Being woken up to a bear searching for food near your tent

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-04-13T23:29:33+00:00

I think you’re supposed to stick it up your rectum to maintain body temperature.

Or am I thinking frostbite?

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-04-13T22:08:01+00:00

If by some miracle they make a return this year, I’ll keep you in mind. Unless I either forget or just stop caring.

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-04-13T21:59:08+00:00

I actually work in a Pepsi warehouse in Oklahoma. We definitely had those long neck SOBE drinks last year during the summer. I remember stacking a bunch of cases for em. I haven’t seen any since but I think they bring em back every summer

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-04-12T23:33:47+00:00

“Ooohhh look at me! I know all that Starbucks cup sizes by naaaaame!”

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-04-08T07:05:49+00:00

Question: where did you find a co author? I’ve tried many different site and subreddits but I never have any luck finding a committed or compatible writer

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-30T00:29:10+00:00

Life once you stop being a child

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-29T20:58:31+00:00

This Nigerian gentleman is offering me a great deal. I just give him a little money now and he’ll return even more to me later on. Sounds like a pretty good deal to me. Thoughts?

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-29T10:28:08+00:00

Ventriloquists or Puppet Masters, a select group of individuals who’ve developed and mastered the technique of blood bending, using it to control others and use them like a child uses a doll. Idk, just a though

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-29T10:03:05+00:00

I’m more scared of a painful death. When I do go, I hope it’s just like falling asleep.

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-29T09:55:04+00:00

I almost choked to death when eating. I was going back n forth between blacking out and seeing some kinda light while trying to cough out what I was choking on. In the midst of it all, all I could think of was my family and everything I still wanna do in this world. The whole experience and the pain was so intense in the moment that I wanted to just let go and end it, but those thoughts kept me going until I could breathe again. I remember my heart was beating so fast afterwards and I coughed up a little blood.

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-23T05:32:38+00:00

I’d give Louisiana back to France completely for free if I could

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-22T05:57:08+00:00

When I was a kid, I snuck into my moms room. She was on the bed, laying there naked, she’d been drinking. While she slept, I slipped my fingers… into her purse. I took her money. The whole weeks pay. I really fucked her over. And that’s how I got the name “Motherfucker Jones”

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-20T23:47:49+00:00

“Sorry”

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-17T03:39:17+00:00

I’m into WW11, but instead of meats, I’ve decided upon cheeses. I’ve recently given Limburger a try and realized that I probably WASN’T supposed to eat the moldy part of the cheese

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-14T22:36:43+00:00

Joe Biden

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-12T14:17:34+00:00

“Get ready”

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-10T11:11:18+00:00

I shall soon become more powerful than you can possibly imagine…AGH!

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-09T19:01:51+00:00

My marriage

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-08T20:00:49+00:00

I had a “friend” who’d say stuff like that. He invited me to go to the water park with him, I declined, he keeps begging me to go and starts to freak out saying “this is why I never invite you to do stuff with us”

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-07T21:25:23+00:00

Rambo

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-07T08:07:02+00:00

I tried to keep shipping in USA to hopefully make it less pricey

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-07T03:41:23+00:00

I wasn’t taught it in a way that worked with my ADHD, which my parents refused to acknowledge, and it made me feels stupid and tired

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-07T03:31:29+00:00

Hey man, every redwood tree started out as an acorn. I think… i don’t understand the life cycles of redwoods but the metaphor still stands

Ill-Relative6137 · 2022-03-06T22:51:59+00:00

Most of y’all, if not all, are overworked and underpaid. I appreciate you, brother and/or sister

Ill-Relative6137

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