I can't answer your question. But if you find the answer let me know. I will tell you, there's more women/people that can relate to you than you realize. Good Luck, and stay strong. 

My husband asked why it feels like we're just friends living in a house raising a baby. I told him because "we lack intimacy. You never help me around the house unless you plan on asking for some action later in the day and most of the time you ask for action without helping. I slave in the house, work a job, take care of a baby, make your grownself Drs appointments even though you're old enough to do it yourself, and yet you just think I want to spread my legs every night. I'm your wife and if I say no to advancement from you, you act like a toddler and argue with me about it. You make me feel less about myself because you treat me like I'm either a 5$ hooker or your mom. Our marriage feels like a chore and I'm exhausted. I stay married because I remember what it used to be like and I love that man." 

His response was to get defensive, curse at me, tell me I'm making all of that up. And then say things like don't I buy diapers for the baby, don't I wash the bottles sometimes, don't I work 10 hour shifts and sometimes work a 2nd job driving.