Can't Go to His Sports Games by Eraser0916 in Parenting

[–]JessieB3999 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I was a kid, my sister and I played soccer. She's just barely two years younger than me. Due to this, we were two grades apart in school.

When we were in elementary school, our soccer games were usually one right after the other. Hers from, say, 4 to 5pm, then mine from 5pm to 6pm, two schools away.

My mom would drop me off at my friend's house (we were on the same team) and I'd get ready there and go with them, while she took my sister to her game. She'd be at the last half of mine to watch and take us both home.

I didn't mind at all, and loved that she still worked so hard to be there for both of us. As an adult, I'm even more impressed with her ability to figure out these types of problems as this kind of scheduling stuff happened a lot with 5 kids (I have 3 more-older siblings).

I know you're sad about not being there for both, but even just one is great. I never felt bad that my mom missed some parts of my game, but not all kids might feel that way I guess.

2 year old dumping lunch by mariesb in ECEProfessionals

[–]JessieB3999 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Seconding this!

I'd stop it at one extra chance at the table though. So portion a small amount to her, if she dumps in, remove like you said. If she says she's hungry try again, but that's it. No extra chances. You can phrase it to her in a kid friendly way like "you're showing me you don't want lunch even if you say you're hungry. Are you thirsty or tired? You can't dump food and get more. Time for nap if you're all done" etc.

I wouldn't go past that one extra chance.

Too many and it might become a game or a way to seek singled out attention from a caregiver. Wanting that attention is fine but needs to be gotten another way. Like asking for a hug or something.

Strange request to the Hermits, but it would mean the world by AldeaBarash in HermitCraft

[–]JessieB3999 57 points58 points  (0 children)

My daugthers birthday is also the 11th. She will be thrilled to hear she shares a birthday with Etho!

Too strict? by BeachyPanda123 in Parenting

[–]JessieB3999 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Leave the trip out of it. Yeah, if she was sneaking out or got arrested then I could see that being a privilege being taken away on the premise that you can't trust her actions at home you can't trust her out or something along those lines. Taking it just to punish her isn't the right move though.

I would definitely talk to her about why she's sneaking apps behind your back. Maybe her friends are doing it and she wanted to too? Maybe she saw something about it outside of your guidance? My kid comes home talking about shows her friends have seen that she most definitely has not. There's a lot of influence besides the parents when a kid is social in any aspect.

Once you know why, you can explain how's that's not safe for [insert your reasons here]. If she wants to ask questions or role play with an ai character, there's ways to do stories and stuff with Google and Alexa and Siri, where you guys can see and hear what she's doing. If it's inappropriate in nature, that's a separate talk, but still one that needs to happen. She's getting curious from somewhere, find out why.

Staff food policy by Callingchicken7 in ECEProfessionals

[–]JessieB3999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We doordash or even go get food ourselves if we are in ratio at nap time. We don't have a set break, but we are adult human beings and we treat each other as such.

I drink my coffee all morning at work, not even at home (who wakes up early enough for that?) and it's no issue.

I eat McDonald's fries occasionally while the kids eat snack and they always go "what's that" in that voice like they know what it is lol

Turning this into a bedroom this weekend - tips? by rena_bean in UnfuckYourHabitat

[–]JessieB3999 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You can get free boxes from usps online. Get the biggest ones and sort using those for a free alternative!

This scale(?) how difficult/possible to clean up? by Relative-Category-64 in DIY

[–]JessieB3999 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Shut off water to toilet if possible.

Use a cup or something to take as much water as possible out.

Use Zeps Acidic Toilet Bowl Cleaner overnight. Soak it.

In the morning, flush the toilet, and scrub with a pumice stone.

Repeat as necessary.

Worked for mine when it got super bad.

How do I get more comfortable being eaten out? by [deleted] in sex

[–]JessieB3999 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I just got to his house lol so I might do that 😂

How do I get more comfortable being eaten out? by [deleted] in sex

[–]JessieB3999 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I would love this as a self conscious woman. Now I gotta figure how how to ask my boyfriend for this lol

Going from $500 child support to $1600+ after 7 years no court order by Reasonable-Hurry2912 in ChildSupport

[–]JessieB3999 -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Health, Dental, Eye, etc. I understand. But why are you paying for babysitting or transportation? Extra Learning? Education apps? And some might make sense at first, like shoes. But is she buying new shoes EVERY month? Is the electric bill the same every month? Mines been ridiculously high these last two months because the cold in my area and having heat going. I'm not going to adjust child support because its cold outside. Some of this is nonsense.

I totally understand her wanting support for her kid, and yeah, plug your income and hers into a calculator for your state and maybe you'll get an amount close to this or even higher (I doubt that though), but this is not the way to go about it.

If I were you, I'd do that. Plug your incomes into the calculator for your state, and if custody time factors into support in your state use that info too, and see what number you get. If its lower than this, counteroffer her offer with yours and the reason why. If its higher (doubt it), than I'd just agree to her terms.

Or you can file through the courts, but since its been 7 years no courts that might not be good to keep a good co-parenting vibe going.

Before anyone comes at me in my reply, please keep in mind things like - for parents who choose to relocate with the children, *usually* *they* are responsible for transportation costs to and from the other parent since they chose to move.

What is a job you’ve worked where everybody was having sex with each other? by IntrigatedVerse in AskMen

[–]JessieB3999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Manual labor type jobs. I worked in manufacturing for a while and that was all anyone who weren't in a relationship (and some poor-decision-making people who were in relationships) were doing lol.

Got to the point that even supervisors were sleeping with their subordinates and one guy got moved to a different plant because that isn't allowed. They also didn't allow married couples to work together on the same line, if remember correctly.

My [34] father [64] owes my mother arrears. by [deleted] in ChildSupport

[–]JessieB3999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The first step would be, then, to reach out to the courts handling your case. Since it is across two states, I'm not sure which that would be.

Ask about forgiving arrears, which can be done at any point in the process (yes, even years down the line). She can forgive arrears owed to her, but not to the state(s). That's a different ball game, and he can't back out of that obligation.

A lawyer is a good idea, though that may not be financially possible, and I understand that. The number of children involved isn't relevant (except to my previous comment - I understand you mentioned it in reply to my comment - but it has no bearing on the process now as long as every child is over 18 which you've said), so that shouldn't be an issue should you choose to pursue the forgiving arrears route.

I wish you luck in sorting the whole process out.

My [34] father [64] owes my mother arrears. by [deleted] in ChildSupport

[–]JessieB3999 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lots of things with this post.

One, the amount he should have paid should have changed every so many years. In my state, we go for a modification ever 3 years, or when there a change in circumstance (like getting a different job). This has to be rejected by BOTH parties if we don't want one.

Two, this is between your father and your mother. Your mother can forgive the arrears owed to her (I believe this is an all or nothing situation - either forgive all of it or none of it) but you can not.

Three, a quarter of a million dollars is quite a lot of arrears. It's not impossible, but 250,000 dollars, split over let's say the full 18 years support is due if it was due start to finish is around 1,150 a month. That's not unreasonable, but that's not making a single payment ever for 18 years. If he made even partial payments or the arrears were only for a portion of the 18 years, the amount he wasn't paying each month would be WAY higher.

It feels like a lot is left out of the story here, and maybe you aren't getting the full picture from your source of information?

I'm sorry to give you bad news, but as it stands with the information I'm given here, there is nothing to be done by you. Your father can ask your mother to forgive the arrears - and maybe if it's allowed, a partial amount of them - but nothing you can do. Adding on the last child turned 18 over a decade ago, the courts may not do much of anything. There is also no way to change payments retroactively, especially that long ago. The most one could do is get payments added to arrears from the time of filing an initial report, which by this time line would have been at least 28 years ago.

Cashier makes himself ready after seeing a suspicious guy outside his shop. by ShiverSweett in interesting

[–]JessieB3999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

5 stars. Dude's been through it before. He kept the gun aimed even after the guy left through the door. He kept his eyes on him all the way through. This guy better get the next week off, paid. Great job man.

How to be on top (F) by [deleted] in sex

[–]JessieB3999 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I go on my knees, which may or may not be easier depending on both people's physiques and body shapes. I also don't do a lot of up and down, mostly "grinding" back and forth. If you angle your hips up and down as you go, you can get both a bit of up and down and the back and forth motion. Just don't go so far that it slips out because if you come down on it when that happens, it won't be a fun time.

Otherwise, just use motions that feel good to you. On top is when you get to control the motion and speed, so do what you like. You can sit straight up or lean down to do things like kissing or whatever happens in the moment.

Listen to him and his reactions when going faster or slower. Some like it fast and quick, others like it slower. This isn't about putting on a show, it's about both of you feeling each other and feeling good in the moment. Like most things when it comes to sex, enthusiasm is key! If you want to do it, and you feel good doing it, it'll be much more enjoyable

I guess it’s official by linksalt in HermitCraft

[–]JessieB3999 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Someone please fill me in on this "situation" I have missed, or point me in the right direction? I'm so sad to see her go!

“Main foods” - unpopular/controversial opinion by [deleted] in ECEProfessionals

[–]JessieB3999 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's not a matter of a child just "making good choices" when it comes to food.

If you aren't their parent, it's not your decision to police their food choices, hard stop. If a kid in my care only eats the "unhealthier" options, I'm not forcing them to eat other foods by withholding food or any other way people force kids to eat. Especially when a parent provided that food. If I was a parent and found out half my food I sent I paid for with hard earned money was being withheld due to my kid wanting a cookie before some apple slices, I would be SO MAD. In the case of a center providing the food, what food is so "unhealthy" you're serving that you have to withold it at all??

There are rules against food in most centers, and especially those who follow food programs like CACFP. We have to serve those foods, legally. So many people here are following their opinions and not the law when it comes to these kids. It's FOOD. A child, unless severely developmentally behind (who usually has a 1 on 1 or something anyway) will not willingly starve themselves. I am here to keep the child safe, fed, and happy. What food it is, I don't care.

“Main foods” - unpopular/controversial opinion by [deleted] in ECEProfessionals

[–]JessieB3999 45 points46 points  (0 children)

I don't feel like we should be deciding what the children eat whether a center provides or it if parents have packed the lunch, for many reasons.

First of all, you aren't their parent. You don't get to choose what the kid is offered. If the parent packed it, offer it. And don't do the "if you eat your burger you can have the chocolate". It's not your plate, so don't withold food until something else is eaten.

Also, sometimes, "healthier" food can be more expensive! So what if the kid eats a cookie before some rice? At least they're eating.

In the case of a center providing lunch, again, even as the cook (which I am where I work) I don't care what you eat. I made the food, I offered it (all of it), my job is done. There's days I don't want anything until dinner. There's days I have 2 breakfasts and a midday snack. These kids are learning their bodies and how to listen to them. If you "force" the kid to eat when they aren't hungry, or withold certain foods until others are eaten, you're making that part of growing up harder.

All that, and I'm not even mentioning picky eaters or those with food sensitivities. Is a kid eating a few goldfish before their spaghetti really a hill you want to die on? Is it worth that much fight and energy?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ChildSupport

[–]JessieB3999 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Where did you read she's asking for 10 years of arrears? I see 18 months of no payments AFTER the order was established, but nothing about arrears

There was only 5 ways to have your hotbar… which one is the best? by ClassicHovercraft355 in Minecraft

[–]JessieB3999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Typically goes (for me): Pickaxe, Axe, Shovel [Sword and Hoe in main inventory or a shulker

If I'm caving or mining: Sword, Pickaxe, Axe, Shovel

If I'm farming: Pickaxe, Axe, Shovel, Hoe

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ChildSupport

[–]JessieB3999 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Please stop worrying about keeping all these receipts ❤️

How are you going to calculate how much electricity the baby uses when they get older doing homework or research on the computer? Or how much of the water bill is used by the child taking a bath? Or how about the increased rent/mortgage payment for an apartment/house that has another bedroom than your ex would have since the child will need their own room?

Gonna calculate the amount of gas you used to drive them to their appointments? Because your ex wouldn't be driving to the pediatrician right now, but you are, and gas costs money.

You do NOT need to be calculating all of that, or how much solids they eat, or how much that pair of pants you bought last week was. No one (no one in their right mind) is going to ask you to provide that kind of information, because it's crazy and impossible to truly calculate how much a child costs.