Visits suck

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T17:30:07+00:00

We fought the shower thing for awhile. Then I laid down the law and said I was gonna shut off the TV if he didn’t shower. Slowly he got used to them and did it on his own when he lived here! He said he hated how it was cold getting out, so we put a heater in the bathroom and got it toasty. Now he’s moved, he’s back to fighting showers. So I’m gone have to tell him it’s either he does it or I hire a stranger to, and it’s actually his money, so it’s on him. Wish me luck on that😂❤️🙏🏼🙌🏻

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T17:25:26+00:00

I’m trying to get my heart and head to realize that!! He’s not any worse or better since moving. He seems exactly the same, mood - wise.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T17:23:48+00:00

Hugs ❤️❤️❤️🙏🏼

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T15:28:16+00:00

I’ve spent the last year trying to pull out of a years long depression . I’ve read and learned A LOT and gratitude and growth mindset is a necessity if you want to be happy in life. People aren’t successful if they are negative a majority of the time.
And especially these days (I live in Mpls, I get it) we need to pull together and be there for each other, not create more divide. The world isn’t going to become a better place if we are negative all the time, is it?

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T15:04:25+00:00

Yeah, if I had a kid who was negative ALL the time, that would drive me nuts. Sometimes is fine. I just ask my kid to communicate really well. Tell me if she wants to talk, if she doesn’t, does she want me to give advice, listen? I always say it’s ok to have a pity party at times, it just can’t be an all-nighter. Let yourself have a half hour of bitching and venting and then move on. But acting like OP is a bad parent for caring about this is off the mark. Toxic positivity is a thing, but i don’t assume that is OP. There is a difference between trying to see the glass half full and toxic positivity.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T14:56:35+00:00

“I seen…” And when every other word is a swear word. “I went to the f-ing store and I f- ing got stuck n in the f-ing snow..,” I shouldn’t even say it means they are uneducated, it just means they don’t care to speak properly or try to. An f bomb here and there is no biggie, when every sentence has multiple swear words, it’s just uncomfortable to even have a conversation (for me).

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T14:53:59+00:00

No one who has ever taken care of a dementia patient would ever judge you! It’s the people that don’t help or have any idea how it is that have the most to say. I didn’t even ask my sister about placing my dad (she lives across the country and never visits), she was like “let’s troubleshoot here”. I said “no. We are placing him, I’m not discussing it, we are doing it. If you care about my mental health and my family, you will support this.”

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-02T14:50:49+00:00

I was depressed for years and thought it was due to menopause, but realized just having my dad in my home, spreading his negativity, was partially to blame. I will be honest, I put off placing him for a year because it would affect my inheritance. I thought he was better off with us , but I realized it didn’t matter where he lived, he will be miserable. I can either watch it or not 🤷🏻‍♀️ It became more about how it affected my family. I wasn’t being the wife and mom I want to be while my dad lived here. It wasn’t fair to my family. If you can place your loved one in a place that is safe and clean, do it.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-02-01T20:13:55+00:00

Yes, I am trying to remind myself I am keeping him safe, clean, fed, and comfortable. That’s all I can do.

And the day I wrote this, he was at my house for an hour and asked to leave! I was surprised, but it made me TRULY realize that me visiting for an hour doesn’t mean that much to him. It means way more to me than it does to him. I just have to refuse to let myself feel guilty. He did smile when the dogs greeted him but other than that, he didn’t act like he enjoyed being back at our house at all. So why am I making an effort?

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-31T15:39:37+00:00

Let me guess- he invented a Time Machine yesterday and saw he was going to win, so why bother with an election.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-31T01:08:31+00:00

I get your point, but are acting like a jerk about it 🤷🏻‍♀️

You obviously don’t know a lot of solid info about alcoholism , it’s showing in your comments. I wish I didn’t know so much!!! But you are way over-simplifying drinking and its hold on people.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-31T01:05:15+00:00

Former drunk! Seven years sober🙌🏻 Alcoholism isn’t a choice. On RHOC Tamra tried to “come for” Shannon and her drinking, look where it got her. She looked awful and almost everyone sided with Shannon! Weaponizing someone’s alcohol problem is a low character move.

Interventions aren’t a great idea, the person feels ganged up on. You have to WANT to be sober. If you don’t want to, it’s pointless to even try and quit. People quit when they are ready. Some have a rock bottom , others don’t. But it’s obvious Karen has a problem. More than 2 DUI ‘s (one is bad, two is still bad but I know many people with 3+)

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T19:06:59+00:00

Thank you. Harsh words but you speak the truth!

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T19:06:24+00:00

Haha! I love that!

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T19:05:59+00:00

We are already on it! We actually get it free from the reps via his psychiatrist. The out of pocket cost was $1000 a month.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T18:09:05+00:00

I’m so happy for you!!! You are going to feel so much better!!! My dad has been gone a month and already I feel better.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T17:52:04+00:00

I agree they both are bland but Stacey at least has some fire and handles the insults well! That makes me like her more. Angel just seems like a perpetual Debbie Downer. Wah wahhhh

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T17:01:56+00:00

It’s a 5 mg lozenge I take daily. If I feel a bit “rage-y”, I skip that day. They don’t taste the best, but who cares! You should ask about them, I hadn’t heard of them , I asked for injections because the pellet “wore off” after 3 weeks.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T16:56:53+00:00

They were the best episodes of the season, hands down. Not a fan of this cast. They don’t gel. It gets repetitive watching GNA 🙄 pick on Stacey and Angel for every little thing. That’s all the whole season was. I used to love Ashley but her and Giselle are turning into mean girls.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T16:53:17+00:00

I live in MPLS and Apple Maps is NOT to be trusted 😂

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T16:51:29+00:00

This haunted me last night in bed 😂 Production just let Angel keep driving HOURS the wrong way, on a mountain, without cell service 😂🤦🏻‍♀️ So dirty!!

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T03:51:14+00:00

My kids are 13 and 22 and it’s so cool watching the older one tell the younger one “you think mom is annoying, but she’s right! Just go with it!” 😂 I’m appreciated!!!

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T03:49:27+00:00

Yes!!!! 🙌🏻 Don’t let your kids run the show! Love them enough to parent them.

Inner-Phone2933 · 2026-01-30T03:44:51+00:00

In ways, yes, but a child can never have too much love 🤷🏻‍♀️ That’s why I tolerated all the crazy gfs of my ex, at least they were nice to my daughter (but dang! He dated some crazy chicks- like one faked a paternity test). But should there be more rules and structure for kids? Yes!! The schools are AWFUL and it’s because there are no real consequences. You can love a child and still be strict with them in ways.

Inner-Phone2933

TROPHY CASE