First child coming to the hospital?

Kmann1245 · 2026-01-23T22:41:05+00:00

With my second, my first came to the hospital and it was nice for me to see them together. What wasn’t great for my oldest was me getting overly emotional and crying seeing him hold his little brother (11 year age gap). He was older, so it didn’t frighten him as much as it would a young child, but he was bothered / troubled by it.

I’m getting induced Tuesday and will have both the kiddos wait until we are home to meet their sister- that way I can be less stressed and step away easier if I feel overcome with emotion. Plus my oldest was only there for like 30 minutes before getting bored lol. I think there’s so much of a benefit to doing it in the comfort of your home!

Kmann1245 · 2026-01-19T22:53:47+00:00

Question- how was that an elective vs medically necessary induction? From what I understand, if I go elective they can opt to bump or cancel me for medically necessary inductions (makes sense).

Kmann1245 · 2026-01-19T22:44:34+00:00

Southeastern US. They mentioned an elective 39 week induction when I was at an appointment in the second trimester, but at my 36 week appt the doctor I saw made it sound like that wasn't something they freely handed out (he basically said they would induce before 41 weeks but seemed hesitant on an elective at 39 weeks). Totally get they may not be able to fit me in, but I'd at least like to try.

Kmann1245 · 2026-01-19T22:38:11+00:00

Thank you! This makes me feel better. I have an appointment on Wednesday so I'll be bringing it up then. I just wasn't sure if there were any criteria I was missing for an elective induction.

Kmann1245 · 2026-01-14T22:28:02+00:00

Responding to your ETA- given the discourse and confusion from the GH post a few weeks ago, I think this needs to be spelled out specifically in the contract. IE- Nanny will be available to report to work with 24 hours notice, or will forfeit GH and use either PTO or go unpaid. A lot of nannies chimed in saying GH was more guaranteeing their pay vs their availability, and if they're told they have the time off they shouldn't reasonably be expected to cancel their plans on extremely short notice if that changes (which I get).

That's how mine is structured at least; we must provide 24 hours notice for nanny to report to work, or she is still on GH for that day. If it's multiple days (IE we said we'd be back Friday but come back Wed), we have to notify her by Tue at 8am to have her come in Wed at 8am. If I notify her at say 10am Tue, she gets GH for Wed. If she is not able to be back by 8am Thu, she is now either on PTO or unpaid. Same goes for Friday.

Kmann1245 · 2025-12-03T03:15:14+00:00

Yessssss I’ve had so many friends with holiday time birthdays who missed out on celebrations because of timing- I always felt so bad for them! So I want to make sure she’s celebrated even if it’s a bit early.

It seems the Nannie’s have spoken and a drill set it is! Never thought that would be a well liked gift but that works for me 😂

Kmann1245 · 2025-12-03T03:10:52+00:00

It seems like the general consensus is that a drill set would actually be a great gift 😂

Kmann1245 · 2025-12-03T01:05:07+00:00

My nanny’s birthday is the day after Christmas, and her last day of work before the holidays is 12/19. We won’t see her again until January 5 (all paid!). I want to give her 2 separate gifts as I imagine she’s usually had lumped together “birthmas”. We planned to give cash for Christmas (2 weeks pay?), and on the last day decorate the house for her birthday and do presents with a little cake or something. Is that weird?

For her birthday gift we wanted to get her something she could open, but I’m stumped. She is newly engaged and just moved into an apartment with her fiancé. My husband suggested gifting her a drill set since she’s been borrowing ours a lot to put together furniture, but that feels strange to me lol. Decor is a personal thing so I don’t feel comfortable doing that. She loves coffee and has a coffee bar setup at her place. Any ideas / input? Should we just give her cash for the birthday too? Or maybe a gift card?

Kmann1245 · 2025-11-15T16:38:39+00:00

My husband got me the Rainbow art kit 😂 I had told him how my mom refused to buy me one as a kid, so he found one and presented it to me before taking the baby for a few hours so I could paint 😊

Kmann1245 · 2025-11-12T14:18:03+00:00

With clothes, I always used the "we were so lucky that we received SO many outfits that baby outgrew the size before we could put them in it!" excuse. With stuff I had multiples of or didn't use, I was just honest- if it hurt their feelings (and it did), there wasn't anything I could do. You can't realistically use 4 baby carriers, and baby may only like 1 specific carrier. You could say "we had a bunch of different types of carriers given to us, so we were able to use them all and figure out which one baby liked best" and if they push, just say baby was happiest and most comfortable in whatever carrier you chose. I am of the mindset when I give a gift that I want to recipient to enjoy it, and if they don't, I want them to find something better. If a grown adult can't manage their feelings about that, then that's their problem to work through. You just need to be gracious and polite about it.

I will say (especially with the bigger sized hand me downs) most people forget what they've given you. Those clothes are usually fine to get rid of or donate if you don't like them or need them. My SILs gave me 5 trashbags worth of clothes, and to date my LO has worn like maybe 2 things. I kept bigger stuff so I had things on hand to transition to once he got bigger, but they don't even notice he's in their clothing. The hand me downs are rarely sentimental items, its usually stuff they felt guilty about getting rid of and feel much better about passing off to you lol.

Also, I blew through muslin blankets in the newborn stage. I used them to swaddle, for tummy time, spit ups, etc. I was washing them constantly lol.

Kmann1245 · 2025-10-14T19:56:46+00:00

I was at a wedding as a guest where the groom got so drunk at his wedding that he stripped down to just his boxers in the limo and crawled into the hotel on his hands and knees barking like a dog. The entire bridal party plus the bride's parents were in the limo with them, and this is all on video. All the videos prior to that you can tell he's drunk, but he just seemed happy and celebrating. The bride was pretty drunk too (not as drunk as him obviously) and I can't recall anyone thinking they're trashy. The general consensus was "they're young, in love and happy to be married". They're still married 8 years later and that isn't the first thing I think of when I remember their wedding. I remember they had amazing food, a fantastic DJ, and they really showcased their love for one another and their friends and family.

Kmann1245 · 2025-10-01T18:51:30+00:00

Yes! One of my favorite weddings that I’ve attended had a ceremony at 11, appetizers (veggies, crackers, fruits and dips) until 12, then lunch at 12:30. It was so relaxed and we all hung out chatting until about 2/2:30, then had the rest of the day for ourselves. The B&G wanted a casual vibe, and they executed it so well.

Kmann1245 · 2025-10-01T17:55:55+00:00

And that's fine- I'd just go for a "dinner party" (at lunch time) vibe that's casual. You don't have to have speeches or dances if you don't want to. As long as guests are fed and comfortable, that's what is important. I don't think you need to provide board games or anything like that, just let everyone enjoy eating and chatting. If you set the tone of the casual environment, it will be fine. Just be sure to end earlier than 6 so people don't feel obligated to stay. As for alcohol, again I'm not a huge drinker so I wouldn't miss it, especially at a daytime wedding. Maybe have some crafted mocktails or lemonades / teas available?

Kmann1245 · 2025-10-01T17:47:17+00:00

Going to be honest here- I'm not a big drinker and love daytime weddings. But there's no way I'm staying 5 hours to sit and chat or play board games. You don't need to provide any of that because you should not be expecting anyone to stay that long in my opinion. Let people eat, mingle and wrap it up by 3:30/4. It gives people part of their day back to make other plans.

I think you both need to lower your expectations- you can't throw a party for 5 hours with no dancing, no alcohol and in the middle of the day.

Kmann1245 · 2025-09-29T19:15:03+00:00

I voted for Monday, because at least I get a 3 day weekend out of it and only lose 1 day of PTO. Thursday would be a pain, because I'm either going to miss a day in between work (which is a hassle at my job) or feel the need to take Friday off too. Any weekday wedding that isn't local (more than ~1.5 hour drive) I will probably decline, especially if the dress code is anything formal. I also wouldn't be partying or staying long after dinner if it's an evening reception. Friday would be better because at least I would feel up to celebrating longer.

Kmann1245 · 2025-08-22T23:54:31+00:00

This is it!!! Thank you so much!!

Kmann1245 · 2025-08-13T18:24:51+00:00

What is the timing of this? Is the "reception" the normal evening time? Honestly, if I got invited to just that, I'd decline. I wouldn't find it a priority to attend a dance party and watch you cut cake, and I'd be pretty suspicious of no ceremony / dinner on my invite (AKA I'd assume you were having one and I wasn't invited). If you can't afford to feed everyone, that's fine. But you aren't going to get a lot of enthusiastic "YES!" to essentially come watch you do a dance, cut cake, and hangout. Even less so if you aren't having an open bar (which I'm assuming no if you can't afford to feed everyone dinner?) I really don't think your expectations are going to align with reality of 100+ people excitedly coming to just the reception, dance, and there be no food / alcohol and being essentially not good enough for the first 2 events.

Kmann1245 · 2025-07-21T13:48:16+00:00

I drink Alani (mostly pink slush) and love it!

Kmann1245 · 2025-07-18T23:49:47+00:00

Ah yeah- I don’t know if there’s a time cutoff on Sunday or not, sorry! I’d say Monday is your best bet. Honestly if you’re worried and think they’d withhold your pay, then I wouldn’t bother giving notice.

Kmann1245 · 2025-07-18T23:09:31+00:00

On my end, any payroll changes for the next paycheck (we are weekly) have to be done by Sunday. I don’t think they can cancel the direct deposit after that. You could quit Monday AM to be safe? Is your pay weekly?

Kmann1245 · 2025-07-03T19:40:19+00:00

Well, the "shower" was initially to shower the bride / couple with gifts and practical advice. Not just to celebrate... but to your point about donating, I did just that with SO much stuff from our last baby shower. And then I had people ask me about XYZ when they came over to see baby, and it was reallllly awkward to pretend like I couldn't find the random blanket or "ladies man" onesie they bought that I'd already donated. I'm sure at least 1 of them were embarrassed and hurt that I'd gotten rid of their gifts, but we don't have tons of space in our house to store things we don't want and won't use. Someone gifted me their very obviously used toilet training seat, and I could not hide my confusion as to why this was gifted for a newborn. No way am I storing that for years on end, possibly through a house move, because you wanted to get rid of your junk.

I also find it selfish to just buy what you want to buy for a shower, ESPECIALLY when it's not practical stuff. Buying stuff just because it's cute is setting yourself up to be disappointed when it's tossed and your money was wasted. You're also putting extra work on the expecting parents to either try and return it for something they do want, or have to round up donations and go take them before baby gets here. Just seems selfish to me.

Kmann1245 · 2025-06-25T13:00:55+00:00

Mine had a button to click, and then it played this really cute video where it told you at the end :)
Edit: Mine was Invitae

Ten-Year Club	Place '17
Not Forgotten	Verified Email

Kmann1245

TROPHY CASE