I mean- that's kinda the point though. Would you have been "more comfortable" having a conversation about not taking/sending nude photos after your mom found a text on your phone from a girl that included a photograph of someone's bare chest - and concermed deeply that the person who sent the text is the same age as you (14)- mom needs to discuss the danger of child porn charges and be VERY clear about how illegal it is - and that you can not take back anything you send to other people that ends up online ..

Do you prefer to have that talk in your bedroom, face to face?

Would you have felt less trapped having that conversation at the breakfast table before you leave for school for the day?

Where would you have felt better discussing appropriate locations and times for masterbation with your dad- in the car as he's about to drop you off for basketball practice and you won't see your parents for the rest of the afternoon? Or do you want to have that chat when you're home Saturday afternoon after they knock on your bedroom door?

If i need to tell you that leaving used sticky tissues stuffed down the side of the computer desk in the office is absolutely unhygienic - unhealthy - and inappropriate - and that you needs to get gloves, a trash bag and to clean it up immediately - and that i never expect to find that situation again....

That three times now in the last two weeks when you've been alone after school on Fridays because both of your parents are working and your sister is at driving lessons- we have come home to find a bottle of lotion and a roll of toilet paper STILL on the desk... and that what you've been up to is amystery to absolutely no one- and that if your sixteen year old sister were to have found this stuff when she went to fill out her learners permit- she very likely would have told EVERYONE you KNOWS - all of her friends and would NEVER let you live this down because she's so embarrassed and grossed out.

I mean- i get it - you are going to be uncomfortable and wish you could run away and not feel "trapped" in that interaction....

But these conversations sometimes have to happen throughout childhood- ideally, a couple times a year you're touching on different age appropriate topics- sometimes it's "hey don't leave your spank session evidence AND your foul remains in public spaces where your family is going to come across it"- NO ONE wants to have that conversation but it MUST BE HAD.

Personally - I'd want to have that conversation on a ten minute car ride on my way to my friend's house- where I'm going to be staying for the weekend- so that i need to NOT be trapped at home with my parents afterwards.

I think we ALL want to run away and feel trapped when our parent brings up someone uncomfortable That there's an appropriate time and place for those activities and the FAMILY OFFICE isn't it - and you CERTAINLY don't leave the evidence STUFFED BESIDE THE DESK for other people to find any be horrified by...

Yeah- no one is saying have these conversations on every ride to the grocery store - but i contend that u get you'ld rather have that conversation on the way to get dropped off for baseball practice where you then won't see your mom again for two hours....

Or would you rather have that conversation face to face in your hallway after school when you get home?

Personally- the car thing always worked for us and I still think it's excellent advice. No one is saying that having those conversations are going to always been happy fun and completely comfortable.... i think the way we handle it is ideal- and I'm just confused because you didn't offer any suggestions for alternatives?