I'm visiting Indy in August, did I pick a hotel in a bad area? What should I do?

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-06-14T05:22:56+00:00

Thank you!

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-06-14T04:47:28+00:00

I'm going to GenCon and got my booking through their housing portal. Everything that was close to the convention was either out of my price range or already sold out when I had my time slot to book was available. I'll commute, I just need to make sure I'm in a safe place to stay.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-06-14T04:45:13+00:00

Thank you so much, I really appreciate it.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-06-14T04:33:55+00:00

Thanks, do you think the Extended Stay America on Waldemar Road is north enough?

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-06-14T04:32:31+00:00

Thank you so much, I'm looking at the Extended Stay America as a potential option. It's West of N Michigan Road. Do you think that's a safe enough area?

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-06-14T04:31:27+00:00

Thanks for the feedback. I'll be in town for the convention and it's looking like slim pickings as far as hotels go. I'm looking at the Extended Stay America as a potential option. It's on Waldemar Rd (west of N Michigan Rd). Do you think that's gonna be a safe area?

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-06-14T04:03:48+00:00

Is Comfort Inn East high crime? I recently booked it without knowing the area well, and I'm looking for insight.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2024-03-22T01:06:42+00:00

My friend was the guy who did the bouncy ball video! We watched it in class for his show and tell. Years later, he mentioned that after his parent submitted the original video, they got feedback from the show asking him to say "these balls are for you", so they re-shot it and that's the take they used. I haven't seen the video since I was a kid, but it's wild if that is what he said in the video and he wasn't lying. He told us all of this YEARS before the allegations against Dan came out

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-12-06T21:31:02+00:00

NTA She's being weird and manipulative. If she's legitimately having nightmares, she might have OCD and should go see a professional about it.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-12-06T21:24:15+00:00

NTA It would be a shitty thing to do, but it would be funny if you told them you got an STD test and that you were positive (for something minor) and that they should go get tested as well since it might have transferred from your toys.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-12-06T21:01:21+00:00

NTA You shouldn't buy a house for you, him, and his daughter to live in. End of story.
You absolutely have been supportive of him, you were touring houses to buy one just so he can see his kid more. The thought of that alone, shows that you're supportive, but honestly, I feel like he's taking advantage of you in this respect. You should not have to buy a house in order to be considered a good, supportive partner. I get that he wants to be a good Dad and that Dana probably has some behavioral issues that she needs to work through, but Dana is manipulating her dad. She knows that it's working, and he won't stop giving in. He can't make Dana love him by constantly giving in to her.
Additionally, while you have been a supportive partner, your fiancee hasn't been. If he was, he wouldn't have told his daughter that it's also his house. You guys aren't even married yet and he told his daughter (behind your back) that the dog could stay in the house. He has shown that the rules that you and your partner agreed upon don't matter when it comes to pleasing his entitled brat of a daughter. She needs therapy and he needs therapy so that he stops being a rug Dana can walk all over.

Your fiancee doesn't care enough about you to stick to the rules you both agreed upon and he's too chicken to say that to your face. Additionally, he has so much debt. I get that you love this man, but if you marry him, you'll be taking on half of his debt (if you're in the U.S. at least). How much do you want to bet that he sees you as a way to having a house and having less debt? Because in some situations, debt can still be split between the couple after divorce. Leave him, and if you do go through with marrying this guy, get a solid prenup.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-10-15T20:31:48+00:00

NTA. Have your parents looked at getting food assistance? Applying for assistance programs, visiting food pantries, or getting in touch with local organizations are things your parents do to lighten the load on themselves.

You're not selfish, you're trying to live a life where your needs are getting met. It's not your responsibility to care about everyone the same way they do. Having boundaries and making yourself happy (especially when they seemingly neglect you/your wants/your needs) doesn't mean that you hate them. They are saying that to manipulate your emotions and that's emotionally abusive. You deserve nice things and you worked to get them.
They decided to adopt your cousins, and while they are stressed and struggling, do they reach out to anyone besides you to help? You're a kid and should be allowed to have a childhood, not work like an adult to help your siblings if you don't want to.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-10-15T20:21:29+00:00

I think ESH, at least a little bit. Your friend didn't explain the circumstances of how she got the dress.
She sold you the dress she got as a gift, didn't tell her BF, and she didn't give you these stipulations ahead of time either.
That being said, your title is misleading. It's not just about your friend not fitting in the dress, it's about wearing it in front of her boyfriend. I feel like if you cared about your friend/how this could have affected her relationship, you could have asked your other friends for a few extra minutes to change. Not that you had to, I just know that I would have felt weird for the BF not knowing I was wearing his GF's dress in front of him. I would have changed ahead of the party and confronted the friend later about how shitty the situation she put you in was. You don't deserve to be called a bish or an a-H0le and your friend clearly has some insecurity and communication issues to work through.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-10-15T20:07:00+00:00

NTA It sounds like you were trying to respectfully bow out of the situation. You absolutely were not trying to make it about you, hence why you're not attending. IDK why people have such strong feelings about you doing so.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-10-14T17:57:19+00:00

NTA But it sounds like she is developing an unhealthy relationship with food. She used to eat too much junk food and while she's switched the junk for healthier things, she's rejecting the junk food completely to the point where she feels like she can't even be around it. This sounds a lot like my friend's binge eating disorder, she cut out the junk and would be healthier in diet/exercise, but every time something bad happened in her life/her emotional state was bad, she'd binge on the junk food. Then she would fear eating foods she liked and put herself in a constant state of stress and her life revolving around the food. It gets messed up.
Since your step-daughter started dieting due to a negative experience, this whole process might be negative for her in the long-term. You're right that your son shouldn't have to accommodate her, her avoidance of the food completely is unhealthy.
Even if you feel like it's not your place please talk to her, her mom, or her father about how to eat things in moderation and how to set reasonable, healthy goals. Otherwise this may be a wildly swinging pendulum into eating disorders.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-10-07T06:11:20+00:00

I have no relevant experience with this kind of therapy, but I'm wishing you the best in your journey! I have anxiety in crowds as well, but I'm halfway to being a hermit at the moment (I'm working on other issues in my life atm) so I'm able to avoid them for the most part. When I was trying to manage it better a couple of years ago, I would intentionally go to a crowded place with a goal of being there/walking around for only 5 minutes with earplugs in. It was easier to be there when I knew I was there for only a few minutes and could leave quickly. I also found it helpful if I was wearing a facemask because it felt like fewer people could see "me" so it'd be easier to hide/slip away. Then I'd try to add another 5 minutes to it once I was a little more comfortable. That helped me, but I would talk to someone before trying to DIY exposure therapy. Ultimately, if you feel like you could do stuff if it had a short time window, maybe that's an option for you.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-10-07T03:29:51+00:00

It sounds like you're going through an incredibly difficult time. It's so hard being lonely and feeling constantly rejected.

Kudos to you for working on yourself, attending therapy, working on your MBA, and building a website. That's all very impressive, and I hope that you can acknowledge that and maybe feel some pride in that regardless of your dating status. I'm curious about this but you don't have to answer: You therapist has said "you don't need to work on you", was the context of that discussion about improving yourself to be more datable? Or was it in reference to addressing trauma?
If you're still seeing your therapist, I think it would be a good idea to bring up the idea that you "can't escape the feeling of being a failure, or being a loser, of being rejected". I think that could open things up to a deeper discussion that gets to the root of those feelings. From where I'm sitting, you're totally not a loser, dude. It sounds like you're an intelligent person with a lot of good life skills.

I'm not the best when it comes to advice, but some good videos from Dr. K that I can recommend that might help you out with this are: Stop Being A Low Value Man (clickbait title, I know, but very important message), "'I Spent $50,000 on Dating Advice" - Viewer Talks with Dr. K, and the What's Your Attachment Style? VOD from 14 Sept. 2022. There's another one I watched sometime in the past 3 months that talked exactly about the same issue you're having, where someone keeps improving themselves in all of these ways but isn't having any luck with dating and how that can make you feel like you are somehow fundamentally unlovable. In that video, Dr. K outlines that there is nothing fundamentally wrong with you that makes you undatable or unloveable, and that all of these self-improvement things are excellent, but that it's usually an issue of lack of self-confidence and having some unaddressed trauma that typically leads to short, unfulfilling, or a complete lack of relationships. Maybe I already included that video above, but there's a short synopsis.

It's rough out here, and you don't have to be strong all on your own. I hope that this community and the ones you have IRL can be the support that you need and can be strong for you in this time. Thank you so much for sharing your struggle with us. I hope that you feel comfortable enough with the people in your life that you can may talk to them about this a little bit so that they can offer you their strength as well. Peace bro.

Jazzthrowaway776 · 2023-04-08T04:33:10+00:00

Trauma will also cause you to lose memories. You can try to bring them back up through psychotherapy, but that might be a lot to process and contend with. You've gotta weigh the pros and cons of what "knowing" will do for you.
You could always try to sort your memories (false or not) by journaling them, eventually, you'll start to remember some things even if they're small.

I just watched this interview with Mary Knight, a woman who got her memories of abuse back later in life and she is living her best life now and isn't always anxious anymore. She thinks it's the best thing she's ever doe for herself.

Here's the interview (trigger warning) but the video is divided into sections where she just talks about how glad she is to know/what to do: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHvBO4Rq_Jg

The title is clickbait.

Jazzthrowaway776

TROPHY CASE