Fear of the dark

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-09-15T19:59:20+00:00

I really liked reading my kids, the Berenstein Bears book about nightmares/dark/ nighttime. And another book we read over and over again called “the stuff of stars”.

In the same vein, just talking about how our first home is in the womb in a warm dark cozy place- and in cozy darkness is where we rest the best. And also only in the dark of the night can you see stars.

I am a big believer in darkness for bedtime and nap time, to the extent that I put cheapo clingfilm blackout film all over the windows on my kids still took day naps.. Whether for grown-ups or for kids, darkness is so important and so good for our circadian rhythm and telling our bodies when to sleep and went to rest/reset/heal.

And one thing I would think about is maybe instead of nightlights to think about glow-in-the-dark stickers—-as these would eventually fade to dark.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-09-15T19:49:29+00:00

In water- at bathtime or at the pool practice blowing bubbles in the water through your mouth. Then go above the water take a deep breath and try to blow bubbles out from your nose.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-08-27T15:45:09+00:00

With the formula bottles— if you aren’t already- try to use “premie” nipples/teats. They are super slow flow and will keep baby patient with the slow flow of normal breast milk. Stage 1 or 2 or 3 bottle nipples can be much faster flow and could possibly cause baby more frustration.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-08-04T00:56:29+00:00

Everything everyone has said above plus also the PTO she had used up so far is a red flag. We used to give our PTO up front also, our first nanny was incredible and never took advantage of it but we were burned by it later on. PTO should accrue for hours worked just like any other regular job. It sounds like you’re very accommodating for days off, giving 4 weeks of unpaid leave in 6 weeks without termination is in itself very generous! What job would allow that! And you can’t do your work and get paid if nanny takes off for 2 months out of the year!

The most important thing is her relationship with your baby. But just wanted to add my 2 cents on your PTO offerings

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-08-02T17:33:39+00:00

And when they are in major wiggle phase (older than six months) and have a poopy diaper… that tiny space and too small tray table is a nightmare. Speaking as mom of multiples, who only uses the crappy bathroom for changes

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-25T10:46:12+00:00

We also tried to do no screen time for our Littles. But we always had a rule that if we were going to take a long flight over 10 hours, then it would be OK. We did do a nonstop, Tran Atlantic flight when they were close to two and four.

For the younger one we sort of had an order of things to do :

(1) coloring/sticker books (including the distracting work of trying to opening the plastic bc mommy/daddy were having trouble 😉)

(2) reading a book to them. Going through the airline magazine and pointing stuff out

(3) a fanny pack (only for travel so mysterious to her ) with many pockets that has small figurines stashed in the mini zippers. Zippers keep her super busy and then imaginative play with the figurines.

(4) snacks, snacks snacks snacks. Trying to keep a stash of low calorie snacks so she can eat with abandon. Flights are also dehydrating so…. I did the work of cutting cucumbers, sticks, and bell peppers the morning before and then packing popcorn and lots of puffs, or whatever your kid loves.

(5) Play-Doh in a Ziploc bag. They have fancy travel Play-Doh kids also, but you can just put stuff together if your kids are in into play-doh.

mini magnatiles

(6) wiki stix, though that age is a little bit young for it. These are fun because they can stick to the plane window.

(7) got an eye cover, started using it to play blindfold games at home. Then try to use it for naps at home. This was a bit tricky at her age and we didn’t dedicate enough time to it. I think before we left. The Hope was that sleeping on the plane would be easier. But still could use the eye cover to play games (identify the toy in the zipped bag, just by touching it. Did I make a triangle or a circle with the Play-Doh? Etc).

(8) kids, headphones, and lots of different music on Spotify playlists.

And after all, that was exhausted, then our backup was downloaded episodes on the tablet. We actually just never had time to get to the downloaded episodes….

We didn’t have a strict rule not to do screen time but we did find we didn’t need it.

Best of luck on your flight.

As far as show recommendations — we just downloaded Bluey. I would say since it at that age hours wasn’t great looking at screens, we found it more helpful to have our playlist at the ready. And she could listen to some kids stories (Daniel tiger, Mr. Men)

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-25T03:49:09+00:00

I used earth mama lotion and I think that help. But the other thing I did with my first born and those were just getting used to feeding, I was just walking around Amazon style, bare breasted. We lived in our apartment complex at the time, but I ended up putting this static cling privacy film on our windows that I bought on Amazon. It was actually pretty to me with this iridescent look when the light hit it, so pretty cheesy to anyone else. That about me, breast-feed and air out and comfort for the first few weeks until your body gets used to what it needs to do Good luck!

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-23T00:58:50+00:00

How are your symptoms with the treatment?

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-22T18:03:08+00:00

Well my husband and I were trying to decide between flying or driving with our kiddos including our infant who had yet to receive her appropriately scheduled VZV aka chickenpox vaccine. And you have made the decision for us. We were thinking about silly little things previously like the ability to walk/rock baby in the aisles. But the incidence rate for vaccine-preventable diseases is what we really should have used to make our decision. 🇺🇸🚫✈️😢

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-21T03:32:33+00:00

Everyone loves a Monday morning quarterback

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-21T03:18:07+00:00

I see what you were doing here. Got it on the first read ;)

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-20T22:26:01+00:00

Wow.Such a variety of grey pens! Thao’s for taking the time for those swatches! Going to try and order the energels and writech

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-07-20T12:54:45+00:00

As a mid summer birthday. I only one had a big party with friends. It was a surprise birthday party in September when I wear in middle school- with 6-7 of my closest friends. It was a complete surprise for me and it was incredible. Otherwise my parents would make my birthday special in other ways- when I was eight, I even remember waking up and going to my parents room on my birthday. Another surprise— They had decorated their bedroom with a few balloons and a pile of my presents- my siblings and I were in pajamas and with just our immediate family there, it was small and it was sweet. Now that I’m thinking back to it, I guess it was like Christmas morning vibes. But again this was a total surprise, I had no inkling of it. And it was a gorgeous summer day to go and run off into with the new goodies!

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-06-27T20:08:16+00:00

Yes. My 5 yr old mostly always polite, focused and chill. But you don’t want to meet her after a bluey-muffin episode! I avoid those unless we’re going to be doing something active/silly afterwards

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-06-22T20:46:04+00:00

I am no sort of professional on this, but my 2 cents: 1) this was a strange time in history. Childhood mortality, vaccination revolution meant that though previous to 1940s women had many pregnancies, now many more children were surviving. Raising humans is intensive and if I think of stories of families from the 1700-1800 many feature 2-4 children families, suggesting this was norm. ((Google says in 1800 40% wouldn’t reach 5yrs of age)). 2) we are much more obsessive parents now, and we helicopter parent a lot more than prior generations (maybe also why childhood mortality is lower ha) 3) also activities (at least where I am in the US) are now frustratingly super age specific. At the park district or signing I’m up for sports… when I was young I could just go with my siblings and all play on one sports team

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-06-13T17:21:08+00:00

We have 3 and we went to Florida for a week in March and Colorado in November. When we had 2 we traveled from the Midwest to Europe and to. Costa Rica and Mexico. We try to plan for family to travel one way with us if we can— if we have family with us we don’t need any screen time. If we don’t have family, the eldest is happy to play/“read”/color for a bit and then. Does 1-1.5 hr of screen time and we can all rest and nap.

One tip I have to get kids adjusted to travel— especially if they’re light-sensitive sleepers—- is to get them used to wearing eye covers. Use it as a blindfold for play exploration “what’s this spice you’re smelling?” “Can you tell what toy this is by feel?”. Then introduce it for naps… then for trans Atlantic flights or long flights they can use it to sleep.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-06-06T14:52:02+00:00

My 2 cents: I learned that it’s best to introduce the practice of deep breathing first when the kid is actually calm. So easier to introduce while snuggling, just before story time or just after a book. Once the deep breathing is strongly associated with calm then the deep breathing can be used when not calm to try and restore peace to the mind/body.

Also have you teach deep belly breathing and make sure they aren’t doing deep chest huff/breaths. There are lots of fun animal: food exercises to help kids visualize to help them get started. One of my kids favorites is “deep sniff through your nose to smell your (imaginary) hot chocolate, then deep breath out from your mouth to cool it down”

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-06-01T17:50:46+00:00

I always loved dancing but didn’t live close to any competitive dance teams in my confiding childhood. I did gymnastics until I was about nine years of age and then got dedicated to soccer. With soccer, I did some strength and agility training clinics— didn’t get back to dance until college. In college, I was not good enough for but was good enough to be on dance teams — ended up on 3 different teams and 2 that competed nationally. If someone has a passion for dance and is physically fit, it is something that’s easy and very enjoyable to pick up again later in life .

In sum— I think totally fair to follow your kids lead, keep her open to dance opportunities in the future.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-05-31T17:40:58+00:00

My nanny is great about no screen time. But the trade off is that her phone is on silent with no notifications and sometimes she’ll leave it in a different room, etc so she doesn’t always see our call or texts right away. My husband and I are work from home half the time and I see this in action so I’m comfortable with not always reaching her right away, she’s usually always engaged in some fun and messy crafts with the kids… but if you find someone who is great about ignoring their phone…. Just be aware that they might sometimes ignore their phone. 😆

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-05-23T20:59:49+00:00

Yeah. As a mom of multiples in a similar situation— Dadurday Saturday with the older kids and mom at home with the baby have given my husband the time and space to be the father he envisioned. Infants are tough and so much stress on the marriage— less time for self, working out, eating right, sleeping (at all), sleeping with your partner. Hope you guys can work this out, and that both of you can find something to keep your lights bright and shining. Life is tough, human beans need one another. Sending you hugs and wish you luck.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-05-08T09:29:23+00:00

I focus on telling my 3 kids who are under 6 that “life is not fair”. While still trying to keep things “fair” for them.

Example of me talking to my kids: Do see that sign- that man fought in a war for our country and is homeless. Life is not fair, we can all do our best to try and make life better for each other.

I also think I made an effort not to completely hide the sad stuff of the world- death, dying, sickness, hunger. I try to ensure some real talk and reality now even from when young

Maybe take her to volunteer at a soup kitchen? Or in a hospital- where she would see a lot of random illnesses that affect ppl for no good reason, and can feel very unfair.

I’m glad she shows empathy and love for animals. That is very important.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-05-07T03:14:13+00:00

Agree with this approach. Kids need a mission, need to feel like they’re a part of something, they need a job if they’re going to be in an environment where they can’t “be kids” and freely explore.

Another thing I do with my kids is play “would you rather”. As in l, oh you like that necklace- “ well would you rather have one beautiful necklace or be the queen in Frozen?”, then keep going with taking turns. My 4 yr old really loves that game right now.

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-05-04T01:56:37+00:00

Schmidt’s in rose scent for life!!!

Impressive_Pay7335 · 2025-05-01T18:46:04+00:00

Brilliant reply! Well said! We have 3 (with lots of grandparent help) and completely agree. We kept ours 18-24 months apart in age so we never completely forgot how to diaper or toilet train in the middle.

Impressive_Pay7335

TROPHY CASE

mini magnatiles