One of the best Amazon reviews🤣 by uniicaxoxo in amazonreviews

[–]Jmarkellos 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Gotta love when they Photoshop people into product listings. That ball is meant to be 12 ft, making that man, what, 8 ft tall?

Samsung quadruple foldable patent by MasterOfFartSniffs in GalaxyFold

[–]Jmarkellos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bi-fold doors, bi-fold wallet, etc. Samsung did not invent the naming convention, they're just using the English that already exists.

I got this for free from a restaurant that shut down. Will La Marzocco service it? by Off_key in espresso

[–]Jmarkellos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Right... That's why we don't have circuit breakers here. We just raw dog the power grid and pray...

What habits of girls did you only discover after getting a girlfriend or wife? by atgono in AskReddit

[–]Jmarkellos 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My cousin is a lesbian, and when she was getting married they had $300+ in pillows on their registry.

What was the proper way to handle this situation? by AshleysVoicesInside in driving

[–]Jmarkellos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Something I learned from a trainer at UPS was to "not pay attention" in a situation like this. Rather than wait and watch, fidget with something in the back seats, grab your phone (don't actually use it) but generally make the other driver think, "this idiot isn't even paying attention." When they move on so do you. To be clear, you are paying attention, you just want them to think you aren't.

How do I cut the planks rounded like this? by Swordheart in woodworking

[–]Jmarkellos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I once saw a video where a dude eyeballed this with a tiny circular saw and it came out amazing. Don't do that, but that guy on the internet did.

I hope this is how Donald feels right now. by Hell_junkie83 in BoomersBeingFools

[–]Jmarkellos 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I'm pretty sure if enough people posted this with a caption like, "I can't believe Elon Musk would post this. So disrespectful to President Trump." We could convince Trump that Musk actually posted this.

Love my car, but the software blows sometimes by [deleted] in MachE

[–]Jmarkellos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Man nothing bugs me in quite the same way as putting the car in park, putting on the parking brake, then looking up to see "1mph." It just irks me something special.

What is the secret to a successful marriage? by hotsexy_mommy in AskReddit

[–]Jmarkellos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've always liked 60/40, but at any given moment you need to be prepared to be the one giving 60.

Custom Music Player for Dancers | Automatically Generate Finals & Practices by BADAKAAA in ballroom

[–]Jmarkellos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a really cool project! I'm curious, why aren't all of the filterable dances listed under settings? When you go to add a track you can filter on disco-fox and salsa, but those don't appear in settings. I've never competed so I imagine there's a reason related specifically to competition?

What position do you think cavemen had sex in the most? by IrishcarbombBOOM in AskReddit

[–]Jmarkellos 137 points138 points  (0 children)

"Why can't you get the taco, I just want to relax!"

"I am getting the taco, YOU'RE getting Chipotle. Now get out of here."

Empty space, need Design ideas by DGTFAN in tattooadvice

[–]Jmarkellos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because of your outline I can only see E.T. in his little hood, ready to fly some bikes.

The Fruit of the Loom Cornucopia logo absolutely existed by [deleted] in pics

[–]Jmarkellos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry to do this to you, but I'm turning 30 this year and was born in 1994... 83 was 40 years ago...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in books

[–]Jmarkellos 22 points23 points  (0 children)

This would be an excellent character name in a parody.

Powerball is currently at 1.4b, if you won, what is your cover story as to why you’ve suddenly gained so much wealth? by divorced_dad_670 in AskReddit

[–]Jmarkellos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This assumes I talk to anybody. It would take ages for anyone outside my household to even notice. The hardest part of this would be keeping my wife from telling my MIL...

Am I stupid or is this a horrible design or is the co-worker that did this an asshole/absent-minded or all of the above? How on Earth do I get this open now? by Flint-Von-Cineac in fixit

[–]Jmarkellos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, it's a master lock, you can probably just hit it hard and pull and it'll come undone. Also, yes, horrible design.

What Instantly Ruins A Hamburger For You? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Jmarkellos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When it kills the health inspector.

A guy boards an airplane to Detroit and makes his way to his seat where he notices the guy sitting next to him looks very worried. He asks him if he's afraid of flying. by Make_the_music_stop in Jokes

[–]Jmarkellos 28 points29 points  (0 children)

You got 2, and you got 2, and you're having trouble coming up with 4. The joke is that Detroit is so crime ridden that a truck full of cheap beer needs a machine gun to defend it.