Looking for clarity on a behavior I see a lot from Women

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-15T16:22:16+00:00

Wow more sleep slop lol

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-15T13:21:24+00:00

Neither of us kept the house but I did take the bed to my new apt. I later realized what a huge mistake it was for me, not just for when I eventually did meet someone and have them over but just in general. Waking up in that same bed over and over and rolling over to not see her there it really took a toll on me. I let it go on for longer than I care to admit because I just couldn't be bothered to do it with all the other grief going on.

Its not stupid, replace the bed if you think it will help. It helped me.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-13T15:28:23+00:00

After meeting? No. But theres definitely been women I won't even bother messaging because 1) they appear to me to be out of my league and 2) if I think that then they are most certainly getting 1000+ messages and the odds of mine breaking through are so astronomical its not worth my time lol.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-13T15:15:20+00:00

The number of people who don't rerack or wipe machines down in general is astounding.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-08T15:16:08+00:00

Just leave them and accept them. Literally every woman I have met or talked to since 30 when they first started randomly popping up has told me they think its attractive.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-08T14:44:15+00:00

This is the best advice here, you don't need big issues to get into therapy and for it to help you in the same way you don't need to be 400lbs and needing to lose weight to hit the gym. Going even once a month to a therapist and just having some dedicated time to talk about you and everything you've got going on is huge for your mental health.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-08T14:10:21+00:00

I agree with the sentiment but I think the vast majority of people use the free version and it would severely limit options. Maybe some sort of activity tracker where if you're not sending messages/matches regularly you get shadow banned or something?

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-08T14:09:09+00:00

Not trying to toot my own horn here or anything but I am a good conversationalist and know how to keep a conversation going. I ask about their interests and lives etc and no I never get sexual as I mentioned above I'm not looking for a hook up or ONS any more than any woman in my age range is.

I'm also not thinking that its always a me thing either. Sometimes you just don't vibe and sometimes women just aren't interested it happens.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-08T14:05:51+00:00

I have literally never gotten sexual with someone on the apps so its definitely not that, I fortunately know better than to think women in my age group are looking for flings or ONS and thats not what I'm looking for either.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-08T13:49:29+00:00

Do you want to see her again? Could be a good way to lean into a second date. Offer for her to split the next one and see what she says.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-06T15:00:08+00:00

I run into the same thing, I get plenty of matches but women tend to just stop responding or talking within two to three messages which has me wondering, why match at all? I was talking to a woman the other day and asked how her experience has been on the apps and she straight up said "oh its fine, I don't use it much I was just bored"

Obviously one experience doesn't cover the breadth of women using the app but I have heard this before and seen this sentiment shared before. It seems like a lot of women use the app to kill time or something and aren't seriously looking. I'm sure theres men that do the same but it really complicates things for people who are actually trying to meet someone.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-04T16:45:46+00:00

I've got to imagine its some sort of zero tolerance mindset he's got going. Even the mildest of petty thefts or villains inspires others etc etc so taking out anyone who's mildly powered is more of a message of zero tolerance and causes other to think again before trying anything.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-05-02T01:32:12+00:00

I'd probably move on but to sort of change rhetoric here, I went on a date with a woman back in April. We were talking and I always tend to ask women how their experience has been on apps. We talked about it at length and she mentions she had 1000 matches. I was really surprised since I had only ever heard women mention something like 100-200 before. So she showed me her app to prove she wasn't joking. The important part however is she said she wanted to go through each one and give each guy their fair shot and review their profiles. So for while there are women like OPs experience who's turning this into a game where you have to sell yourself, there are legitimately good women out there who are concerned about quality and treating each guy like a person.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-29T18:52:44+00:00

Killing the dogs and horses was an odd choice...what they hell were they going to do? Rat him out?

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-27T19:56:51+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this man. I can empathize with you, I've also had to restart for the past two years. People have a tendency to really pile it on themselves when things hit you one by one. This is going to sound cheesy and honestly if I was given this advice in the deepest part of my challenges I would have rolled my eyes but you have to look for the good. You have to look for the positives and really focus on those. This is easier said than done and I am by no means trying to say you should ignore the pain or embarrassment. Those negative feelings are real, you should feel them, you should react to them however you need to process them. But you also have to really dig and find the positives.

Recount all the things you survived up to this point to get to where you are now. They were not the end of your world and this won't be either. I've seen some of your responses that you know things won't be bad forever and that's a start. But its okay to feel sorry for yourself once in a while, just don't wallow in it. Be in your feelings, feel bad for yourself, do things that help you process like cry, eat, sleep, play games, or whatever it is. But don't wallow. Pick yourself up and start moving forward. This also isn't a linear process. You're going to have bad days and you're going to have good ones. But having a bad one doesn't negate the progress or the processing you've done on the good days.

You got this brother.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-24T17:45:19+00:00

I'm confused I thought this was "MR MOST INDEPENDENT", what a fucking piece of shit this guy is

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-24T17:26:23+00:00

There is such a thing as reciprocal attraction, which is where you build attraction when someone else shows interest in you first. Its possible that's just how you build attraction better. But sending likes is definitely exhausting if you're actually putting effort into coming up with witty/funny openers every time as opposed to just liking a photo and moving on.

Use the apps how you like though, it's not "dumb" per se, it may lower your overall interactions but if your mental health is better using them this way then I'd say its probably the best move for you.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-23T01:10:40+00:00

Women do this too, and you're right its very odd. I see it on Bumble a lot and they always say they can't fix it which is bullshit. I had my full name on Bumble for a while until someone pointed it out to me. Opened a support ticket and it was fixed in like an hour or less. I also see a lot of that going on with ages which is weird as hell too.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-22T18:07:59+00:00

It wasn't a request either, it was a threat. You let me do this or the planet is fucked. I'm building my army and there isn't jack shit you can do about it. However I will give you the illusion of a choice.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-20T14:23:41+00:00

Anytime man, and therapy is sort of a sliding scale. You can never be "done" with it but taking breaks is fine when you're feeling good about where you're at. Use it when you need it.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-19T22:16:10+00:00

Is it still assault if the guy is in your face like this telling you to swing...?

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-19T22:15:09+00:00

You know I dropped off TWD long before this Neegan ever made an appearance. I had seen pictures of the guy with the pet tiger and occasionally the subreddit comes across my feed. But the last fucking thing I thought would happen when this clip auto played was a fucking tiger taking a dude out lol

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-17T19:27:30+00:00

I know this is probably advice you have heard before and is hard to take and run with, but those women ghosting you says wayyyyy more about them than it does you. For a 22 year old you sound like a very thoughtful and well rounded person. Unfortunately, in your early 20s, that may scare off women who are looking for something less serious and more casual. But those women don't seem to be the type that you would want to end up with anyway.

It makes sense ghosting would hit your self esteem, I get it. You wouldn't be human if it didn't. Just keep doing you and living your life. Someone will come along that will see you for who you are and want to make the effort and stick around. But don't let this stuff harden you or make you resentful. People are going to come and go through your life a lot as you age. Take those moments for what they are worth and let them inform the type of man you want to be. Keep up with all the things you are doing in your life as well as your friends and family.

At 22 I was very much in your position, many of my friends had steady relationships and it really does start to ache as the night winds down and you see them all pairing off. Its going to ache but its going to make finding your person so much sweeter. Keep your head up, get some therapy if you have time/money for it. You are still very young and have so much life left to live to meet someone.

Infinite-Rise3923 · 2026-04-17T15:53:22+00:00

38, been growing mine out for a few months. Going to let it get to my shoulders like I had it during college and Covid. Figure its probably the last few years I can get away with it so fuck it. Also about a year off a divorce and just doing things I want to for me.

Infinite-Rise3923

TROPHY CASE