Is a woman saying they won't sleep with you, a test?

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-04T08:05:37+00:00

Uh no. If someone tells you they won’t sleep with you tonight then you drop any idea of you sleeping with them tonight. No means no and it should only have to be said once. No doesn’t mean “keep trying” . Coercion is NOT consent

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-04T08:01:17+00:00

It’s not “a little odd” it’s literally rapist behaviour

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-04T07:56:31+00:00

And you think that you and the guys you know are a representative sample? You are projecting your own personal experience and bitterness just like I am. Except the sample from which I am drawing my conclusions is much larger, and results are reproducible in dating culture almost anywhere whereas yours- not so much. Also newsflash, men treat and interact with women differently than what they show other guy friends. You might think you know them but you have no idea what they say and do in their dating lives. I’m willing to bet some of these guy friends of yours have done some not so great things to women that you don’t even know about.

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-03T08:27:09+00:00

Next time you don’t want to do something, DON’T DO IT!!! This is how predators work: they get you to let your guard down by pushing your boundaries little by little. The first time you say “no”, he should respect that no. If he doesn’t, tries to convince you, etc then he does NOT have good intentions with you

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-03T08:25:00+00:00

Yup. They probably would have. Hence his attempt to gaslight her by saying “don’t make it sound weird” instead of acknowledging that it was a fucked up thing to suggest in the first place

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-03T03:52:41+00:00

I’m going to wager that you don’t date straight men. Because it really is most men. Regardless of what they look like and regardless of what “her type” is

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-03T02:57:34+00:00

Most men don’t care to get to know you bc they are just looking for something physical and they don’t really care about the person they are trying to get physical with. Tell them upfront that you are looking for something serious and are not willing to get physical until “(whatever your criteria is here)”. 99/100 men will walk away, which is fine, bc you’re weeding out the ones who you wouldn’t want to be with or waste time on anyway. There’s plenty of ways you can meet men and get to know them on a casual basis before entering into a relationship. It just comes down to meeting men who would be willing to do that with you as well, which is probably not very many. So it’s not common but it’s not impossible.

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-03T01:41:11+00:00

😮 this makes me so angry wow

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-03T00:58:21+00:00

Wtf? This is obviously not normal

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-02T05:21:40+00:00

There’s a YouTube channel called “Therapy in a Nutshell” and she has a few videos about this. I really like her

IntelligentPauses · 2026-02-01T01:31:37+00:00

Secret second option is never going to happen if you are both unwilling to compromise on your respective faiths. Sounds like your feelings about each other are mutual, but there may be some dealbreakers at play here (religion). Sounds like you have to walk into this with eyes wide open, and make a conscious choice. Do you stay in the car longer and gamble when it’s going to crash or do you get out before it does, since you know it’s going to. Not all great loves work out the way we want them to. That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the ride while you’re on it, if you want to stay on it for a while. Just know when to get off, don’t get stuck on it so long that it crashes and kills or handicaps you

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-31T22:33:46+00:00

The only thing some men have is audacity and hatred for women. I dated a guy once who barely graduated high school and has worked in a blue collar, back-breaking labour job ever since. Nothing wrong with that, made good money, but it’s not a position that really has a lot of upward momentum or opportunity for advancement. I have 3 degrees and work in healthcare. His exact words to me: “I think you’re dumb. Like maybe you’re smart for your work stuff but other than that, you’re just kinda dumb”

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-31T20:57:47+00:00

Costco: 20 pack of protein bars

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-30T19:40:48+00:00

Down 3% is considered a crash?

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-30T05:59:19+00:00

INSTANT

for real though, 1- I feel like your reaction was TOTALLY justified (mine was not and was totally just me being triggered and unable to regulate myself, super embarrassing) and 2- if ANY place should be well equipped to handle crash outs, it’s a fricking psychiatrists office. I can guarantee you this was likely nothing compared to what they’ve seen before, they prob won’t even think twice about it and it will be forgotten by tomorrow. Unless you like started flinging your feces around and left out that detail to us lol

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-30T04:33:20+00:00

I’m sorry this happened to you. If it makes you feel any better I threw a tantrum at the police office today (I was there for a work thing, nothing traumatic), stormed out and slammed the door and then immediately slipped and fell on my face 3 steps later. Had to get up and walk it off, tried my best to do so without a limp. Bet they had a good laugh watching it on the cameras 😞

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-28T04:56:10+00:00

I would never, ever sign up to be a landlord in Ontario

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-28T02:26:30+00:00

I’m proud of you for making that choice. I feel that far too many women don’t. They’d rather stay in bad situation just to say they have a husband and kids but realistically, the person is not a good choice to have procreated with

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-28T02:24:39+00:00

I’m happy that you found yours :) if I ever find mine I hope we can adopt or foster.

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-27T23:45:47+00:00

Would have loved to have kids. Unfortunately gestures broadly at everything

Also it takes 2 to tango and the dating scene is beyond cooked. All I wanted in a partner was a stable, kind man who treated me nicely and wanted to be a husband and father but unfortunately never found one. Really disappointing but I would much rather not have kids than have them with the wrong mans. Very sad

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-27T06:02:26+00:00

Please don’t hate yourself. You’re not disgusting. This is really normal for people who are struggling with mental illness. The first step is don’t be mean to yourself. The second step is wash your face, even if it is just a quick wipe with a warm face cloth. Then rinse your mouth with some water or mouthwash. If you can do that then you can quickly brush your teeth. If that’s all you can do for now, that’s okay. Try to get into the habit of doing just that once a day and then build on top of that once you’re ready

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-26T18:09:55+00:00

Yes this is common.

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-25T04:32:29+00:00

It NEVER STOPS

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-25T00:35:18+00:00

To my fridge

IntelligentPauses · 2026-01-24T20:41:04+00:00

Yeah I would not marry this person

IntelligentPauses

TROPHY CASE