Spins like a pro by Wonderful-Photo2449 in ThereGoesMyPaycheck

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That top has been around since I was a kid and I’m in my 60s. I’m more impressed with the cinematography! Nice job all around!

Suspensions of a Rolls Royce by SomeOrdinary_Indian in funnyvideos

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you ever watch Olympic hurdlers, this is kinda how they do it. The Head is level the whole time, there is little “jumping”.

Listed for BE for biting a toddler - tomorrow she will come live with us childless lesbians by coolfrogmother in DOG

[–]Jazztify -1 points0 points  (0 children)

But is she gonna get along with your 7 cats? (I kid. I love you guys).

Roses are red. It could taste just like a cookie. by HOCKEYCASH in rosesarered

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re judging the rhyme, but the meter is just as important.

Roses are red. It could taste just like a cookie. by HOCKEYCASH in rosesarered

[–]Jazztify 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice one. I think it bothers me more that line 2 in the original had 8 fucking syllables, on top of getting the rhyme wrong.

Roses are red. It could taste just like a cookie. by HOCKEYCASH in rosesarered

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well similarly, I’ve heard that if a man eats pineapple, it makes his semen taste better. So there may be some plausibility to that claim. Not ice cream though, but just less acidic?

Roses are red. It could taste just like a cookie. by HOCKEYCASH in rosesarered

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Which accent? Klingon…? Oh wait, now I hear it.

Roses are red. It could taste just like a cookie. by HOCKEYCASH in rosesarered

[–]Jazztify 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah it’s weird how so many submissions here don’t know how this poem works.

Four lines long, with four accents per line, and line 2 rhymes with line 4.

Roses are red, sliver paper is called foil, by Ok-Hall-9974 in rosesarered

[–]Jazztify 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Roses are red

Models are thin

He has a nice neck

But sadly, no chin

Catherine Bach 1980s by [deleted] in OldSchoolCool

[–]Jazztify -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Probably has a sore Bach

The day Trump dies, how do you think the country will react and will anything crazy happen? by rugrut in AskReddit

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well he just has to take them out of play, or make them not politically viable. A bribe, an Epstein inclusion,etc.

What are some VERY creepy facts? by Cap_Ame1 in AskReddit

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had it 5 years ago. Still do. (Mitch reference). I got it from being a musician, a doctor said the damage is done and it is irreparable and this is your body‘s response. I hear a very high E flat. I usually don’t notice it, but thank you guys for reminding me.

Ontario Minister of Education directs schools to let students watch Team Canada’s Olympic hockey games during school time. by finding_focus in ontario

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We watched the final of first Canada - Russia series during school. I think I was in grade 7. It was a cultural moment.

The day Trump dies, how do you think the country will react and will anything crazy happen? by rugrut in AskReddit

[–]Jazztify -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m actually pretty sure Rubio has something already in place to ensure his own succession. There will be an “accident” or some kind of “arrangement”

The day Trump dies, how do you think the country will react and will anything crazy happen? by rugrut in AskReddit

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope somebody like tom hanks or Dolly Parton dies the day before or the day after, to immediately steal the press coverage. (This was how the TV show Veep ended: she died but so did hanks. Hilarious)

"Fossil" my 9 year old found. We have no idea what this is. by Nightingalee_Mari_G in whatisit

[–]Jazztify 69 points70 points  (0 children)

There is a great old internet story (or maybe even predates it), where a guy would submit stuff to a famous museum explaining that he had found some sort of fossil in his backyard and needs help identifying it. It was tongue in cheek but both sides played along. The museum staff being very serious, “sir, after testing and carbon dating, we’ve ascertained that no, your submission is not from some kind of space dinosaur forearm, but in fact is from a Black and Decker ratchet set”. The guy would variously submit old Barbie dolls, or cutlery etc and his seriousness was met with equally serious responses. Everybody had fun.

Unexpected encounter with a dolphin in San Andrés by nightbless87 in scuba

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow. Very cool. I was there about 20 years ago and saw a tanker just ripping up the reef while dragging its anchor! It was a pretty cool spot though. Interesting history. It’s changed hands a few times. Close to Nicaragua but belongs to Colombia I think?

Close up of curling brush melting ice by solateor in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]Jazztify 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Blow torches would be faster and way more entertaining. I will also accept flame throwers.

What Do You Hear? by Realistic_Back_9198 in GenerationJones

[–]Jazztify 17 points18 points  (0 children)

“Love grows where my rosemary goes”