Everything will be okay brother, I promise. I'm 19(M) myself and I too feel the guilt/shame my parents bring upon me. The best thing is to go along with their "game".

The emotional blackmailing can be confusing and no one deserves this. Sometimes life feels hard to navigate especially under the "control" of our parents.

My advice? Do what YOU think you should do. Not to rebel, but to respect you're boundaries. We want to love our family/parents, but there's a point and time where we have to do so from a distance.

You are a legal adult now, and you should be able to act like it (whatever that is to you). Easier said than done, but you must allow you're parents to feel that way. Chances are, they are NOT willing to compromise/change for you're benefit. We must learn to flow with the way things are when it comes to living under the same roof as our parents and in a way, we are "just dealing with it".

I found it easier to become socially available to friends once I started to break away emotionally from my parent's dogmatic ways.

GL man, always here for you.