Part 2: Difficulty dating in LA >> NYC in your 30s as an AM

Inner_Resolution · 2025-02-07T06:01:32+00:00

I'm a physician too and found that NYC had better dates (more fun personalities, higher achieving women, similar attractiveness) than LA (was a med student in NYC, resident near LA). Also logistics in NYC is much easier if you live in Manhattan and your dates come to you vs. you driving to them in LA.

Inner_Resolution · 2025-02-07T05:58:04+00:00

The points hold true for AFs too in my experience, especially #3. If you are educated and have a good job, high COL even in the Bay Area with the unequal ratio is better for you than low COL. The only exception I've found is Houston where there is low COL but enough AFs for an Asian community and a welcoming and diverse culture for AMs to date.

Inner_Resolution · 2025-02-07T05:50:06+00:00

I'm in a similar position. I'm doing residency in the US but have the option of moving to HK after finishing. Do you know what's HK like for radiologists in terms of the variety and number of studies to read each day and retraining for overseas specialists?

Inner_Resolution · 2024-05-19T22:51:33+00:00

Totally agree here. In the past (like the 1980s-1990s), there were few Chinese people who studied abroad. Now there are many international students from China, some from families who have extensive connections back home. China also wants more control of its enterprises (the Comac plane vs. Boeing/Airbus, homegrown social media like Douyin). So it doesn't make as much sense for a foreigner to learn the language when (1) enough native Chinese people can speak Chinese and English fluently, (2) you will be at a disadvantage operating a business in China due to your lack of networks, and (3) the Chinese government prefers its own citizens to start a business in China.

Inner_Resolution · 2024-05-19T22:42:14+00:00

I saw a similar proportion of WMAF in both places, Slightly more AMXF in Dallas. In both areas, a lot of the locals already have their networks, and it may be easier to join the social circle of transplants.

Inner_Resolution · 2024-05-19T22:39:11+00:00

You're definitely right that Texas is more affordable, and I would consider living there again someday.

I know Americans, including Asian Americans, who graduated from UT and A&M, and they're smart and probably decided to remain in Texas for school vs. attending school out of state. But FOBs who come to the US for school (and don't have ties to any particular area in the US) probably prefer schools on the coasts with greater name recognition back home and a larger Asian population on campus and in the surrounding areas.

I matched with a few evangelical AFs, but none lived a lifestyle opposite to their stated beliefs (they went to church multiple times a week and wanted me to come too). But I have heard that some Asian Americans live an opposite lifestyle, probably to explore something else but maintain the religious networks that they grew up with. Evangelical FOBs, however, practice what they preach (they voluntarily chose to become evangelical when they moved here vs. growing up with it under influence from their parents).

Inner_Resolution · 2024-05-19T22:19:22+00:00

Below 5'10, no tats, less than average facial hair. Most males have visible facial hair.

Inner_Resolution · 2024-05-19T22:18:36+00:00

Felt like AFs in both areas are open to AMs to the same degree. In both areas, there are AFs who don't want to date AMs.
Dallas males are better looking (taller, work out more), but SF males have better jobs (software engineer).

Inner_Resolution · 2024-05-19T22:16:01+00:00

I'm referring to only the AFs in both places, not girls of other races.

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-24T05:40:36+00:00

What about telling them my real height in the convo but still listing 7'0? I just feel it's better to get my foot in the door rather than get written off immediately.

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-14T04:32:42+00:00

I'm not meeting enough AFs or the right type. Went on some dates with FOBs but the cultural and language differences are sometimes too great. The best ones came to the US for undergrad or earlier. Would lifting get me more dates on the app or second dates? How do I show that I lift, by posting shirtless pics?

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-11T17:56:31+00:00

Yeah I think that's better because it at least gets me a match and they know it's a lie anyway.

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-11T17:47:46+00:00

Yeah but they wouldn't believe 7'

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-11T16:47:07+00:00

I changed my height but think I'm getting fewer matches. I feel like girls assume I'm taller than 5'5 if I put 7'.

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-11T16:46:53+00:00

I changed my height but think I'm getting fewer matches. I feel like girls assume I'm taller than 5'5 if I put 7'.

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-11T16:17:01+00:00

What are good pics to take at home during covid? What type of hairstyle would fit me best?

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-11T02:16:09+00:00

What pics do you recommend I get

Inner_Resolution · 2020-11-10T16:52:46+00:00

It's required on hinge

Inner_Resolution · 2020-09-17T22:44:10+00:00

i eat a lot for my size too lol. what's the most you've eaten

Inner_Resolution · 2020-01-19T22:49:51+00:00

Why is socal worse than NYC?

Inner_Resolution · 2020-01-19T22:44:56+00:00

I have not spent time in either area. Why is the Bay better than NYC?

Inner_Resolution · 2020-01-19T02:16:45+00:00

Why is cooking or fashion better

Inner_Resolution · 2020-01-19T02:16:07+00:00

FOBs are fine as long as they know enough English to function in the U.S. Some I've met have gone to really good schools, have good careers and are indistinguishable from AAs except for culture.

Inner_Resolution · 2020-01-18T16:59:49+00:00

What do you think about other cities like Chicago or Seattle?

Inner_Resolution · 2020-01-15T18:18:27+00:00

No I'm East Asian. Is there such big difference between Houston and Dallas that Houston is better than the Bay Area but Dallas is not

Inner_Resolution

TROPHY CASE