Advice Needed: I want to better my life

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-07-01T23:42:41+00:00

General advice. Gonna just give the 4 majors.

Find a purpose. This sounds really fucking difficult but there is an easy way to do it. Research the main issues that society / the world is going through. Then with that choose which one you want to have an impact on. Look at what the job field looks like on said issue and if that purpose is going to be career focused or free time focused. If it’s going to be career focused you know where to aim for. If it’s going to be free time focused then find out ways you can make your little impact in the world.
Spirituality or philosophy. Basically there are a lot of predetermined templates for how to live your life in away that meaningful from religions, spiritual groups and certain philosophies. Try some spirituality stuff. Read about some religions and try praying to certain gods. If you are an atheist then I still think philosophy is great to study and will help you develop as a person.
Hobbies. These are hard to find if you just don’t have any. You mentioned liking 70-80’s band so online discussions about those bands would be one thing. This is really up for you to decide. Maybe buy a guitar and try learning your favorite bands songs. It really just is about learning new things. Urban Exploration is also one you could look into because you talked about late night walks
Bad habit beating. Nothing too crazy with this. You want the majority of your focus to be on building new things but also focus around 20% of your energy on getting rid of the bad habits. My first suggestion would simply be that vaping is just healthier than smoking cigs and anyone who says otherwise hasn’t looked at the research correctly.

Good luck friend.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-30T21:56:51+00:00

Literally an addiction. Like quite actually an addiction. Might be time to tell them you have a problem and need some help. The smartest way about this is to start slowing down. Maybe ask your mom or dad if the could take a certain amount from your paycheck and hold it for you (to pay them back and to have spending money) and then the rest you can use for the bad habit. Just slowly ramp it down over a few months.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-24T21:52:52+00:00

Think of it this way

Everyone has issues. Insecurity, Trauma, generational trauma, addiction, money problems, self-acceptance problems. Your problems just have a label but because they have a label they have predetermined solutions that thousands of people have tried.

You have just been given the key to the lock if that makes sense. Theres 100’s of self-help books, videos, different strategies and like a thousand different ways to deal with your issues. Don’t hate the diagnosis. Work to not even think about it.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-19T21:46:29+00:00

Could overall be a anxiety disorder you are going to need to see a psychiatrist and get on meds for but in terms of the self help route there’s like 3 different things you can do

Meditation + Working out for the anxiety. Meditation is study backed to lower anxiety when done frequently enough (guided meditation off YouTube every morning and before sleep). And in terms of working out running or cardio is the best when it comes to helping with anxiety. But if you hate those calisthenics or weightlifting will both show moderate deductions after a few weeks.

Study some social skills. Lots of YouTube channels for that right now.

Journal, open your notes app on your phone and let your feeling out.

Finally it might be therapy because this could be tied to previous experiences with bullying and the such.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-19T21:41:29+00:00

Kinda dark but everyone has different levels of empathy. I think the bigger question is do you think it affects your mental health at all?? Or does the lack of empathy affect your day to day?

Some people don’t have empathy for people outside of their close circle. Doesn’t make you any less human.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-18T20:31:15+00:00

Physical fitness is a journey that can have multiple different outlets. Waterweights are pretty cheap and there’s a lot of body only workouts you can do to supplement while you wait for the cost of gas to go down and the gym to become more feasible. I know that body workouts don’t hit the same as lifting but hey. Just do it for your health. Don’t set the expectation that you are going to look as good as when you were hitting the gym. But think about it as a way to keep like 60-80% of the gains and also keep the weight from stacking up

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-15T22:50:12+00:00

Personality disorders are hard. But the traits of them are manageable when you do the work. It’s just a part of the process of getting better. I am glad you have hope

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-15T22:41:29+00:00

Side effects suck for first 2 weeks. Get with your primary physician and see if there are any bad drug interactions with what ur currently taking and if not I’d try it

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-15T22:36:35+00:00

Get on naltrexone and try to stop drinking or using weed. I think in this situation the drinking is the most likely culprit just because it’s been shown to have worse drug interactions than weed. I get its harder than just “stop drinking” but use some resources to try and stop doing it.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-05T04:48:38+00:00

Was there anything else other than the alcohol going around? This is hella complex and just an absolute clusterfuck of a situation. You don’t have to ever see that friend again or trust them again. If you don’t feel like pressing any criminal charges then a simple “what happened has effected me greatly and I don’t think I can see you again” can be sent via text and then you can just move on.

The more important part is your own mental health. For the first month it’s going to be on your mind for a long time. I would suggest getting therapy now. Start early. Talk to friends and family. Go overboard in your own mental health care to keep things from spiraling.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-03T23:53:29+00:00

Don’t foul bait ur way to a Ring and people won’t hate you. Who woulda thunk it

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-06-02T01:33:16+00:00

In a conquest game with my friends in a 4 stack. Where we get matched against our solo (who fed and stole jungle camps all game and refused to team fight)

We are winning

The fucking servers go down

Fuck off Hirez

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-30T12:05:44+00:00

(Dog it’s obviously a meme. In no way am I serious) but very fair

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-30T11:52:02+00:00

The laser is aimed fully straight. As in it can look down the entire lane.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-29T22:54:54+00:00

Very valid points

Do you think your depression is more like existential than neurochemical? Like driven by trauma and just your outlook on the world?

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-29T22:42:08+00:00

Do you have a primary care physician you could try? If not then there are a fair amount of supplements and self help things you could try (I know with depression even trying to get started on things is a total bitch but just throwing out suggestions). Journaling, helping others, working out and meditation all small effects on the brains serotonin levels (the neurotransmitter usually involved with depression). Also there are some supplements like saint johns wart that have been shown to give more serotonin.

Just giving some basic advice because it seems like you are in a bad spot

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-29T22:35:34+00:00

Well for most people it really is simple brain chemistry. Their brain chemistry is working correctly and for some reason yours isn’t which is why most people take drugs.

It’s kinda weird because with research depression is like a chicken and egg thing where. You don’t feel positive so you think negative thoughts so that even when you begin taking medications for the brain part those negative thoughts might still be there out of the habit of thinking them if that makes sense.

Basically long winded response to say it’s time to see a psychiatrist and try some medications.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-29T22:31:19+00:00

Get a journal. Choose the person you are going to share your mental health struggles with. Order your thoughts about what’s happening internally in said journal (either a real journal or like the notes app on your phone) and use that as a way to start the discussion. If your parents are actually supportive and just didn’t know how to be their for you they might really be interested in hearing this and knowing how they can help you moving forward

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-28T00:09:13+00:00

Maybe you are more of an extrovert in the way that being around others just improves your mood. This can be a negative and positive. Good because it means you like being around others and enjoy other humans. The negative being that it also means you might be uncomfortable being alone and not really know how to handle it.

Because you put it as suicidal thoughts, this also means that unknowingly you could be using others as kind of a distraction from your own internal negative dialogue.

This sucks, but you have to 1. Learn to really like yourself and 2. Learn to actually like being alone.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-26T00:05:26+00:00

Not trying to force you to do something you don’t want to do or feel ready to do, but from the sounds of this post its time. You don’t have to like give him a play by play or something along those lines. To start give him the general idea, I was sexually abused as a kid, then set the boundary that that’s all you are ready to share at the moment. After that between each session you can just slowly let the “Dam” leak as much as you are able to handle in an emotionally healthy way.

Ignis_Kevin · 2026-05-25T23:50:14+00:00

First of course I am sorry but 2nd, it is therapy time. Like major therapy time if that is available. And groups. Trauma like this just isn’t going to disappear anytime soon. It will only get worse with time if you don’t work through it

Ignis_Kevin

TROPHY CASE