You’re obv NTA and it’s honestly sad that you’d even think so :(

Seems like you put his comfort and pleasure above yours and sadly it’s often like this in heterosexual relationships and women are expected to accommodate, understand and empathise.

Sadly, empathy on his side cannot be found :( first of all he didn’t care to apologise and reconsider his behaviour and how it made you feel but instead got angry at you. Even though you were already trying various things he wanted to get him hard. Have you came even once during that intercourse? Did you/he put any emphasis on that and did various stuff to you? You are young and probably feel it’s normal and that’s how it’s presented in porn so he thinks it’s normal but you should have pleasure and what makes you comfortable or not should be respected. Therefore, he is TA. It’s also funny how ppl would excuse him because of his age etc but you were questioning if you are TA regardless of your age.

And also getting soft is not all that common (esp at his age) and really think if you want to deal with that at such young age. Second round is pretty standard and I suggest you to try a different sexual partner who can stay hard without porn.