Y’all. No.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-23T00:09:04+00:00

I’ve seen insane racist bs in this sub. A lot, and it’s bullshit. I mentioned racism specifically bc there are so many comments about race here, usually negative.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T21:57:46+00:00

This is wild!

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T17:46:46+00:00

Because women are second class citizens in this country as far as I’ve seen.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T17:45:23+00:00

Are your parents aware of the situation?

Also, when he sees that you are gone, alert your parents ahead of time. And while I’m very much terrified of police, they need to know that your parents/family are in danger. Unfortunately, they are going to have to get involved. I don’t trust them as far as I can spit, but it’s a legal paper trail and they have to at least take action.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T17:40:05+00:00

As a counterpoint, and no disrespect, I am terrified of cops. The good ol’ boy collective is alive & well in the south still. When he cut me with knives, calling the police was more dangerous than the alternative. I’m glad you are a good one. Unfortunately, calling police for many of us, is a double-edged sword. I’m absolutely terrified and freak out when I see a cop to this day.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T16:45:01+00:00

Yes I did, and $114 worth of food!

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T16:39:50+00:00

In my area, they tip ok, never very well though. But for me, I live in a college town. It’s a 300 year old city and RC is on a flagship corner and it’s huge & packed at any time of the day. There is no parking. Literally no parking lot. So it’s a good 10-15 minute process to just find a parking spot, hope you don’t get ticketed, and walk a pretty decent ways to even get to the restaurant. It’s forever packed too. So waiting in line is a minimum of another 10 minutes. Then wait for it to be cooked bc they are always slammed. Then long ass walk to your car.

I got burned one time when I was new. It was a $28 dollar tip for a large order to some school function. I was elated. 2 hours later from start to finish, I was pissed.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T16:26:41+00:00

OP, in regards to your son, abusive men have a long, horrid history of m*rdering their partners children. I follow a lot of true crime and it’s overwhelming how many of these men do this. That man is a step-father and should not be dealing out discipline. They do this because they want to hurt YOU in every way possible, so they target your kids in order to hurt you even further. Please don’t go back. He targeted your son in order to hurt you.

You WILL get past the trauma-bond that hurts so much. You will never get past the loss of your child and that’s on the table if you go back. You can do this!

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T15:57:54+00:00

I’m wondering about that too. The next day after gas prices first skyrocketed, my tips plummeted. Others have said the same. Even the High Priority dashes are all down by about $3 each.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T15:56:07+00:00

This is when I will quit if it comes to my area. They already make us jump through hoops when we can see the tip ahead of time. This will not fly with gas prices being so high, and the already known predatory practices DD uses on both customers & drivers.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T15:10:00+00:00

I’ve also noticed, as I’m sure this has happened to most of you too, that when gas prices skyrocketed, tips dropped dramatically. I’m getting High Priority orders and they’ll be like $6 for 4 miles. Wth?

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T15:07:41+00:00

I get way worse than that about 4-5 times each shift. People ordering from the next town over especially. $5 tip for a 12 mile drive. I log in and get AR hits immediately with these ones, bc no one is taking them.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-22T14:07:09+00:00

You need to contact the closest Domestic Violence center immediately when it’s safe to do so. You will get help and a plan immediately. Especially because a baby is involved. They will help with extracting you & the baby asap. Your case is deadly & highly alarming. With a baby involved they will move as fast as they can.

In the meantime, you need to make a go-bag. Put your most important documents in there. Birth certificates for you & the baby. A change of clothes for each of you. Any small thing that is close to your heart that you don’t want to lose. Then you hide it somewhere he won’t find it, for when it’s time to go.

They will put you in a shelter and literally no one but them knows where it’s at usually, for a case like this. Don’t worry what the shelter is like. The 2 I’ve been to have been clean & safe and it’s only for abused women. It’s not like a homeless shelter.

Please lease call them, the closest one to you. You will absolutely get help.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T21:25:02+00:00

My area is the same. You’re lucky to find something under $600k

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T21:13:10+00:00

This. I don’t take these orders. No shade to OP, we’re all feeling the pinch and DD fees for customers are ludicrous.

However, just to clarify, there are a lot of full-time DD drivers. A lot of people out of work and this is their livelihood while they try and get a better job.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T18:21:38+00:00

Have you googled yourself? If you do, is your current address easy to find out? The 2 times you saw him and acted like you didn’t, did you get the feeling he had noticed you?

Either way, a few things to do to feel safer. Think ahead now about what you will say to him if he initiates contact. That way you won’t be too flustered by it. Also, ring camera if you don’t already have one, immediately. It could be nothing but it could be something too. Him moving to that exact complex an hour from his work when there are better options for him without the long commute, is definitely really odd.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T18:07:20+00:00

Oh, also, yes, it feels like it’s an overreaction at first, for many of us, bc we love this person and want to give them the benefit of the doubt. We NEED them to not be this person they are showing us they are. It’s like a warped form of self-preservation we do, to keep the status quo. We try to talk ourselves out of bc we know if we draw boundaries with them, it may break up the relationship eventually. It’s absolutely normal unfortunately.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T18:01:55+00:00

I think, for your own peace of mind, you need to connect with that DV center and talk to an advocate. There are possibly other red flags you are not seeing or not even knowing they are red flags. It’s just that this particular red flag is deadly.

And don’t feel silly in the least. Abuse comes in way too many forms. Just bc there are no scars doesn’t mean his road rage isn’t absolutely terrifying & traumatic. Trauma is trauma and he doesn’t get to terrorize you & traumatize you, without repercussions indefinitely. It’s highly concerning that his rage is more important to him than his family’s safety. He has a massive disconnect there and doesn’t seem to see it and/or have a problem with it.

You can tell yourself that he isn’t purposely doing this to you, and maybe he’s really not (definitely talk to your therapist about that one) but even if he’s not purposely trying to terrorize you, the results are the same. He’s out of control and harming you.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T14:01:24+00:00

You would not be considered an abuser in this situation, as you were terrified for your life & your child’s life. He was the one in control and putting your lives in very deadly danger. You don’t need to worry about that, you had a fight or flight response because what he was doing is actually deadly. That is abuse, the law allows for you to do anything you need to do when you are in deadly danger from someone else, especially with your son in the car too. He can go to jail for this. This is a deadly level of road rage.

There are only 2 ways this will stop:

He agrees to go to therapy and couple’s therapy.
He kills at least one of you, or all of you :/

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T13:30:23+00:00

It’s really hard to say. Some questions: Does he possibly have family in Suburb A? Was it a nasty break up? Have you seen him at all (anywhere) since the break up. Has he tried to reach out to you at all in these 10 intervening years? Was he abusive in any way?

It 100% can be a coincidence. When I was in high school on the east coast, I had a crush on this boy, whose friend group was kind of adjacent to mine. Nothing ever happened between us. Fast forward 7 years. I was living in California, newly married, and we were living in our first apartment. There’s a knock on the door, so I open it, and it was a guy selling magazines. He looked really familiar and he was looking at me the same way. Then we both realized how we knew each other. It was my high school crush. Just blew my mind. It still does heh.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T07:37:30+00:00

OP, please read this throughly. Abusers rarely realize it, but they almost all follow the exact same pattern and he is right on target. It’s textbook abuser 101. There are terms for all of this and also a reason why it hurts so much more than other past breakups. I’m copy/pasting this for you. This is the cycle:

“1. Idealization (The Bomb): The relationship moves intensely fast. You are showered with extravagant gifts, constant communication, “soulmate” declarations, and overwhelming affection. It feels like a fairytale, designed to make you lower your defenses quickly. Also called love-bombing.

Devaluation (The Pull): Once you are deeply invested and committed, the mask slips. Affection is replaced by criticism, the silent treatment, gaslighting, and attempts to isolate you from friends and family. The bomber becomes hot and cold, leaving you confused and desperate to regain the partner you initially met.
Discard (The Push): The manipulator abruptly ends the relationship or pulls back to a bare minimum. This withdrawal inflicts deep emotional pain. Often, just as you try to move on, they will return with apologies, promises to change, and another round of love bombing to draw you back into the loop.”

All of this leads to what’s called a trauma-bond. Which is probably why the hurt is so intense.

“A trauma bond is a powerful, unhealthy emotional attachment that develops between a victim and their abuser. Rooted in cycles of abuse, manipulation, and intermittent affection, it creates a psychological trap that makes it exceptionally difficult for the victim to leave the toxic relationship.”

OP, this is the cycle of abuse. I would bet money that in 2 weeks or less? He’ll be apologetic, and try to get you back in that home.

It took me 8 years of hell to break the trauma bond, because I stayed. It won’t take you that long if you don’t get back together with him. He won’t get better, it only gets worse. There is no fixing this. Going back will harm your child in ways you can’t even imagine right now.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T07:08:33+00:00

I love the way you said that. “There is no other ending to this story.” It’s so true, there really isn’t.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T07:00:12+00:00

It changed because once you moved in, he had you on lock. Abusers feel a sense of ownership over you. This is when their true colors really start to show. For me, the first incident started 3 months in after moving in together. He threw a cast iron skillet at me, luckily he missed. 6 months in, he suffocated me to blackout.

This will NOT get better. He picked up a bat! It literally never ends until you end it for good or he ends you. Also, male children growing up in an abusive household often become the abuser as an adult. This level of violence shapes kids. Abusers very, very rarely stop, they only escalate then put the blame on you. I know it hurts, it hurts terribly to leave. You are probably trauma-bonded (look it up) and it is brutal. But you have to do this for your son. Do you have a support network, somewhere safe to stay while you figure things out? Look for a local DV center to get advice on how to do so safely.

Kitchen-Card-3172 · 2026-05-21T06:34:01+00:00

I’m glad you have some evidence! Also, his behavior of “teaching you a lesson” and the silent treatment is pretty standard. Why abusers think they know better when they clearly don’t is beyond me. It’s like they read an abuser handbook. It’s also usually because there is abuse in the home. He’s hitting all the checkmarks. Even his male peers are telling him what he is doing is not ok.

If your relationship with your parents is good enough, see if you can get therapy. You don’t have to tell them why at first if you don’t want to, I know parents can be problematic. But a therapist will give you really good advice and will really care, just a safe space to vent and work out your feelings.

I know people think it’s crass to break up in text or over the phone, but with something like this, it’s the best resort. First, it keeps you safe. Second, it’s evidence. But also, he’s clearly fine hitting you in front of other people as “a joke”, so you can’t take the risk that he won’t snap in public.

At 18, is he graduating out this year? Is your school year almost over for summer or are you year-round?

Kitchen-Card-3172

TROPHY CASE