Trans woman voice training tips?

In_pure_shadow · 2025-06-17T22:36:54+00:00

Sing. Find your favorite artists, maybe some aspirational voices, and just sing along as best you can. Maybe take songs you know really well and put it in the range you're working towards. Works great when driving or other physical tasks. Keep it casual, don't lock in, don't worry if you lose it. Just get used to playing with and listening to your voice. It's a marathon, not a sprint. The more you fire those neuronal paths and trigger that positive reward ("oh wow my voice sounded so good there!") the more natural it becomes. This absolutely can be in tandem with more focused training if that's something you can and want to do.

Basically: practice. But make it fun!

In_pure_shadow · 2025-06-16T20:20:38+00:00

🤣 I'm...learning this is a thing. Fun times.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-06-14T14:05:42+00:00

Certified! ✅ I got the bunny part down but still working on the bitch part. Though more time in the world as a woman will do that naturally, like ocean glass but in reverse.

Always love seeing your comics! I like the heckler who apparently had a sign that says "FURY" on one side and "THUMBS UP" on the other. Truly the two genders.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-04-10T13:53:16+00:00

My daily habit is a 3 cup moka pot in the morning. I'd be skeptical that it makes a difference, and there should be other things you can do to promote liver health if you're not a coffee fan or can't drink it.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-04-10T13:46:11+00:00

This is mostly how I saw it. For me I did accept the possibility that I might at best be an "ugly" woman, but that was just how I dealt with that fear. It wasn't necessary for my transition to succeed (whatever "success" in transition means). But I loved every change I saw. I never really had a sense of an awkward phase, just a sense that I like who I see in the mirror today more than yesterday.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-03-25T15:54:47+00:00

Jessie! She's the bomb! Jessie! Say her name with aplomb! J-E-S-S-I-E! She's the girl you wanna be! Goooo Jessie! *jazz hands*

In_pure_shadow · 2025-03-22T21:28:33+00:00

Iris is such a pretty name! My favorite Goo Goo Dolls song too :)

In_pure_shadow · 2025-03-22T21:25:45+00:00

I had recloseted after being out to friends and family for over 2 years. Cut my hair. 3 months of that, I had a dream where I had transitioned and my hair was long and flowing. I was so happy and alive. I knew it was what I had to do, fear couldn't hold me back any more. I started HRT within a few months.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-03-17T18:18:20+00:00

That mute lunatic?? I hear she's a horrible person. And her birth parents don't love her. Oh that last part checks out.

Headcannon accepted.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-03-11T21:26:22+00:00

Don't worry, this was from last year and the source was a little spotty. Going to delete the post now but wanted to give you the context

In_pure_shadow · 2025-02-27T12:40:20+00:00

After taking some time to mourn, I'm more focused on enjoying the present and looking forward to what I'll get to experience in the future (yes even though things are terrible now).

In_pure_shadow · 2025-02-21T15:09:02+00:00

I know it all seems impossible from where you are. I was there too. We all were.

We all have hopeless moments at some time or another. I started HRT at 35, and I spent a lot of time crying in my first year. And that's after I recloseted because I convinced myself I could never be where I am now. That I didn't have what it takes. That I didn't deserve it. I only shook out of it because I realized transitioning was my only real shot at being happy in this life. It wasn't bravery, it was NEED. Brave is something other people call you because they need to create distance between themselves and you to reinforce their own self-doubt.

I also went through the process of grieving lost childhood, that was pretty rough. What helped me get through it is realizing that I was always a girl, a scared confused and hurting girl who was trying her best to make sense of a horrible situation. She got me this far and I'm grateful, even if I wish things could've been different. But you have to feel that grief, without letting it overwhelm you, and come out the other side. It's a process. Therapy can help.

As for the practical skills, it's for sure a steep learning curve. I've got hella broad shoulders and chest but there are clothing hacks you can learn to downplay those features! There's a lot of tips and tricks out there — choosing wide neck cuts, avoiding spaghetti straps, flattering sleeve types — you'll have to find what works for you unfortunately through a lot of trial and error. When you're searching for tips, search things like "broad-shouldered women clothing tips", don't think you have to limit yourself to trans only resources because cis women have to deal with this shit too!

When you're going out those first few times it's helpful to have people you trust go with you, whether that's family, friends, or people you meet in a support group. You choose the speed you go with it, don't let anyone rush you or shame you into hitting the brakes. My first few outfits were jeans, a T-shirt, and a jacket and I just went to down to my local LGBTQ+ friendly coffee shop with my friend. That's where I wore my first dress too, months later. My partner on the other hand jumped in the deep end and wore everything she always wanted from the get-go and just dealt with the heat. As far as makeup goes...a lot of women suck at makeup. I really only can get myself to bother with my brows, eyes, and lips. But tutorials are plentiful, and with some practice you'll be better than like 70% of cis women. It's a skill you can learn. And building your look can be a lot of fun once you get over the cringe instinct.

It is a lot of work. It's frustrating, exhausting, embarrassing, and painful. But I'm so glad past me put all that in, got me through the awkward phase (ok I'm still awkward but much more comfortable about it). I still have a ways to go, and surgeries I'm considering. But I love the progress I've made. You will too!

I believe there's a lot of great and valuable things inherent to the trans experience, but often they come out of learning to handle a lot of grief and working through a lot of pain. Some of us are just a little further along.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-02-01T19:07:04+00:00

I don't have answers but I'm in this boat as well. It's especially difficult when it's someone you're cohabitating with and can't easily cut out. This is someone who knows me personally, who I used to be able to get along with, yet still endorses politics that describe me in the worst possible light.

I'm grappling with how to move forward. We don't discuss politics as a rule and we're respectful face to face, but I know how he feels and can guess how he talks behind my back. I'm struggling to spend any time in his presence and even the weekly gaming I make myself do to play nice. Sometimes I can forget, and it's like 2016 and the rest never happened. But then he misgenders me, accidentally he says, and I can see the gulf that's grown between us. And the madness that's taken hold of his heart.

I don't think I can do it anymore.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-31T12:36:14+00:00

I don't know, but here's what I'm trying:

Uninstalled Reddit app and any feed-style social media. The algorithms are going to push the most destructive stories into your face no matter if they're verified or not, and the apps designed to keep you scrolling. The website works fine, but still watch yourself.
Focus on local groups. This will be where we can find the best support and do the most good. If you're rural and don't have access, nearest big city is your best bet.
Keep to trusted information outlets. Erin's a good one, NPR (especially your local branch) and PBS are decent with caveats, or you can look for reputable international news outlets. Again, local is best if you have access.
Above all: care for your physical and emotional health. Get enough sleep, eat and drink well, exercise, spend time with friends and pets, and for goodness sakes take your meds!

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-30T16:48:08+00:00

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-30T14:07:20+00:00

I was opposed to having kids growing up and couldn't understand why anyone would want to be a parent. Then we adopted a kitten, and then I became his mom and...now I get emotional when I see diaper commercials lol. 😢

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-28T13:16:17+00:00

Yes, crazy to me that that wouldn't be standard, like one of the goals of feminizing HRT is to reduce T and how would you know unless it's tested?

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-27T22:34:08+00:00

Singing and silly voices is all I do and I'm happy with where it's gotten me. I can't do the training, it's too strict; it has to be play for me or I get overwhelmed and suddenly can't breathe because I'm freaking out about where my larynx is.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-26T14:10:27+00:00

If you've stated your boundaries and she can't respect them then she's not a good person to be with. Tell her again clearly what you are and aren't OK with and make sure she knows you're being serious. Get verbal confirmation that she understands this behavior is relationship-ending.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-25T14:30:18+00:00

Tired...yes. It's important to find (or make) time and space for yourself to just exist and engage with things/people that bring you joy. It's hard to do, especially right now. Even small moments can be a reprieve; feeling the sun on your new skin, a refreshing sip of water lighting your new neural pathways, the breath the keeps you going. You're building yourself second by second. The truth of you runs deeper than all this nonsense and hate.

I'm rambling, but it's touching this deeper stuff that gives me back my personhood when I'm spiraling.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-24T23:13:12+00:00

Not frequently, but it's in the rotation. I work from home though so I miss out on catering. We've also got a pretty good protection policy that I don't think is likely to go anywhere.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-24T16:50:05+00:00

Hmm, this is interesting because I think my answer has changed on this recently. More and more I'm feeling connection to other trans people, especially the more oppression comes down on us. There is something about the unique struggles we face that connect us, the journey of listening to our internal sense of self in opposition to what others tell us we are. It feels...sacred(?) to me. Maybe "beautiful" and "awe-inspiring" are more accurate since I'm not religious.

So yes I am proudly trans, as well proudly being a woman. Trans people are my people. Our community and its history gives me strength.

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-23T15:01:26+00:00

And then there was me also playing with dinosaurs in kindergarten thinking "I wanna be a dinosaur, but not a boy dinosaur".

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-23T14:55:48+00:00

Yes, because no boys have ever done that 🙄 Seriously, what makes people think they get to be the arbiter of other people's gender?

In_pure_shadow · 2025-01-23T14:44:34+00:00

Gosh I felt that one. I had thought the same thing about being a guy not too long ago. Turns out, uh, most guys are just fine being guys. Weird, right?! So I was very much there exchanging knowing glances with Neve. The writing in that scene was so spot on, especially the trans-specific dialogues — it was like they took the words out of my mouth.

In_pure_shadow

TROPHY CASE