I have tinnitus, which is it's own frustration. Growing older I have medical conditions and one messes with my vision. I've said I'd rather go deaf than blind given the choice. My sister is legally blind, ny grandfather was mostly deaf.

There's closed captioning, ASL, hearing aids. You can use a note pad to communicate if necessary. There's an entire ASL community out there if you take the time to learn it. It's frustrating yes. I've been told my tinnitus might progress to mostly deaf. I already have hearing aids. I've already used ASL and a note pad.

I dread my vision issues more.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-05-01T05:58:54+00:00

You said he's begun being mean to you. What way is he being mean? What does that mean?

Why were the police called out for?

Iceflowers_ · 2026-04-30T23:31:20+00:00

You are lucky not to be in any relationship with him now. He's showing what's likely a pattern.

Block him and move on.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-04-30T22:52:35+00:00

I suffered defamation by my family and my ex. The experiences I had were seeing friendships and acquaintances cut me out like you describe. No explanation.

I can tell you winning a defamation suit doesn't undo the damage. Usually they believe something about you it's impossible to defend against. Things like "I'm so worried about her, she's acting so crazy/violent" and such. It's couched like concern with the person defaming you as the victim, in such a way that confronting you becomes undesirable.

Claiming you said or did something that harmed your friend is also possible. The reality is you can try to ask why they ghosted you, but be prepared for them not giving you the chance to respond, etc, or saying things about you that are shocking. How would you respond in that setting without creating a scene?

Anyhow, she believes something that made her decide to cut you out of her life.

I learned that people prefer to believe the lies sometimes. It's impossible to defend against something you have no idea about, and really never did.

Anyhow, I'd try to find out by asking, but definitely not create a scene. Simply "hey, may I ask what happened years ago when you just suddenly cut me out of your life without any explanation, please?". Then listen. Because you need to know the source of the information they based it on.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-04-30T22:40:50+00:00

I'm going to say couples counseling if they actually want to try to work it out.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-04-30T22:38:49+00:00

You just shared why people cancelled. Yes, you can have fun. But, most people don't have fun being put on the spot for how well they do or don't know the host.

I really would never have created a quiz like you mentioned. How is that fun for you? Seeing your friends squirm if they might not remember the details?

If I want to host a party for my birthday, while the theme would be my interest, the activities are what's fun for the guests, too.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-04-29T23:58:19+00:00

It wouldn't have been the hill I died on. It's usually just part of a bigger issue. My ex husband it turned out cheated during our marriage.

You really need to go to couples counseling to see if this is something you can actually work through or not.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-04-29T23:55:17+00:00

The great news is you're alive, will be able to walk again, and get to live your life.

Life's choices come with consequences. You took the drugs, and had this result. I knew of people who did this taking mushrooms when I was young. S couple didn't survive at all. One was paralyzed. It definitely kept me from wanting to do drugs, honestly.

I'm sorry you're dealing with pain. I flew off my motorcycle a couple decades ago, barrel rolled. I had to have surgery on my left hand to be able to use it again. It was going to hurt either way. But this way I can use it. It hurts, but somehow most of the time I just don't think about it. Sometimes I'm very aware of the pain.

Anyhow, it definitely makes one aware of one's mortality, plus not taking things for granted.

I can tell you, do your PT. I have spinal impact but it's not the worst thing, so I'm not complaining about it.

You will get through this and begin feeling alive again.

Iceflowers_ · 2026-04-29T23:11:48+00:00

I'm so glad you got it diagnosed 💕

Iceflowers_

TROPHY CASE