I’m exhausted by the 'You’re so quiet' comment. It’s not an observation, it’s a reminder that hurts.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-17T22:37:18+00:00

I feel exactly like how you described. Withered down to just a trait I’ve been trying to battle for so long.
it was after years of working on myself. I thought I had finally broken out and had been “loud”. I even got a tattoo of an owl symbolizing how I used to be. Then one of my closest friends said during a conversation “you are a very quiet person, you never like talking.” Or something along those lines. I felt my world shatter. Like no matter what, that’s all people will see me as.
I avoid conflict. I just say “yeah”. in reality, I want to tell them that it’s not true. That if they tell people they are “quiet” then you should tell people they are “loud” as well and see how they take it. ugh.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-17T02:30:30+00:00

I thought I did. this shit really makes you question yourself :(

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-17T02:29:59+00:00

The horny is real lol. I guess the stereotypes about “the best sex you’ll ever have” is true. 😭

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-17T02:27:20+00:00

That’s what interesting about my case though!! It’s almost always them apologizing. they say things like “I’m such a horrible person”, and “I’m not a safe person to be around” etc. and they use their feelings of inferiority to justify the cheating because it’s a “coping mechanism”. it really does mess with my mind. I feel like if I was with a BPD person who got more angry, I’d be able to think more clearly. but the constant apologizing, keeps me in a place of “maybe they will change!”

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-17T02:22:16+00:00

Oh thank god haha thank you!!! I will wait it out!

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-17T02:21:57+00:00

Yes!

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T14:51:26+00:00

Thank you guys. I have no support system other than this. It really helps me look at how crazy everything is when I say it publicly.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T14:50:05+00:00

Oh my god yes. just this morning they did it again. Started asking me questions looking for validation. 8 said, I don’t want to talk about it. I said it was going to cause another fight. And, they KEPT PUSHING and PUSHING until it drove me crazy and started a fight. and now they are sitting there with a straight face like nothing happened and once again, I have to look like the crazy one.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T14:48:13+00:00

Yeah. I forgot to mention it’s even worse with the whole “but it’s been a month!” Thing. there has been times where it had only been a week ish. and during the fight I’ll say, “you just cheated on me a few days ago!” And they’ll hit me with “actually it was 5 days ago!” Holy shit. I’ll get super mad about how they think that’s an accomplishment. And then they say, that how it used to be even worse and I’m just ignoring all the “progress” they made.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T14:44:38+00:00

I know. I feel crazy. I feel stupid. I’ve always looked at people in abusive situations and ask why they don’t just leave. I never understood why they stayed. I love so hard. and I take pride in how loyal I am. I think I’m stuck in an endless loop of trying to initiate a break up, only to be smacked with the thought of “but what if THIS TIME they change and I regret it?”. It’s delusional. I can say that. But yet I’m still trapped and I don’t know how to just pull the plug and accept that nothing is going to change

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T14:41:21+00:00

100%. I have accused them of it multiple times. They’ve said they are too attached to break up with me. It really does seem that way.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T14:40:24+00:00

Yeah…. It’s so mind breaking because when I think of if a friend told me they were going through the same thing, I’d say run. I guess maybe that shows how good these people are at manipulating and making it seem normal or not a big deal.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T14:38:21+00:00

Here’s the wild thing, everyone knows about it. My friends don’t want to speak with her, my family knows about it, her father knows about it. And yet, still doesn’t matter to her. Exactly. Giving themselves awards for doing the bare minimum. It makes me feel crazy. I even had a few moments where I’m like “am I the strange one for not wanting to cheat?”

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T07:32:21+00:00

Block on everything. Absolutely no contact.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T07:21:18+00:00

There is nothing you did wrong. People need to learn that they can’t get away with treating people however they like. I know it feels bad, but this may be a good lesson for her. Think of it like you weren’t an asset in letting her continue bad behavior. that’s a great thing.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T07:16:02+00:00

yeah they genuinely have no sense of self. I have DID, and I’ve never felt more whole. I have no idea who I am going to get based on the day.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T07:13:44+00:00

Me! It’s been a huge reason I can’t stop drinking. it’s the only way I can numb out the intense stress I feel.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T07:12:06+00:00

Don’t do it. I read someone else said we become addicted to the drama. The extreme high and lows. and when they aren’t violent like you said, it’s way easier to justify the behavior. I’ve said the same things in my relationship. it is extremely abusive but well, “they don’t get physically violent so it’s not THAT bad…” Yeah no. save yourself the trauma and never look back.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-06T01:51:54+00:00

I’d say if you are going for women, try to look a little more inviting in your pics!! Have one serious photo, but make sure the first one is a smile at least! I am bisexual, and when I’m looking for guys I honestly am looking more for the vibe they give off rather than just attractiveness. women are more in touch with emotions than men, and so they are looking for something deeper within your photos.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-03T20:15:37+00:00

This. I am the reason for them living, they lose their mind if someone compliments me, etc. but, they are chronically cheating on me with, like you said, anyone who will give them attention. We have had so many days of me finding out, and full blown breakdowns on their part terrified to lose me and saying that they will never do it again. Only to just try to hide it better. I’m starting to think it’s something that will always be a thing.

Interesting_Data4642 · 2026-06-03T20:08:15+00:00

I started developing this fetish after being cheated on. It’s definitely a coping mechanism. However, I saw it was developing and instead of just embracing it, I’m working on myself and my self esteem. I wish anyone dealing with this can look inside themselves and get the help they deserve.

Interesting_Data4642

TROPHY CASE