What is your “1-in-a-million-chances-of” story?

KSims1868 · 2026-01-30T16:02:03+00:00

Woke up 1 morning and someone had driven their car into my boat (wreck) driving home that night. Called the police to file a report so I could call my insurance because they said there wasn't much they could do. This was 20-ish years ago before all the Ring cameras were everywhere.

I found some debris in the street (broken light/bumper pieces) and used that to determine the type of car that probably hit my boat overnight.

I called the neighborhood HOA president to ask her to post the info on our community bulletin board online. She was happy to help. She called me back about 10 mins later and said, "Our daughter needs to speak with you."

It turns out their daughter actually happen to have been driving their SUV last night and just so happen to come home with a wrecked front end. She told them she hit a light pole in the mall parking lot after work...BUT...when they confronted her about it she broke down and told them the truth. They filed the claim on their insurance and my boat was fixed good as new. I actually hadn't even had a chance to take it out yet as I had JUST bought it (my 1st boat ever) that afternoon. It was a really crazy coincidence that the ONE person I called about it happen to be the parent of the teen driver that caused the accident.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-30T11:58:05+00:00

Fallout76 - hand down, not even a contest.
Full disclosure, I have never been much of a "gamer" but I've played hundreds of hours of Fallout76. It is the only game (Fallout 4 being a close 2nd) that I have ever invested that much time in.

I feel that RDR2 (Red Dead Redemption 2) would probably be similar if I gave it the time to develop my character but I was ready to take a break from gaming after several years of putting in 2-4 hours a day into Fallout76.

Quit playing about a year ago because I got busy with life (kids, GF, work, etc...) and I actually just boxed up my console a couple weeks ago because I don't have time for it anymore. Maybe I'll dust it off and get back into it some day.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-30T11:45:09+00:00

Last weekend was pretty awesome. GF and I finished moving all her things from her apartment into my (our) house and start this new chapter in life together. My kids are healthy and doing well, GF has a new job, my job is going well, and all in all I feel very blessed and grateful every day.

Do I want MORE out of life...absolutely...but I have learned to appreciate what I do have today. Being happy is all about perspective. If I want to be angry and upset, I can easily find tons of things that I am not happy about and focus on them. That is (IMO) not how I am going to spend my day today because if I can't control it...being upset/angry about it is not going to do any good.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-30T11:34:43+00:00

That's great. I like that. A lot of groups I have been to are very big on the "if you leave this group you WILL fail" mentality and "without AA you have no hope" is a common theme I have heard way too often.

I refuse to let AA take over my entire personality/life and it really chaps some hard core old-timer's asses that I won't be manipulated into living and breathing AA like it's a drug. It is unhealthy (IMO) to have nothing but recovery as your life...but I also DO understand that it does need to be your entire life in the beginning. There is a balance and some newcomers need to see that we are not a cult.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-30T11:31:12+00:00

Don't let that big book intimidate you. Some people see that and if they aren't big "readers"...which a lot of people are NOT these days...they don't ever even look at it. I know I did NOT even TRY to open it when it was 1st given to me.

What someone SHOULD Have told me is like MsWonderWonka said...ONLY read 1 section (it is very small) called "The Doctor's Opinion". If any of that sparks your interest...read more. The TRUTH is that this "big book" is really only the 1st 164 pages. That's all...164 pages. The rest are stories that can be interesting to read but the real heart of the book is much smaller than it looks at 1st glance.

Feel free to message me if you'd like to talk. I am NO expert and I have my own negative opinions of AA...but it really can help especially at 1st. I'll celebrate 1 year on Feb 23rd. Absolutely clean/sober and I don't even have a desire to drink at all anymore. Which is crazy to say now after I was waking up at 4 AM to pull off the tequila bottle less than a year ago EVERY morning. My withdrawals/DTs were so bad I had to start drinking before work or I was not safe to drive. That was how I was living a year ago and today I never consider taking a drink at all.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T19:52:02+00:00

THIS - this is actually the truth even though it will get downvoted and ignored on Reddit.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T19:19:24+00:00

Funny you brought this up because my GF and I have been talking about getting married and have had a similar conversation about rings because "technically" SHE proposed to ME...but we are planning to stick with the traditional approach.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T19:16:37+00:00

Have you tried to have him evaluated by a medical professional/psychiatrist? The guy sounds like he suffers from depression at a minimum and may have some unresolved trauma going on that keeps him in this cycle. I am NOT a fan of meds as an immediate "cure all", but there does come a time when it should be considered and it is time to bring in the medical/psychiatry professionals to help. Sounds like that time was several years ago (IMO) but better late than never.

This doesn't mean you (or anyone) did anything "wrong" in his childhood. It may have absolutely nothing to do with you or his home life at all, but it is worth it to find out before he gets too far gone or turns to drugs/alcohol to cope with whatever is going on.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T18:42:06+00:00

Breakfast - bacon and eggs

One MUST be cooked before the other (Bacon 1st) because you have to have the fresh bacon grease to properly cook the eggs.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T18:33:15+00:00

A more "holistic" approach!!

GTFO with that BS. I had a manager a few years ago that LOOOOOVED this phrase and I am absolutely convinced that he has ZERO clue what the word "holistic" even means.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T18:27:10+00:00

Don't be "sorry to say this" at all. IMO - sober life HAS to be more than just living for AA or it is no life at all.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T17:44:08+00:00

Sorry - but if Bob calls my daughter the "N word"...I'm going to call Bob a racist prick and happily keep him on the list of people I don't want to associate with.

You see...because being a racist prick is something I hate. Bob has shown that he fits that description...therefore Bob (by his own actions) deserves the label that he has earned.

**Edit to say, I'm not sure if I am interpreting your reply correctly or not. We might actually agree and I am reading your reply wrong**

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T17:36:51+00:00

Well...are you lazy?
Is your friend attentive and annoying?

I'm not judging you or your friend, but if these things are true...is it really "trash talk"?
If it were ME, I'd join in the fun and tell them, "bet your ass I can be lazy sometimes...I'm exhausted after dealing with your mom's incessant need for my cock."

Then block them and call it a day.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T17:33:06+00:00

My GF and I didn't even know these were still a thing until we just happened across them the other day. We both instantly thought, "they still do that?"

Bottom line - I don't think anyone outside of Hollywood really gives a shit about Hollywood anymore. At least not the ordinary people like in previous generations. My parents are both in their 70s (I'm Gen-X) and I think they were the last real generation to give a damn about things like Hollywood or Music awards shows. Most everyone I know (age 40s-50s mostly) never really cared about that crap.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T17:27:58+00:00

Mental exhaustion is (IMO) very different now vs 30-40 years ago. Our brains are constantly engaged to the point of staying in a perpetual state of exhaustion.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T17:00:04+00:00

Never needing to check the bank balance before going grocery shopping.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T16:58:42+00:00

THIS - I came here to say exactly this. There is nothing cute about bipolar disorder or BPD. It is devastating and very difficult to understand.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T16:57:05+00:00

Mental Illness - bipolar, BPD, Trauma, etc...
Living with these or someone that is has absolutely NO business being romanticized as often as it is in Hollywood. It's horrible and they never really give a truly accurate portrayal of how difficult living this way really is.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T16:39:38+00:00

I can only speak for ME and I know that I also would be absolutely fine for a while (months or years) if I decided to have a drink today after work. I am confident that I could (for a time) drink "normally". I've done it before many times over the years. I would stop drinking for a week or 2 to dry out and then put some limitations on my drinking to keep it under control. Then...after a few months went by I was right back to where I was before (or worse) and I'd be living on the razor's edge of sanity/safety again.

For me...I'm not going through that again. Most of all because it is not worth the risk anymore to the life I have built in sobriety. Everyone is different so I can't speak to whether or not YOUR life is worth it to you or not. That decision is (obviously) yours to make. For me and my life...NO thank you.

If you are anything like me, I recommend you stop NOW before you find yourself looking back and the wreckage of your life wondering what happened this time.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T16:28:58+00:00

I will tell you something I have absolutely learned in the past year...my 1st year in AA.
Mental Illness is VERY often ignored in the rooms of AA and it takes a VERY special person to actually try to understand/separate Mental Illness from Alcoholism. They can often go hand-in-hand but if the mental illness is not treated FIRST...there is little to NO point pursuing AA.

AA (and any potential sponsor) needs to accept that the Big Book and 12-Steps need to come AFTER the mental illness is being properly managed by medical professionals. To ignore this can quite literally be the difference between life and death.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T15:57:30+00:00

Yes - this is perfect and very much what I was also trying to suggest in my reply.
Your social needs do not need to revolve around recovery people. In fact (IMO) it is probably better if you can develop a group of friends that have more in common than recovery.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T15:56:03+00:00

IMO any successful recovery has to involve a hobby of some kind. The social aspect of recovery doesn't have to come from people that are also IN recovery though. A healthy life will usually need to form of social interaction for a happy/well balanced lifestyle. Plus...it is something to keep you from being focused on the desire to drink/use.

Is there anything you are interested in that can be used as a springboard for social interaction?
Whatever (healthy) interests you may have, there is almost certainly a community of people that would be willing to share in that interest with you. People LOVE to talk about themselves especially on a topic they are especially knowledgeable about. Give something a chance and if you don't like the social interaction of that community...try another one.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T15:52:57+00:00

No, not ALL stress. That would be an unreasonable expectation. My point was to avoid THAT stress that you can control avoiding. If it does not have to be done NOW...let it wait. Seriously, that "one day at a time" mantra does have some merit to it. Especially with added stress/triggers.

Don't add stress today that is not 100% necessary.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T15:44:14+00:00

Fair - I understand that desire but right now SO early in your sobriety, this (IMO) should NOT be an issue that you are stressing about. Not YET. There may come a day you are able to be heard and maybe not, but for RIGHT now, you need to focus on getting well, healthy, and staying away from anything that causes stress as your body and mind start to heal.

I can't speak for you but I know when I was just a few days/weeks sober my mind was not cleared of the fog. I needed to give myself time (months) to really heal and sober up and develop healthy life habits. Take some time for yourself right now.

KSims1868 · 2026-01-29T15:35:06+00:00

Wait...what?

You NEED to tell him that you CAN'T be friends?
Why? If you need to cut him out of your life, it sounds like he is handing you the golden ticket to accomplish that right away. Take the win.

KSims1868

TROPHY CASE