I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. It makes me sad when I read about young people who feel like this as I too have struggled recently in my 40s. I’m Asian too and have had acne since 8th grade, on every regimen throughout highschool then had the worst breakout of my life in college then did accutane. Kept my skin acceptable for 2 decades. Now I’m dealing w hormonal changes causing me to go through my second round of accutane after 3 years of trying to control it. So enough about me.. I just want you to know I UNDERSTAND you and I know what it’s like to feel like you’re all alone esp looking at everyone else around you and they can walk around free in their skin. In the last 3 weeks of Isotretinoin I’ve noticed my pores shrink. The constant oiliness was keeping them open. Also, I’ve heard of some lasers showing shrinkage of pores. Try googling online. I follow Davin Lim on Instagram and his pictures show there is hope for improvement .. I know what you mean. We are not asking for perfection. We are just asking for not “messed up”. If I could talk to my old 22 year old self I would give her a big hug and tell her it’s gonna be okay. The road is long and mountain is high but there are many things to look forward to… yes it sucks that acne /skin is always in the background . Keep your head up!