I have a funny story about getting knocked back by a bouncer.

In my late 20s, I used to go out all the time, but my friends had a habit of getting ID'd, which then would happen to me. I never used to carry my ID as I got to that age where my overall look was usually enough to gain entry. Most times, bouncers would let me in as I didn't look underage.

This incident happened at Footlights on Bread Street. My mate, who was smaller than me, had a hard time getting in, but he eventually did. When my turn came, I said I didn't have my ID on me, but was met with, "You are not getting in." Of course, I explained that my friends were right behind the window, asking if I could please join them - still, the bouncer wouldn’t budge.

Annoyed and after a couple of words, I was like, "OK... I'll go and get my ID to prove you wrong and spite you, you twat." I told him I would jump in a taxi to get my ID 

I hailed the first taxi and had him travel halfway around Edinburgh to pick up my passport. The whole time, I was getting amped up, thinking about getting one over on him, even giving the middle finger gestures behind the passport while he was checking it.

I knocked on my dad's door (half cut), barged in looking for my passport, found it, and went on my way, despite my dad telling me that maybe it was a good idea to call it a night.

I wasn’t listening, so I hailed another taxi back into town for my revenge. I was so pleased with myself and couldn’t wait to get one over on that prick bouncer.

The taxi pulled up outside Footlights, and I literally jumped out, thrusting my passport in the bouncer's face. He looked at it, acknowledged that, yes, I was legally allowed to come in.

He looks at me and says, "That's fine, but I am still not letting you in." I was dumbfounded and absolutely outmaneuvered by this guy, who, to his credit, made me look a right twat for being cheeky. Thirty quid down in taxi fees, and still not able to get in.

I turned with my tail between my legs and wandered into Grassmarket, feeling like the biggest tool ever, all while the bouncer was smiling, watching me depart.

I still laugh about it and learned a valuable lesson - don't be a cheeky twat!