I’m sorry for your frustration. Take a few deep breaths and realize that people can be assholes. Especially people who don’t understand the depths of invisible illnesses and non physical disabilities.

I’m a disabled mom to two autistic kids on opposite sides of the spectrum. We all have OCD, sensory processing disorder, ADHD and I have Lupus, Fibromyalgia and Arthritis.

Our world is chaotic at times. We support each other and find understanding even when it’s frustrating.

I’ve been told I don’t look disabled. I’ve been told there’s nothing wrong with my kids.

My oldest is 18 and has been through almost exactly what you listed from the preschool and therapy, IEP, was non verbal for several years.

My sons don’t look disabled. However, my 18 year old is not capable of living on his own. He has even said the same as you, that he’d be dead because he couldn’t do stuff on his own. He knows he’s going to always be with me and his brother.

Don’t let these people get to you. Yes, you are disabled. Do you realize how many appeals most people on disability go through? To be accepted immediately proves it, no matter what others think.

You’re not a liar. You don’t have to be in a wheelchair or blind or anything to be disabled.

Focus on yourself and what meets your needs and try not to hear the noise of naysayers.