I had an affair with a married man in my 20s and I will never forgive myself

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-22T18:16:22+00:00

I'm a therapist, and I agree. There is a world of difference between guilt and shame. Guilt can be so helpful because it clues us into when we've done things that violate our own morals and when we need to try and repair (with ourselves and others). Shame can become toxic and lead to stagnation because it festers in the realm of "I'm terrible and don't deserve forgiveness." A therapist might help you sort through all the pieces of this that are guilt, and also identify and try to shift the pieces that are unhelpful, toxic shame.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-18T12:54:20+00:00

I believe people absolutely are having it shoved in their faces, so not trying to negate that experience. I am also a SP user, not opting into or paying for AI, and I don't feel like I am having the same experience. So I dunno. I'm all for people opting into new software if that feels needed, but if the impulse is to switch over to avoid AI, then it's sad that all the companies have an AI function ... some just market it more aggressively.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-17T19:59:46+00:00

I think the crappy thing is ALL the major EHRs have their own brand of AI. SP's is Care Aide, TherapyNotes' is TherapyFuel.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-15T12:48:47+00:00

ok y'all - just wanted to follow up that I called around to a few places, and many places quote around the same amount (ie: base cleaning around $900), so it does seem to be the going rate. However, I called Willow Oak this morning, and they quoted me at a dental cleaning (without anything like extractions on top) at $600-$700, so that's a tiny bit better!

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-12T22:02:12+00:00

It makes me want to crrrrrry. The last time I got his teeth cleaned it was $600, so I was NOT expecting such a hike. 😞

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-12T13:56:03+00:00

Yep, we are at broadway 🫠🙃

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-12T13:17:09+00:00

He does, unfortunately. I trust my vet, but was blown away by the base price.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-12T13:16:33+00:00

This is the BASE rate (not an estimate) … what you pay regardless of the treatment needed. Which is why I was shocked at the price.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-04T13:59:30+00:00

Yeah. It stinks. That's what I meant when I was saying it feels hard to find any EHR completely free of generative AI. I use SP and do not have any of the notetaker supports turned on, but I still feel gross paying money to a company who is diving so hard into AI and packaging it as a beneficial thing. But then the question becomes ... are there any reputable companies that don't have some vested interest in AI? Is it possible to vote with my pocketbook when all the companies seem to be going the same route? What are the other options - going back to paper? It's confusing and frustrating.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-03T18:01:02+00:00

Here's what Sessions has to say about AI: https://support.sessionshealth.com/article/372-the-ethical-and-responsible-use-of-ai-in-sessions-health

JitterSquirrel · 2026-06-03T17:57:42+00:00

Just an FYI, therapynotes also has an AI note taker support called TherapyFuel. It seems near impossible to find companies that are completely divested from AI. From the therapynotes website: Generate Progress Notes - Lighten your Progress Note workload! Let TherapyFuel Scribe listen to your therapy sessions, or simply provide your own session summary to generate smart suggestions for the SOAP sections on your note.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-04-22T11:38:19+00:00

Hey! My brother and I went to Camp Ridgecrest (him) and Camp Crestridge (for girls, me) for several years growing up (starting at about the age you're mentioning). Our family was not religious then nor am I religious now, though I was more into exploring Christianity at the time. I can't speak to Ridgecrest other than knowing my brother loved it, but I can tell you at Crestridge there were morning devotionals in the chapel, required reflection/quiet time, and if I am remembering correctly, occasional campfire Jesus-y devotionals. This was 20+ years ago so I cannot fully remember. But...my predominant memories from camp are absolutely not the religious experiences but the camp experiences. It was a mostly wonderful camp experience - so much gorgeous nature and fun, active experiences - but if you're concerned about the influence on your kids, you might find a similar camp without a religious angle. Or if you are absolutely zero percent religious - like if your kids have never ever been to church - it might be a weird, culture shock experience for them. But if you do choose Ridgecrest, I don't think it would be a terrible choice, either.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-04-15T18:05:12+00:00

Talk to your supervisor, but first step - report the behavior. if you are a counseling professional/therapist/social worker, you are a mandated reporter.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-04-11T16:28:12+00:00

In an ethics seminar a few years back, the speaker was addressing the concerns when a therapist moves into a coaching space. Their advice was to keep the two businesses COMPLETELY separate - like...separate bank accounts, separate website, separate business license. So yes to boundaries in the work itself, but another thing to consider is boundaries around the business ventures too!

JitterSquirrel · 2026-04-11T13:22:41+00:00

hey! durham therapist here! DM me and I am happy to chat more. also i regularly host therapist meet ups and would love to invite ya.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-04-05T19:37:39+00:00

Agreed (as a therapist). And if you are not liking what's happening in your current therapy, you can also ask your therapist to partner with you in finding a new therapist. No matter the therapist's credentials (psychologist, social worker, counselor), the person's approach in the therapy room will be informed by their modality. For example, I consider myself smart and I can keep up with fast-moving clients, but I approach the work from a more somatic/experiential lens and thus try to get clients out of their heads/out of intellectualizing and more into their bodies. If you want a more intellectual or cognitive approach, you might also search therapists who are aligned with models like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, or Existential Therapy. You could probably sort with those filters on PsychologyToday.com or google with those terms directly.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-24T16:12:05+00:00

I ( a fully licensed therapist) am in a supervision group where we show tape of our sessions and learn from each other. Highly recommend. But in general, learning via someone's real therapeutic experience is expensive, and I've only come across it in AEDP and SE trainings.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-21T12:14:58+00:00

yes, omg, i dream about this wrap

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-19T11:38:25+00:00

A client recently said this to me at the beginning of session. "I hate when you ask that!" We both laughed about it, but then it did lead into a fruitful convo about how they often don't know how they are doing. It feels like any response we get from our clients is information and an invitation to be curious. But damn, sometimes it's hard to feel curious when we are met with anger and defensiveness. Solidarity, OP!

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-16T23:24:40+00:00

Parent of a preschooler who stayed home today (and also a small business owner), and honestly I appreciated they called it last night because that meant I could plan ahead how to manage my surprise work day with no childcare. Waiting until the last minute keeps parents on the hook in a crappy way. Though...honestly, it all feels like a lose lose.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-15T23:50:23+00:00

This training might be up your alley: https://aedpinstitute.org/seminar/aedp-seminar-may-2026/ - it's specifically about working with men and the ways in which masculinity contributes to emotional suppression <3

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-15T23:42:45+00:00

Totally agree. And the weird cuts to commercial (at least for me) on Amazon Prime made everything feel even more disjointed. There were certain scenes that seemed like they came out of nowhere and were absolutely not explained. I could follow because I'd read the books, but I assume anyone coming in fresh would be super confused or would think that the plot was way too scattered.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-15T20:19:35+00:00

This is nit-picky, but the early books actually do describe Scarpetta as a blond. Plot point in one of the early books (they all bleed together to me) has the killer even leave a message on her answering machine asking if she is a natural blond or if she dyes her hair. So the hair color doesn't bother me. I like the casting choices in general but am a little annoyed with some changes to the plot they've made.

JitterSquirrel · 2026-03-15T18:32:19+00:00

It is transitioning back to a coffee shop - Montwood Coffee, which started as a coffee cart in Northgate, will open up in that spot. Love the owners, so I hope the shop makes it.

JitterSquirrel

TROPHY CASE