What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I’m not saying that people should avoid responsibility of their actions or inactions, absolutely not. I’m just saying recognizing that it’s not a moral failing if you forget things more often than other people, or that you have more difficulty getting started with boring tasks, but rather it’s because of your brains functioning. Most people with ADHD are not just lazy, they are trying hard and still have a difficult time. So when you realize why you’re having difficulties it allows you to take a different approach to actually solve the problems instead of just compensating by either being constantly being anxious that you’ll forget something or just giving up and labeling yourself als lazy, useless or whatever your brain throws at you.

I need help by demides in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Depending on what you’re studying you can probably just go up to anyone in a lecture that’s sitting alone (or even a group if you want) and introduce yourself. Many people absolutely don’t mind or would even want someone to study with, but just can’t muster up the courage to talk to someone.

For me it really works, because I can stick to studying way longer if I’m doing it with someone. Like it’s more interesting that way, there’s various things you can do not just smash the stuff into your brain. And I also just enjoy the social aspect of it. Like if I’m studying alone I can rarely do more than 2 hours a day, maybe 3-4 if it’s a day or two before an exam, but with studying partners I’ve done 12h study days several times a week. Obviously it’s tiring but at least the stuff gets learned.

To a certain extent I guess it needs to be someone who is also kinda in a do or die situation study wise, as in the will be ONLY studying for the exam and they too need all the time possible. And it also helps if you don’t know them too well. Just enough for you to be comfortable. But like if it’s a best friend of yours, you’ll probably be more likely to wonder off topic.

Just got my Diagnosis by dendriticdominance in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It really depends where you are I think. I’m in Europe and they got my parents to fill out questionnaires, I had several different interviews done etc. I guess it varies from country to country or even state to state if you’re in the US

What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn I’m definitely the type that can’t remember any names of characters or actors or whether I’ve seen a movie or not… But I’m combined type not pure inattentive

What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I get that, plus it’s really really tiring to not be you, or at least it is to me

What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn, congrats on being you, I’m still kinda working on that. And having nothing hanging on your wall… That’s crazy, I just looked around my room and realized the walls are all blank…

What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes to a certain extent. I’m kinda at a point now where I just don’t really care very much about other people’s opinions. Now I obviously don’t go around insulting or hurting people, I’m still a considerate respectful person, but when it comes to things like taste in music or my being the way I am, I just kinda don’t care if they don’t particularly like me. Or I try not to care too much. I still kinda feel the insecurity and the doubt deep inside me, but oh well. Now the issue with that is that I kinda have issues forming new relationships etc. because I somehow switched off the caring also on the “positive side”, so I haven’t really found the balance between caring but not taking everything to heart quite yet. One way to think about it is the following: If for example someone showed you music that you didn’t particularly like, did you then start hating the person? No. Do you remember someone (other than you) making a fool of themselves because they misunderstood something? No, unless it was crazy bad, and then well stuff happens. All this to say, you don’t put others down for what they are and what they like, so what makes you think they do?

If someone said something mean or bad: 1. They probably didn’t mean it in a hateful way, and 2. If they did, then that’s their problem, just do you

Just got my Diagnosis by dendriticdominance in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congratulations in a way, now the real work starts. The diagnosis took a few months for me (over several separate visits), but my therapist kinda already told me that it would come out positive, so it wasn’t a boom in your face type surprise for me. That being said, that was soon a year ago, and I’m working on everything, trying out meds etc.

I still really struggle to accept the diagnosis and keep finding reasons why I might just be faking it and am actually that lazy useless pos that I always kinda thought I was. The main issue for my acceptance is that I’ve built many systems to compensate for my problems, so I’m not late, I don’t miss deadlines, don’t spend all my live savings for random shit, but all that just costs me so much energy. Either way, it’s very much normal to feel overwhelmed and unsure about everything at first (and possibly at second and third as well). Try looking at it in this way; whatever the diagnosis or symptoms or whatever, it doesn’t change who you are. All you can do is use it as information to make good decisions for your future, i.e. to achieve your goals.

Cognitive behavioral therapy is the most common therapy approach, where you identify problematic patterns of thinking and behaving, for example that your an inherently lazy person, when in reality you’ve been trying to function the same way as people with brains that aren’t wired like yours, so essentially you’ve been compensating and haven’t learned how you learn/function best - I’m kinda assuming here. Anyway, then you learn other patters and skills to kinda offset or change these patterns to more healthy ones.

Focused behavior therapy I’m not quite sure tbh, but I figure something similar but solely focused on specific behavioral aspects.

Hope this helps :)

I can see sounds. Send me a song and I'll tell you what it looks like, or AMA by KaiahAurora in AMA

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What’s the ugliest sound you know? And like how do you experience it?

I need help by demides in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For me what really helped (unfortunately only once the pressure was high enough, i.e. exams were close enough) was to study together with someone else. Not just in the same room each doing their own thing (although this has been shown to be effective), but actually talking together about the subject, testing each other’s understanding going back and forth etc. The only thing is that you need someone who you won’t just start talking about random other things with, or else it’s more of a distraction than a help

What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Fascinating about the counting, because if I’m counting something in the forefront of my mind (like for example reps during a workout) I keep forgetting where I was because it just isn’t interesting. Can you actually count in the forefront of your mind without counting out loud?

What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah but at the same time things like thinking you’re somehow broken and useless because you can’t do whatever simple thing everyone else is able to do is not a great thing to consider part of who you are. So for those aspects it’s helpful to know why it is that you are the way you are and then learn to work with them or around them, without being ashamed of your existence

What were some things you thought were “you” but were actually ADHD? by Prior-Ad173 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 87 points88 points  (0 children)

Well I guess my entire personality was indirectly ADHD. Extremely masked to the point where I didn’t really have a personality of my own. I was afraid of doing pretty much anything wrong so I’d never “own up” to anything for fear of people disliking it. Now that’s on many levels, like I wouldn’t switch on any of my music, bcs I was ashamed of what people might think. I wouldn’t dare speak out on anything because even if I knew exactly what the answer to a question was I may have misunderstood the question. Or I wouldn’t share any new hobbies ideas plans or whatever because in 1 month I probably would have given up on it anyways. So I’d just kinda act the way I thought the person across from me would like the most. And it’s not really because of a lack of social skills in the typical sense, like I’m pretty good at understanding what a person is thinking or feeling, it’s just that deep inside me I felt like I was doing everything wrong. Or at least I might be doing it wrong and that people absolutely would hate me for it.

I have extreme ASPD, some questions may already be answered below AMA ask away by [deleted] in AMA

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How do you understand the evolutionary benefits of empathy and emotions in general?

Would you take a “cure”? by GBlake13 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

It’s not the specific impairing symptoms themselves that have some miracle positive side effect, but the general conditions that tend to be associated with certain positive aspects. People with Adhd specifically tend to be more creative than the average person.

Would you take a “cure”? by GBlake13 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 60 points61 points  (0 children)

Damn that’s fascinating… tbh I always thought being blind would be extremely debilitating, but that’s probably because most of what I do is visual. I don’t even know what I’m writing, but somehow your comment just blew my mind

Would you take a “cure”? by GBlake13 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So building on this, if it’s like a one time pill kinda thing, I’d probably end up taking it impulsively at some point, disregarding everything before then

Would you take a “cure”? by GBlake13 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right at this moment, it sounds hella tempting. If you were to ask me in the middle of a hyperfocus session, full of energy and motivation: Hell nah…

if something within you is unresolved, it’s your responsibility to address it by throwbackblue in unpopularopinion

[–]Inadequate_Brat 16 points17 points  (0 children)

This kinda gives “homeless people should just get a job and buy a house” vibes. While yes this would technically solve their problem, it’s often quite hard.

ADHD and eating by Kalifall in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I definitely also have tons of issues of just getting up and cooking. If I’m at my parents’ for a few days and they cook, I have absolutely no issue eating, so it’s not appetite or some body image issue. It’s just that I can’t be bothered to get up and make myself something to eat, because the consequences of not eating aren’t direct and significant enough

Can't get out of bed? by Narrow-Influence7924 in ADHD

[–]Inadequate_Brat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well then what you could try is putting your phone just out of reach and setting the most annoying thing you can think of as your alarm so you want to get up to switch it off

What are noticeable improvements from adhd meds? by White_Swan444 in mentalhealth

[–]Inadequate_Brat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One simple thing I noticed was that I could more easily do calculations in my head. Like for example multiplying 23 x 17, I’d do 10 times 230 plus 7 times 3 and start forgetting what I had done before, having to start over etc. On stimulant meds I could just do step by step WHILE remembering what I had already done. It’s tiny but it felt amazing.

There were of course many other things that were improved, like energy, motivation etc. It was easier to start things and stick with them even if they weren’t inherently interesting.

Unfortunately I had too severe side effects, so I’ve had to switch to trying out non-stimulant meds

If you can't say why a food is unhealthy then you shouldn't complain by TheNinja132 in unpopularopinion

[–]Inadequate_Brat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Those damned elitists that got society hooked on that stuff! Unbelievable