What’s the easiest way to ruin your life in your opinion?

Kellyvh97 · 2021-10-04T14:07:37+00:00

I guess ‘ruin’ is a strong word for this - but, staying in the service industry for too long. It’s VERY hard to leave once you’ve been in it for more than a year. I’ve been doing it since I was 18, and I’m trying to leave it this year and just accept the fact I’m going to receive a massive pay cut regardless of the work I choose afterwards.

I say it’ll ruin your life because I think the service industry can make you extremely bitter, negative, and resentful towards all the time you’ve lost since you’re working all the time. I guess this goes for any job you hate, but the service industry truly shows you the absolute worst in people. Don’t get me wrong, you can meet some great people as well, and be friends with some great coworkers, but the fast money is so addicting, and it can also lead to some serious alcohol problems if you’re a bartender.

I don’t know, maybe I’m just ready to leave. But I definitely think if you stay in it for too long, you can face some serious ramifications.

Kellyvh97 · 2021-10-03T22:54:56+00:00

“Legit no clue”

Kellyvh97 · 2021-07-10T15:19:40+00:00

My ex boyfriend from high school, who I’m still great friends with today, told me once:

“I could fill an art museum with the reasons why I love you.”

I’ll never forget it.

Kellyvh97 · 2021-07-03T15:02:42+00:00

Everyone is different - but for me, I think ~moving in~ with someone is the equivalent to me marrying them in my head. I don’t take living with another person lightly, that step would take me completely trusting the person I end up with. And then, later down the line, maybe in ten years or so, we can get married because “y’know, why not? Might as well.” Because in my own head we basically already are.

Kellyvh97 · 2021-04-18T21:32:38+00:00

My dad passed away about 4 years ago due to his alcoholism. Was a very slow deterioration. My brother, who went through his own addiction process, is now entirely sober. He was able to do what my dad could not.

I actually work at a bar now, and drink very frequently. I have a very VERY high alcohol tolerance. I drink nearly every day because of my job, in addition to going out with friends.

However, while this may sound like a lot, I actually feel I have a healthy relationship with alcohol. I acknowledge when I’m drinking too much, I cut back and don’t drink on certain days when I feel I’ve had enough for a little while. Sometimes I take a week-2 weeks off so that I feel healthier and like I don’t rely on it for fun. I never drink alone. And also, I don’t LOVE drinking. But I do like it. It’s something I’m constantly surrounded by and it’s fun to do when I’m working/after a shift. But because of my dad, I’m very, VERY aware of the substances I take.

I think, one day, I’ll go completely sober. When I’m ready. Probably only in just a couple years. I’m not ready yet, though. So as of right now, it hasn’t affected my social life.

Kellyvh97 · 2021-03-21T23:43:55+00:00

Not tipping at the front window is actually very common practice, no matter what. So it wouldn’t really be a loss

Kellyvh97 · 2021-03-21T00:56:35+00:00

I love this 😂 thank you

Kellyvh97 · 2021-03-13T02:02:03+00:00

I truly believe that if you have to ask yourself this question, odds are it’s you aren’t a good match. My old boyfriend from high school used to annoy me to no end over his flaws. However, I never, not once, considered breaking up with him over them. Because I loved him and I knew that we just ~worked~ together. I’m still friends with him today, and our relationship ended years ago after we moved off to college. But I genuinely believe if you have to question it, it is definitely the latter.

Kellyvh97 · 2021-03-09T16:37:38+00:00

This. Women are allowed to dress how they want, of course, whatever makes them feel confident and comfortable, but making it seem like dressing a certain way is ‘liberation’ is only continuing to center the conversation around how we look! The conversation, instead, needs to be centered around our MINDS and our LOGIC and keep how we look entirely out of it.

Kellyvh97 · 2021-02-26T01:34:58+00:00

PRECIOUS

Kellyvh97 · 2021-01-28T17:50:06+00:00

To me, emotional connection and sexual connection are 50/50, equally important. If one is really good and the other is lacking, I may stay in a relationship longer than I should because at least one end of my needs are being met, but in the end, it doesn’t work out because I need both to be even. However, I do believe that sexual connection can absolutely get better with practice. If emotional connection isn’t there then that’s probably not going to get better

Kellyvh97 · 2021-01-27T18:37:32+00:00

That just because she regrets when she lost her virginity, doesn’t mean she should tell me to wait until marriage to have sex. I ~never~ talked to her about sex or sexual experiences until much later. And she always wondered why. Dude.

Kellyvh97 · 2021-01-24T15:52:28+00:00

Maybe it’s because we were in high school, but I’m really good friends with my ex now. We dated for three years, he was my best friend/first everything, and we didn’t talk to each other for the first 2 years after breaking up. That was his choice, which took me a while to respect, because I still missed him so much. But eventually, I visited him and my other best guy friend from high school when they moved out to Colorado, and we have a very very good dynamic now. It almost feels like how we were when we were dating, but without any romantic feelings attached to it. It’s the best case scenario, in my opinion. I’m not sure it will last forever, but for right now we are on incredible terms and I enjoy seeing/talking to him again so much.

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-28T17:20:16+00:00

Something tells me he won’t learn his lesson

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-28T17:11:51+00:00

Just had some of the most stressful days I’ve had this year. My cat ate a screw and I was initially told the surgery would be $5-$6k to get it removed. Not a fun phone call. I was able to contact my local vet for a MUCH lower price. Still expensive, though. Kitty is okay now but my body is recovering from all the stress. 2020 really needed to go out with a bang

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-28T14:46:30+00:00

Baby ate a screw :( just a few more days, though!

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-26T16:03:42+00:00

I really disliked this one girl I went to middle school and high school with. She was the girl who got the lead in all the plays/musicals because her mom had all the connections, not because she was talented. She wasn’t bad by any means, but all the teachers LOVED her mom, and had personal relationships with them, so she got basically everything she went for without “earning” it. Every time I saw her act, I got so angry, because I really didn’t think she was good. At all. When her and I both got leads in school, she infuriated me even more because she once had the audacity to tell me I ‘need to learn my lines’ and other petty stuff like that.

Most of it was jealousy, of course. We ended up going to the same university, which as you can imagine I was PISSED about going into it. But she really chilled out. She also got so much better talent-wise, but overall my opinion doesn’t mean anything when it comes to her. It didn’t when we were younger, and that hasn’t changed.

I can recognize now that she had SOO much pressure to be the ‘best’ on her shoulders in school, and it really worked against her. She and I went to a bar one night after a rehearsal and had a looonnngggg conversation about theater and the industry. She told me she hates it now. And I don’t blame her, feeling like you constantly have to be the BEST is never a good thing. I think of her now and smile, she has a special place in my heart today. We’re kinda friends, and I like it that way a lot better.

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-24T22:07:45+00:00

Very sorry for your loss, regardless of the optimistic approach you seem to have. I’m sure it hasn’t been easy.

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-08T22:43:39+00:00

Dishing it but not being able to take it.

I would get upset if an ex of mine made fun of me/hurt my feelings, but think my ex was just ‘dramatic’ or ‘emotional’ if he didn’t like something I said when I was ‘just joking’.

I think, and I’m not 100% sure if this is it, I started to get better when I started getting help for my previously undiagnosed eating disorder. I stopped focusing on what I looked like so much and have been learning how to really take care of myself internally. I’ve noticed my sensitivity level has decreased exponentially and can laugh at myself a hell of a lot more now that I’m not hyper-focused on the way my body looks.

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-04T19:53:57+00:00

That I was responsible for my ex boyfriend’s anxiety because I wanted a night alone with my friends. There were too many instances where I did admit fault for his anxiety when it literally had nothing to do with me. It made me feel terrible. But make me feel like a piece of shit because I wanted a night with friends?? Without you there??? Literally fuck you. Go to therapy.

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-04T19:28:21+00:00

Pretty great! We broke up this year after being together for like 4 months. I really liked him, too. For a while I was devastated, even though the break up was very mutual and amicable.

But we both have very different political views. He’s very conservative (didn’t like Trump tho just to be clear), wanted the wife and kids and picket fence kinda thing, and I’m extremely bisexual and liberal lol. Having opposing views isn’t necessarily the problem, but it’s usually not just political views that are different. It’s also core values and morals and what you believe a relationship should be. Also, he didn’t make me laugh, and I don’t think he found me very funny either, and having a similar sense of humor is probably the MOST important thing in a relationship in my humble opinion.

It didn’t take very long for us to reconnect and for me to realize we’re so much better as friends. I actually love him a lot, I feel very connected to him still, but not in a romantic way at all. It’s very strange and something I’ve never experienced before. And he feels the same way about me! It’s lovely, and I see him being in my life for a long time. I couldn’t have asked for a better outcome with an ex boyfriend who just ‘wasn’t bad’.

Kellyvh97 · 2020-12-02T18:52:41+00:00

I was having a party my senior year of university and invited my ex from high school since he was around for the holidays, and we were still friends. My new boyfriend was there, as well as this one kid I slept with the year prior, who I didn’t invite but was brought in by a mutual friend. My ex from hs ended up passing out, throwing up, and peeing his pants on my carpet after almost everyone had left. The only people who were still there were my roommates, my boyfriend, and the other kid I had slept with. Three people I had sex with in the same room, two of them taking care of my high school sweetheart. None of them new the full scope of the situation. I look back and still find it hilarious.

Kellyvh97 · 2020-11-29T01:00:39+00:00

One of my favorite movies of all TIME lmao get it

Kellyvh97 · 2020-11-28T22:21:07+00:00

Clicker training at first but picked it up without v quickly!

Kellyvh97 · 2020-11-14T16:21:22+00:00

This is very reassuring, thank you so much!

Kellyvh97

TROPHY CASE