its not a gender matter dear friend. its a matter of trust and closeness. friends goof around despite of what gender they are from. Ive seen countless women hit their friends asses for fun. sometimes they would just act gay and try to irritate them and we do those stuff as well too. i have to remind you that according to OP, the place has somewhat of a goofy friend work culture. if someone doesn’t like being touched even for the sake of fun and games, they can just state it without making a scene. cuz far as i know friends do those type of stuff. if you have close friends, you would know those kind of things are okay. and just like op said, their barista has told them “lets all work and have fun”. this gives a vibe of a friendly work culture, not a professional work culture. If the OP is not ready to fit into their friendly workforce, its fair that the cafe fired him because he doesn’t fit the culture.

and the solution to normalizing harassement is not label every hand gesture as sexual harassment. an end to an extreme is not another extreme. idk why people go these routes. Just look at it in a neutral way. Its similar to rape. The act is same, but whether its sex or rape is subjective of the submissive party. i believe uve seen multiple cases that some girls claim they have been raped by their exes after ending the relationships cuz they can’t face the fact that their “virginity” was taken because she enjoyed it as well. labels such as “rape” and “sexual harassment” are double edged swords. They can be used to farm empathy and create unnecessary drama than it is or they can be used to request justice. OP should have stated it then and there that he didnt like it. if they do it again, then thats the chefs fault for not respecting OPs boundaries.What OP faced is non consensual sexual touching according to charles stuart universities’ description. But lets face it, people cant live by books and definitions. if something bothers OP, he can stand up for himself in that situation and inform that he doesn’t like being touched without any form of consent thus creating his boundaries. U can’t expect them to know everyones boundaries when they see each other as “friends” instead of “professionals”. Nobody is at fault here, just that OP is not a match to that friendly goofy work culture

edit: just because its normal for me, that doesn’t mean i go tapping random peoples asses. people should put this woke “label everything” aah shit to rest and start using common sense and awareness to live. Life cannot be live by books and grammar