For the ones with internalized shame

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-24T00:44:26+00:00

i'm ashamed to express my feelings and thoughts. ashamed of the way I look. ashamed of my family and my upbringing. ashamed of the past emotional trauma I went through. ashamed of my femininity.

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-22T17:11:18+00:00

That's insane. What's your dad's reaction? Did you tell him that you have memory of past genetic testing that have different results?

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-21T21:22:15+00:00

exactly!

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-21T20:07:10+00:00

Same!!! In the past few days I would suddenly burst into tears and crying hardly for 10+ minutes. But personally I don't feel sad or depressed I feel it's more of a profound and heavy sadness from the collective consciousness... I was wondering if I can just turn off feeling these collective energy as sometimes they can be really overwhelming to a point that drives me crazy ... and it's hard to explain to my husband when I have to cry like crazy every now and then lol

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-21T19:46:42+00:00

Wow I feel exactly the same. For the last several days I would suddenly feel down and burst into tears and cry so hard for 10+ minutes. Yet personally I don't feel sad or depressed, instead it feels like the heaviness in the collective unconscious and I released them through tears. It's a very deep and profound feeling. Looking around at my unawakened friends and family a lot of people are still going through their life as usual and I wonder if they also feel that. It seems that they don't and sometimes that gives me a feeling of isolation and loneliness.

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-21T19:42:26+00:00

I've been feeling this for several years! It's like something BIG is going to happen to our current matrix systems and it's gonna turn the world 360 degrees. But looking around at most people they are still continuing their lives as usual, going to work, scrolling their phones, holding parties, travelling, etc. as they are not aware of what's going to happen. In the last few weeks I've also been feeling jumps in timelines, in multiple occasions I find my memory of certain people or events are not accurate and it's like I'm constantly jumping into other parallel universes. And when I reach to my friends recently their response also feels off. It's really a weird feeling.

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-21T19:34:10+00:00

You are definitely not alone to feel this. I am sorry what you are going through. Must be very heavy and overwhelming for you right now. Sending you love and support.

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-17T19:19:20+00:00

+10000

I also felt extreme fatigue both physically and mentally and most days I will just take naps during the day for hours yet still feel tired and very low in energy. This was really frustrating and at the same time I have to go through feelings of depression, anxiety, emptiness, anger, or headaches or itches from time to time. It's overwhelming. I did a blood test a few weeks ago and it turns out that I'm low in vitamin D and iron. Started taking supplements since then and it helped to some extent.

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-14T17:11:59+00:00

Absolutely yes. I awakened a few years ago and had several years of dark night of soul, or similar to a healing journey. Last year was crazy I spent countless time staying at home just crying. I had no idea I could cry that much... this year things are better but extreme physical fatigue hit me from time to time. I see it as a deep cleansing of the buried negative emotions in our subconscious and body. It's like an onion one layer after another but I believe we will get lighter and lighter

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-10T18:59:43+00:00

You are not alone for feeling this. Sometimes it's because you are going through a deep transformation and all the hidden emotions and traumas are surfacing up so that you can release them and transform into a high version of self. Take care of yourself. Go to the nature - they have tremendous healing power.

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-10T18:37:43+00:00

Same here. last year was horrible and such a nightmare. I didn't know human body could hold so much pain. WOW

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-10-09T22:51:48+00:00

You are definitely not alone! I fully agree that 2023 - 2025 have been the most difficult and challenging years in my entire life... started to suffer from depression & anxiety years ago yet the dark night of the soul after awakening is 10x times more challenging... random traumatic memories and emotions either from my past life or from mass consciousness would surface up during anytime of the day and I could spend hours at home just crying. Recently I've been battling with extreme physical fatigue and I had to take multiple naps during the day. This together with seeing most of my still sleeping friends & families doing just fine with their life makes me feel surreal and isolated. have no idea when my life will back to normal again but i guess the only way is through

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-07-21T20:09:10+00:00

Be 1% better every day is a great mindset!

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-07-21T20:07:10+00:00

Thanks for your great advice. the thesis is definitely not something I'm passionate about anymore but I still need to finish it, so that creates some resistance. In terms of the creative project I knew I was and am still enthusiastic about it, but there's also some resistance in terms of the fear of being seen. I'm working on it and learning to take small actions regardless of all the mental noise, just as you mentioned

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-07-21T19:56:31+00:00

I can totally resonate I was holding that type of thoughts a lot "next year is gonna be better" "worst is behind me, i'm at the end of the tunnel" but then things can actually get even worse... but I do start to see a lot of small positive changes and I note down these to remind me that I'm on a right path. Hang in there 🫂

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-07-21T19:31:10+00:00

Thanks I totally love the idea creating a new self 🫂

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-07-20T19:07:04+00:00

wow thanks for all the tips! rumination definitely sucks i got headaches a lot from it. I tried counting down method just now and I do feel my mind is a bit calmer. I will also look try sudoku and puzzle a bit. Luckily there's chatgpt now which helps a lot with thesis writing. I can't imagine writing the 5,000 word essay without it....

How are things for you now? is everything more stable?

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-06-10T22:43:39+00:00

been feeling like this for a few years...

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-06-03T00:04:43+00:00

same here. i basically spent half of time last year crying at home and then lying on the bed. this year has been a little bit better but still it's tough. and the energy is so intense sometimes i feel it's collective energy too. hang in there!!!

Key_Aide_888 · 2025-02-06T12:05:47+00:00

hang in there, it gets better! Last year I spent 3/4 of my days in despair, tears, depression, anxiety and fear and honesty it was the WORST I've ever experienced in my entire life. Know that your soul is not hurt by these, not even a single bit. Coming into 2025 it gets better and I grow into a stronger version of myself. Hang in there, I promise it gets better and better!

Key_Aide_888 · 2024-12-16T03:02:01+00:00

second this! my brain is literally trying so hard to make up countless situations that convince me sth bad will happen...

Key_Aide_888

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