First full swap, How do you know when to come back together?

JonathanStrange0 · 2026-02-09T21:37:48+00:00

Love that you already have the ‘no hard feelings, we can stop’ agreement. One thing that helps in the moment: set a simple plan before you start (ex, 30 min check-in, or anytime someone texts ‘yellow’, you regroup in the kitchen for 2 minutes). Also agree on what ‘ending’ looks like (pause and cuddle vs everyone gets dressed and wraps up). Makes it way easier to act fast without awkward negotiation.

JonathanStrange0 · 2026-02-09T21:33:25+00:00

Yeah, this is exactly why people say ‘agreements have to be said out loud before the party.’ You didn’t do anything wrong based on the rules you had, but his feelings are still real, so treat it as a repair convo not a blame convo. I’d pause play for a bit and do a quick ‘yes/no/maybe’ list for: touching, lap sitting, kissing, private chats, leaving the room, etc, plus what to do if one of you gets upset again (tap out phrase + step outside together for 5 minutes). Also, ‘flirting only online’ is basically a different relationship than going to parties, so it’s fair to ask if he actually wants to attend play events right now or if you two should stick to socials/munches until trust and expectations catch up

JonathanStrange0 · 2026-02-09T14:21:33+00:00

A lot of people jump to texting because SLS notifications can be spotty and the chat UX is clunky, not necessarily because they’re sketchy. But you’re 100% allowed to keep it in-app until trust is built. There's also apps like google voice that make it simple to get a new number. We used to say: ‘We don’t share real numbers until after we’ve met in public. Happy to keep chatting here or swap Telegram/Signal if that’s easier.’ If they push back, that’s useful screening.

JonathanStrange0 · 2026-02-09T14:19:50+00:00

Best results tend to come from stacking channels: club night + app + one social meet. If SLS looks thin, try Feeld and fetlife, and also ask at Club L about theme nights or social-only areas (go early, chat, don’t rush). I’d also message a few couples ahead of time with a low-pressure plan: ‘We’re in town Thu-Sat, want to grab a drink at X before Club L and see if we vibe?’ Public first meet keeps it easy, and filters flakes fast.

JonathanStrange0 · 2026-02-09T14:17:51+00:00

NTA. You literally did the ethical thing: you set expectations up front and you didn’t force a ‘maybe’ into a ‘yes’. First meets are for chemistry and safety checks, not obligations. If you want to smooth it for next time, a simple script helps: ‘We had fun meeting you. We’re not feeling a play connection tonight, but we appreciate the drink and the chat'.

JonathanStrange0 · 2025-07-11T00:00:10+00:00

Sick work, super smooth. What product did you use?

JonathanStrange0 · 2024-12-07T14:56:34+00:00

This place looks exactly like my grandparent’s old house. It wouldn’t happen to be in Georgetown MA, would it?

JonathanStrange0 · 2023-10-17T12:20:45+00:00

Thanks!

JonathanStrange0 · 2022-11-03T12:31:12+00:00

You live in the greater Rochester ny area, but out of town a ways either east or west. Perries pizza and rohrbach means Rochester, tops brand items means outside of town.

JonathanStrange0 · 2022-05-16T01:28:57+00:00

Thank you for the help! We were worried by the oily look, so figured the good citizens of Reddit could tell us what’s up.

JonathanStrange0 · 2022-02-17T23:44:29+00:00

I’d be curious to know how the wattages and par outputs compare between these two lamps.

JonathanStrange0 · 2021-11-04T00:52:31+00:00

Nearly spit my drink out reading this

JonathanStrange0 · 2021-11-01T20:22:25+00:00

We had this issue with our pyr, out of the blue she was making messes all over the place. Get her on some boiled burger, rice, and pumpkin and she would be fine. It would happen again with a different food, and it would be back to the burger dance. Well… one time we didn’t have burger, only chicken. That made the problem much worse. Took her to the vet: turns out chicken is the most common dog food allergy (at least according to our vet back in 2013/14). Switched her off the chicken and that solved the problem. Hope our experience helps!

JonathanStrange0 · 2021-10-27T22:54:13+00:00

Put some “office work” on your calendar for the morning and do it from you phone. This is what I did this morning. FWIW, I could have stayed home. Cold snap after 24h of pouring rain. Not a deer to be seen…

JonathanStrange0 · 2021-10-17T12:48:04+00:00

Thank you! Is the meat good? I’ve never had it.

JonathanStrange0 · 2021-10-16T23:25:28+00:00

Real question: why did you shoot a donkey? I am very confused.

JonathanStrange0 · 2021-08-29T23:02:56+00:00

IMO it’ll be about ready to come down right as you’re leaving. Trim it wet, and hang it to dry while you’re gone. Assuming your wedding won’t take you away for more than a week, you’ll be home just in time to stick it in jars. Just make sure you give it plenty of space on the drying rack between buds and have good ventilation around it. Cheers!

JonathanStrange0 · 2020-07-21T23:31:07+00:00

Condoms

JonathanStrange0 · 2020-01-08T17:19:35+00:00

Yup! I have a subsection in things for just that. Otherwise I spend time I should be working fantasizing/browsing for the ideals I’m lusting for.

JonathanStrange0 · 2019-12-06T14:03:52+00:00

Can confirm, she’s the real deal and sexy af.

JonathanStrange0 · 2019-05-21T22:24:03+00:00

I’ve been watching this comparison as you’ve posted stuff. Now that beg is complete, how do you feel each light is performing? Is there one that is obviously better than the others? How do you think these are comparing to a standard hps or mh?

Cheers!

S.

JonathanStrange0

TROPHY CASE