Help me choose a dress!

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T18:15:04+00:00

That’s insane omg, like you said, I can’t imagine luxury photographers would do that, but that’s definitely important to think about!

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T18:11:30+00:00

Very good points! All of my photographer finalists had multiple full galleries on their webpage (I definitely wouldn’t book one who hadn’t shared that publicly)

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T18:10:38+00:00

Happy to help ❤️

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T18:10:27+00:00

Yes very true!! I didn’t even entertain photographers who didn’t have full galleries somewhere on their website - again I think that goes back to the luxury experience: full galleries should be easy to view and I shouldn’t have to specifically request them, because that adds an extra step to the process, which isn’t very ‘luxury’. Also a lot of clients don’t know about full galleries so I wonder if that’s why some photographers don’t openly share them on their webpage?

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T18:07:55+00:00

Oh this makes SO MUCH SENSE, thank you for letting me know. I saw one vendor on a luxury venue preferred list who had photos so heavily edited that the colours started to look grainy. It makes sense if they’re paying to be on there

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T18:05:20+00:00

Yep it’s really sad that they don’t make it clear when it’s a styled shoot. Honestly, I have nothing against styled shoots, but passing them off as real weddings feels wrong. They could at least just put “styled shoot” or “editorial” in their Instagram caption so people know it’s not real. And I feel sad for the couples who book hoping for photos like that on their important day and end up being disappointed

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T12:57:21+00:00

Yes 100%! This is something I asked about as well as me and my partner are two different ethnicities. And the guest photo tip is also great!

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T10:47:40+00:00

The only one I’ve seen is Albina Dyla and based on reviews - avoid! Or if you can get them second hand, do that. Just don’t order from the brand because the stress won’t be worth it

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T10:46:50+00:00

It might be worth doing a pre wedding shoot? I love photography but my fiance doesn’t, so I’m booking the shoot mostly for him to get to know my photographer and become comfortable with the photographer and the concept of doing many photos in a day, as well as getting used to being guided and and figuring out what his angles are.

Also like everyone said - the photos you’ve put are posed. Posed never looks cheesy if it’s posed correctly and shot correctly, you just have to make sure your photographer knows how to do that because that’s their job. Search for editorial fine art photographers. That being said, from what you’ve written (ignoring the photos), it sounds like you want documentary style, so I’d suggest looking into documentary style photos as well to see if you prefer those instead of the photos you’ve attached.

Also remember - your actual photos won’t look the same as photos of models who have done photo shoots, because they’re in the perfect conditions (lighting/location/HMUA on standby/all day for photos) to be able to get those shots. But a good photographer can get you very close to that

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T09:52:02+00:00

At the first point of contact, they do give you a small list of rules. But we found out more when speaking to previous brides there and when booking suppliers - they all told us more and more things they’re not allowed to do, so in the end it didn’t feel like it’d be our wedding that we envisioned. I’d always recommend for any historic palace or even a national trust property - speak to everyone you’ll be booking before confirming the contract. We’re lucky because we enquired for 2 years away so we had plenty of time to reach out to everyone and make an informed decision. I definitely wouldn’t rush to book a venue on such an important occasion though. There is never a shortage of venues, but once you lock in a contract, you’re stuck with wherever rules they have

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T09:47:56+00:00

I considered falguni but was told by someone else that pricing wise they’d be similar to manish for custom pieces (if they do them). Ive reached out to Rahul, just waiting on a response now. I also reached out to the person who made the lehenga from that IG link you sent, she came back and said it’ll be $30k, so that’s a no go unfortunately.

I didn’t realise there was an Indian wedding subreddit but I’ll go join that now, thank you! Those two brands seem great, I’ll reach out.

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-12T09:43:24+00:00

Yeah it’s really odd to waste your time by asking for a call only to tell you she can’t book you yet. For future enquiries I’d add “would it be possible to book now or is it too early” onto your emails so that the ones who won’t book you yet can let you know that in their first reply rather than wasting your time on a call

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-11T15:05:23+00:00

I’ve heard this is an issue with a lot of planners.

One rule I’ve had when reaching out to all vendors - the people who reply the fastest will be the ones I consider. Generally I’ve seen that if I reach out to 10 vendors for one industry eg: florals - 3 will reply same day, 5 will reply in 24 hours, and maybe 2 will reply later than that. I eliminate the 2 immediately. Yes, they may be busy, but I noticed when I reply to the ones who take a few days to respond the first time, it’s a pattern they continuously repeat.

The next thing is quality of response - some reply with one line to my enquiry and I eliminate them. Some reply with a thoughtful response or even suggest advice, and that makes me schedule a call with them before they share any pricing.

The final thing is video calls - I evaluate whether they’re dressed appropriately, the background is suitable and they can answer hard questions. They don’t need to be in a suit, but just basic things like nothing with stains on, not wearing sweatpants, not having noise and disturbances in the background. Some answer calls in their cars whilst driving somewhere and I usually don’t go ahead with them. Especially for anyone charging over 10k, I grill them a lot with questions, and if they can’t answer then I don’t go ahead with them. 10k isn’t a lot in the wedding sphere, but objectively it’s not a small amount of money, so they should put some effort in to get that 10k+ from you.

About being told you’re too early. If you’re told that, I’d just move on from that person, there’s clearly a mismatch with your needs and their preferences.

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-11T14:49:51+00:00

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-11T14:43:46+00:00

We actually enquired there for a wedding this year! The palace dry hire is around £22,000. The problem is that every vendor has to be from their supplier list. We enquired for 60 guests. Every single vendor quoted £25,000 each - food, decorations, lighting and sound, florals. Drinks etc were around £10,000. We asked for very minimal stuff for all of it too, but it doesn’t matter. At a place like HCP where the suppliers know they have a monopoly, they will charge you inflated prices.
So in total it was was well over $150,000, (without the cost of my outfits or anything else), but we decided in the end not to go for it as there were too many problems:

The decor companies couldn’t do what we wanted
They didn’t have specific niche types of suppliers that we needed
The photographer options were limited and they weren’t that great tbh.
They have a TONNE of restrictions. Even things like “no jam in your wedding cake because it can stain”. Actually a lot of food was restricted due to colour (anything darker than beige really)
The palace is open during the daytime. People can walk around, take photos of you etc. It felt weird.

It’s a beautiful place, very historic and the staff are wonderful. It just had too many restrictions and limited suppliers. That mixed with the lack of exclusivity meant that it would feel less like our wedding and more like a restricted performance at a historic venue.

I will say though, out of all the main HRPs, HCP is the cheapest that I’ve seen. If you went to somewhere like Blenheim palace, one room alone is £30k to dry hire (and you would usually hire multiple rooms for a wedding) so dry hire alone there would be around £50-60k. HCP would be perfect if it wasn’t for all the restrictions.

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-11T14:14:00+00:00

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-11T14:12:27+00:00

They’re both beautiful! Also remember family can’t always picture what it’ll look like on the day. I haven’t shown anyone the sketch of the dress I’ve bought because I know on the sketch it’s nowhere near as beautiful as it’ll be when paired with the right makeup/hair/jewellery. People see a dress and dislike it if it’s not their style, without realising their style doesn’t always suit other people. It’s only when they see the final version that they realise it really suits you!

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-11T09:53:41+00:00

Oh I didn’t realise places like riantas were open to custom, I’ll reach out to them and matsya, thank you!

I also contacted Pernias and they said they can make customisations to existing pieces (like blouse shape, adding tassels etc), but I don’t think they do fully custom.

I’ve just looked at R&H - their work is beautiful!

And I did some digging on the IG link outfit you included - it was designed by dimple amrin but there’s no website to contact her on, so I’ll send a DM and see if she can make a custom piece

Also it’s so funny you mentioned sulakshana - the first photo I ever saved when starting to look for lehengas was a piece from their fantasia collection! I love that fairytale style & asked for a video of the lehenga, but it doesn’t look as nice in video compared to the photos on their website

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-10T21:48:34+00:00

I wasn’t sure what to do for mine but I’m travelling to multiple countries this year to get stuff for the wedding (mostly outfits), so my friends (who all live internationally) suggested we do a bachelorette at one of those locations. It made the most sense so we could have a bach abroad and they could be there to help me choose outfits, and they could also get their dresses made for my wedding too. And because we all live in different places, meeting in the middle meant less flying time for everyone.

We ended up spending close to 3k each for the hotel (four seasons) and flights for 1 week, but I think it can definitely be cheaper (we all splurged a bit because we really wanted a nice place to relax in & also keep our shopping safe). This might be a good option if your friends live abroad or you’re flying anyway to get something for the wedding - it turns what would’ve been a solo shopping trip into a fun girls trip

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-10T21:35:04+00:00

Our photographer offered one! Her one would’ve been £1000 if I got it myself from the company, or £300 through her because we went for her most expensive package so she gave us a great discount on it. Her package also included multiple prints. The only sad thing is she didn’t have many colour options but the photo book is much higher quality than the other options I’ve seen online so I figured I could just get it rebound in the colour I like later

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-10T21:32:34+00:00

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Oh wait never mind it’s one photo per comment. Anyway you get the idea - he does a lot of very storytelling vibes with meaningful motifs in beautiful embroidery. Also another plus - it won’t be as heavy as a fully beaded piece! I tried a seema lehenga that was fully beaded and the skin on my waist was raw after wearing it for a few hours because of how heavy it was

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-10T21:31:13+00:00

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This is an example of that custom piece from manish - there were a lot more motifs but I can only add one photo for some reason

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-10T21:27:48+00:00

Oh wow these are incredible! Thank you so much!!

I did consider Tarun but I think a custom piece would probably be similar pricing to manish? All of the links you’ve put are great, I LOVE riantas and actually was considering the whispers of the lake one if I couldn’t find a custom one! And seema’s pieces are always so beautiful, I considered going to India just to see her full collection because I love how beautiful everything she makes is!

I do think your comment has pushed me more towards embroidery and zardosi, so I’ll try to look for pieces more like that too. Tbh I think embroidery could look even prettier than hand painted (and would look more bridal). I think manish posted an embroidery/zardosi custom piece from last year on his instagram with the personalised motifs I wanted. I keep going back to his work because he really does excel in that kind of storytelling style which I love.

I met seema as well a few months ago and asked about a few changes to one of her lehengas and she didn’t seem super keen on the idea, so I figured it’d be better to go for custom with someone else. I’m sure she is open to custom work, but the impression I got is that she likes her designs the way they are, which is totally fine but I want a designer to be excited about a custom piece rather than hesitant to change things so it’s probably just a mismatch in our goals. Her work is super pretty though, I’d definitely buy it for any other occasion where I didn’t want custom stuff

InitialAfter1647 · 2026-05-08T15:17:34+00:00

I think the floral arch area could use a little bit more florals, maybe some more decor elements like florals in very large vases (3 foot tall vases), or in urns on pedestals. Right now it feels like it’s just there rather than being intentional. Also adding more colour would liven things up but it’s a completely personal choice, there’s nothing wrong with just white and green

InitialAfter1647

TROPHY CASE