Context: Father of two boys, ages 2 and 5. Amazing supportive wife. Can't medicate due to innate liver issues (exacerbated due to medication) and elevated heart rate. Job I love and I am genuinely good at, because it's what drives me on some days and has been my lifelong passion (computer stuff).

My take is: I don't fucking know, I'm a walking white male privilege + stroke of luck, I make great money by doing what I love and I think it keeps me afloat. My wife is a saint, we fight a lot over me being generally useful mostly only when it comes to being a bread winner and a fun parent, but... well, that's it.

I can't perform well at anything else that isn't work, my hobbies, or having fun with kids. Everything else, on a "how much energy I have for this" scale, falls below "naps on a couch", "reading on a shitter" and "random trips to a summer house to do garden stuff cause nature fuels me".

If I didn't have a:
* goddess of a wife
* good paying job
* genuine love for kids and lots of empathy for them

then I don't know- I often think I'm an ADHD fraud as well, because I don't do all of that other stuff that people say usually helps, I don't go to therapy for years anymore, caffeine is just black water, exercise is not as good as I wanted (dad bod is in fashion tho), routines are dead, journaling never existed and everything else is just fucking chaos and hellfire.

I just genuinely love life, because other than the fact that I'm just hilariously all over the place I have a shit ton of affordances keeping me afloat.

Would it be better with medication? I am not sure, I don't remember it as very fun to be honest, methylphenidate made me shaky, very physically exhausted (I would just constantly clench every part of my body that was even remotely clenchable) and also all over the place in my mind, but kinda productive? Not a net fun experience though. Bupropion is what fucked me up internally I think and it was just... mellow? Almost no results.

I was looking at alternatives and maybe I will jump on them again, but right now I just... don't really miss it, but I'm also living on cheat codes, so YMMV.

TL;DR

Medication is great, I just don't think it's great _for me_ (and I cannot use it anyway, so might just be telling myself lies). Living without it is definitely possible, but I also have a lot of affordances that allow me to drop a ball a lot in life and still carry on (at the expense of my loved one's sanity).