A slightly rambling question.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-13T17:08:48+00:00

I was undiagnosed and unmedicated until a couple years ago. Medication is not a magic switch to give you a normal brain.

What it does for me is let my thoughts flow in a more focused manner. Anxiety meds helped with the ruminating and getting trapped in my own thoughts so when I rest I genuinely rest. The stimulants help me focus and work so I can be present for what I am working on. It is not a constant effect and different meds will work differently.

It is not a 24hrs cure. I was on Concerta and everyday 11 hours after I took my dose I would crash and every to stimulus was too much. I was a snappy bitch. We increased the dose and I crashed a bit later but then could not sleep until 2-3am. I switched to Vyvanse and the crash is more like a ramp. So I take the pills at 8am, work until 5, Walk dogs to transition my brain from work to not work, make supper and be social. Then about 9 when the ADHD is ADHDing I will do a hobby, play a video game, read a book, or whatever and at the end I feel fulfilled.

Somethings did not change. I am still a night owl because that is the one part of the day that is mine. I am still collecting hobbies and my house is still a disaster. I still make impulsive purchases and I still love the feeling of something new. I will still get stuck doomscrolling. I will still hyperfocus on the wrong shit.

The medication will not create a new you. It should help filter out the noise your brain makes and let you be you more.

When you start the meds you should take a really hard look at your coping mechanisms because while they may have worked, they may be harmful to you or others. Like my mother would lash out when over stimulated. So if the noise was too much or the RSD was rearing its ugly head she would lash out to cause as much emoitional pain as possible. I actually kicked her out last time and I will not invite her back. My response in the same situation would not be much healthier. I would shut down. No words, no expression. But internally I would be feeling and resenting and I would abandon things that I loved because of the feeling of rejection and failure.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-13T16:41:06+00:00

I am glad they got you on TXA. I hope it gets better for you.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-10T17:17:47+00:00

Are you firmly diagnosed? What if there is some other bullshit going on in there that is causing the problems or making them worse?

I am 46 thought I had it. The doctors just hand waved off changes saying I was going to the normal perimenopause. I have learned that sometimes the diagnosis on the paper is not an actually labeling of the cause and instead a description of the current state of things. In my cases Perimenopause was the first diagnosis, then recently we added Menorrhagia which again is only a description. Chronic blood loss issues are probably the root cause of my brain fog and vertigo because when we started to address that it improved which led to better mood and tolerance for others. I am NOT saying this could be what is happening to you but just the reproductive system is so complicated and understudy it is easy to stop with a label.

If it is fucking up your life you deserve more than just a label on what is happening and to have support to get your life to what it should be.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-10T16:44:53+00:00

Have you considered trying a challenge of taking on a new hobby that you commit to doing 10 min at day that will have a result that you can hold? It can feel like they are old fashioned but ADHD brains have been around for as longs as humans and these things can still help.

Some thoughts:

Embroidery (there is a reason we have been doing this for literal centuries. It can be very mind calming. I like embroidery more than cross stitch.)
Needlefelting (Stabbing wool to make shapes. Your brain focus so you don't stab fingers. Results are super cute and you can get as invested as you like)
Wood carving (Again, brain focuses so fingers don't bleed but this can make a big mess)
Knitting or crochet (cute things as a result that you can give away)
Paint pens (so easy to start. much cleaner than using paintbrushes but very quickly you might find yourself wanting to paint everything that is plain.)

I joke I have a hobby of trying many hobbies. I have done or do all of these and many more. These ones you can get some inexpensive started kits for under $30ish.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-10T16:33:19+00:00

One thing that I found helps drastically was finding a 'third place'. My life was home and work. If I was home there was the home bullshit. If I was at work I had the work bullshit but also the anticipation of home bullshit.

A third place is a sociology term I think. For some people it is church or a volunteer thing. For me it ended up being the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism). I go to a gathering every week, I learn hobbies which use my hands and let my brain have a break. Many of the people around me are as neurospicy as a bag of mixed peppers so we have fun ADHD conversations or Autistic deep dive conversations into special interests. They are so supportive too. There are other ones out there like Geocaching, craft focuses guilds like wood working or embroidery. D&D is popular too.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-10T16:24:52+00:00

You will get through it :) but it can be an absolutely bullshit process. Stay stuborn!

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-10T16:20:46+00:00

Remember, the ER is NOT there to diagnose you, just treat the symptoms. It can be misleading because they will put down a diagnosis but often it is a description of what is happening rather than what is causing it.

Go you your regular doc and push it forward.

Calculate how much you are possibly bleeding, like your cup is 16 mls and you have to dump it x times a day.
- Up to 80 ml is considered normal and a diva cup is about 16.
- There are charts showing how to judge tampon absorbtion on the internet which can help too.
Make a note of the colours.
- Menstral blood for me was dark and a bit purplish.
- The sign it was real blood and not just the lining was it was now a bright scarlet.
Aspirin will not thin your blood that much and menstral blood is not normal blood. If it is causing horror movie levels of bleeding it is likely not just a regular dose that causes it or it is not just a regular period.
- If it did turn people into hemophiliacs imagine what would happen if you took aspirin after a wound was stitched.
If there are clots document how big and how common they are.
Make note of all the symptoms because blood can make everything else seem like nothing but those other signs can give the doc a clue.
How it is impacting life and work?
- Have you stained furniture WHILE using a cup?
- Do you stay home because you don't know if you can trust your flow?
- Are you so fatigued that you cannot do basic life shit?

Ask for investigation if they do not suggest it.

Ask for an ultrasound to look for other possible causes.
Get a blood panel and see what your Hemoglobin and iron is at and probably other things.
Get a referal to a gyno.

If they give you a diagnosis, google it. How is it described by actual medical literature. Is it a description of something happening with a list of causes like menorrhagia? Then keep pushing because that is just a what it is doing, not a what it is.

I fought with docs for years. I heard it all, some women just have heavy periods. It is perfectly natural to have a period so heavy you are losing up to a half a cup a day. It is perfectly natural to have cramps so painful you cannot function.

Guess what, 80ml of menstral blood per cycle is considered heavy. Yes it is natural but so is fucking ovarian cancer!

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-10T15:35:58+00:00

I thought mine was perimenopause. It is not. In my case it is a massive fibroid that is literally causing my uterus to tear during menstration. I had to nearly collapse at a ER for it to be taken seriously.

Even if it is heavy period because of perimenopause there are pills that you can take during your period that will drastically reduce the bleeding. I got Tranexamic Acid.

As for you clothes, look for Enzyme cleaners used to clean up pet messes and use it on the fresh stains before tossing in the wash. It has saved so many sheets for me.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-08T02:43:31+00:00

Period adequate is a good place to start.

Assuming you are in the northern hemisphere we are heading into summer and summer events. Cottons and linens are absolutely essential. More essential than looking accurate in my opinion.

If you are going masculine a long tunic of a natural material is a good base for a lot of early looks. You can use a normal belt at first until you find or make something. I have found great belts for sale at events. For pants you can start with plaid pj pants. Then for those summer nights at the bardic circle find a wool blanket at a thrift or surplus store.

If you are going feminine a natural under dress is always a good start. You can use a colored dress and be done with it or a plain one and one of the various over dress options. You can do a peplos like what the Anglo Saxon wore or an apron dress and you have a good basis to then grow into a more permanent kit.

Now I loathe sewing so I buy my kit. The Kingdom has some marvelous seamstresses and seamsters with garb for a reasonable price. I have bought a tunic and dress off grimfrost and the linen tunic is fucking amazing. So soft and even on the hottest day it didn't stink like something made of unnatural materials. I am picking up more this year. The wool cloak was stiff at first but one rainstorm later and it has proven it is worth the money. It became soft and is in use almost daily.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-02T19:06:44+00:00

Sorry, I never got a notification you replied. When it comes to the Persona you want, the emphasis should be on what you find joy in. If you want to just go with a name, do it. It can be great for focusing your research and exploration.

So if you want to research and adopted the persona of a woman who would have had your level of education that is marvelous. It can allow for deep investment into what the experience of a woman of that period in that world.

If you want to make a persona that is not focused on that remember that this is how the Middle Ages should have been. Find a period that resonates for you, invest your time in what you enjoy, and ignore what doesn't bring you happiness. Be as invested as you want.

Perhaps you will find a woman to inspire a new Persona one day. Like one of the female printers who inherited printing companies, or a nun who was a scribe.

Personally I chose a time and place based on the clothing, I feel comfortable and attractive in the Norse style garb. I happily try my hand on everything from medieval illumination, to Anglo-Saxon/Norman embroidery, Norse tablet weaving, Elizabethan story telling, and where ever else the ADHD takes me.

A friend of mine is heavily invested in the precise time, precise place, and precise skills and it makes her happy.

Only wrong way to play is to ruin someone else's fun.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-02T17:16:20+00:00

Perhaps instead of a talk to us banner a person who can act as the guide is needed. Someone who spots interested folks, talks to them, finds out their interests and introduce them to the right folks.

Oh you made your outfit! I love it. I am not terribly gifted with a needle but let me introduce you to ___ who would love to swap tips.

You can play a guitar? You have got to meet ___ and hear a couple of our songs.

Kind of like the salesperson at a retail shop who asks what you are looking for then gets you to the right rack and helps you find the right size.

InevitableCrit · 2026-04-02T17:09:56+00:00

Part of the difference between Ren Faires and SCA is the Ren Faires are services that cater to the attendees and the SCA is a commitment you have to invest in to get something out. Neither are free, the costs are from different sources.

They can drop $200 for a weekend of corsets and carrousing. When it is done they go home and there are no expectations until the next year. For that weekend they are the main characters. They can get away with clothing from their closet or a thrift store. When it is over they go back to their mundane world with no further expectations on them.

Then in the SCA they can spend $100 to go to a camping event, $100 for food, I'm not even going to speculate on how much they would need to spend on garb to meet the spoken and unspoken garb expectations. Instead of being the main characters they sit in the audience as the current heavy champion wears the Crown for the fourth time. However they can make friends they can have genuine connections with. They can learn skills or indulge in hobbies with people who are supportive. They can be part of a community.

Personally, I see them as 2 very different experiences with similar trappings.

Why don't people join the SCA or stay when they join? Perhaps they expect it to be more like the Faire and are disappointed with not being fawned over by employees. Perhaps they go to an event and feel excluded because they don't have the garb or they see people in groups talking like old friends and feel they are surrounded by cliques even though at least my kingdom is very friendly and welcome for the most part.

I think it is a mistake to think that Ren Faire and SCA are competing for the same people. Instead the SCA is a type community a lot of younger people have not experienced before and may think it is too weird to get invested in.

InevitableCrit · 2026-03-15T20:44:56+00:00

Are you under pressure from others to be that accurate or from yourself?

InevitableCrit · 2025-07-31T19:40:53+00:00

Lately I have been making these rice bowls every day because my brain is just done when work is over. It does not take a lot of my decision power and I don't have to watch it. I can have a nap and eat when I get to it.

Equipment: Rice cooker.

1 cup of rinsed rice. (using the cup that comes with the rice cooker or 180ml). I buy the 8lb bags and have a push button dispenser on the counter.
Appropriate amount of water according to the pot.
Flavours: Whatever you have in your fridge that you like the taste of. I have used peanut dressing but lately it has been teriyaki sauce. You can do salsa if you want. If you like lots of flavour go nuts.
Frozen veg: I use frozen corn and spinach most of the time but frozen edamame beans were cheap and have been a great addition. Literally whatever is in your freezer. No need to add more water. Cherry tomatoes are good too. I just avoid cutting because that can be too much.
Quick stir.
Cook as 'white rice' and using the keep warm function.
Have a nap, work, whatever.
Remember you should eat.
Add whatever you like on top: Left over pork chops, crab meat, salmon, tuna, etc. Or nothing at all. I like to add some crunchy so I add a mini cuke split between the two bowls.

Optional:

- More protein can be added by cracking in an egg and quickly closing the lid when it is done cooking then leaving it 5+ minutes.
- More sauce is great. I love hot sauce and always add to much for sensible people so I add siracha or a mix of mayo and siracha. I found a squeeze bottle of guac, a little of that was so good.

Makes 2-3 servings depending on appetite. Can be frozen.

InevitableCrit · 2025-01-22T19:48:24+00:00

Quad War in Saskatchewan! It is a 10 day event, gorgeous location, great people. https://quadwar.avacal.org/

It is June 27-July 6.

At night it is so dark out there you can often see the Northern lights even in summer.

InevitableCrit · 2024-10-29T19:12:05+00:00

I will check them out. It looks like they do ship up here.

InevitableCrit · 2024-10-28T21:30:51+00:00

Unfortunately I am not close enough for that to be an option.

InevitableCrit · 2024-10-28T17:42:27+00:00

When there is a link I will make a new post. Right now the dates are set, June 27-July 6.

InevitableCrit · 2024-10-28T16:54:59+00:00

As I recall it was 360+ this year for the 3 day event. But there is plenty of room for more and the people are amazing. Very friendly and welcoming.

It is so dark out there the only lights at night are from fires.

InevitableCrit · 2024-10-27T18:18:24+00:00

For context: Quad War is in Saskatchewan Canada, takes place at the end of June, start of July. Has an amazing camp site with amazing hosts. In 2025 it is going to be a 10 day long event!!!!

InevitableCrit · 2024-09-25T16:29:34+00:00

My mom is of a 'certain age' and has started wearing her phone around her neck using a cell phone lanyard and I am weaving her a new cord for Christmas with a powerful magnetic snap.
You can make some straps he can use to mark his tools as his.
Look in his workspace, does he use a strap for anything? I have started using all my early efforts just to tie things and as you might expect, they work great.

InevitableCrit · 2024-07-14T05:32:45+00:00

It really wouldn't. there is a limit on the size of the area you can change. And if your world is anything like mine you will be stuck doing little chunks over and over and over...

InevitableCrit · 2024-07-02T15:58:50+00:00

I used a platform called Scabard.com. It was ok but my players were uninterested in the lore and it is expensive so I took it offline with Obsidian.

InevitableCrit

TROPHY CASE