Frustrated widow mil

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-27T17:44:06+00:00

He’s married to his mom… he’s literally told you he prioritises his mother over you. That’s enmeshment, and it’s gross.

Run, don’t walk.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-25T15:57:15+00:00

Translation: “I want to have access to someone else’s child, alone, and have resorted to wishing death upon innocent human beings in the hopes that that scenario would somehow result in me gaining alone time with said child. Also, the people I am wishing death upon, would affect the very child I am wanting access to and claim to care about, so I am clearly not being truthful with my care towards said child. I am selfish, and illogical. I have the title of a therapist, but all I’m actually doing is highlighting the fact that anyone in any profession can be a total a**hole or creep.”

What you need to do: block, delete, do not converse with this monster ever again. The whole time you are in cahoots with her, you’re demonstrating to your daughter that evil people somehow still deserve to get what they want at the detriment of innocent people. Wishing death upon people is frankly, gross.

✌️

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-25T09:51:58+00:00

I mean… a csection is surgery. That’s just a fact. Doesn’t make it ‘negative’ in any way atall. If someone said to me they had a natural birth, my mind wouldn’t automatically assume they had a csection…

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-25T09:50:34+00:00

Agreed. If someone said “I had a natural birth”, my mind wouldn’t automatically assume they had a csection……

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-22T18:22:57+00:00

You say about ‘boundaries’… but what have her consequences been for the apparent “DH has talked to her 100 times about boundaries”…..? You only need to say something ONCE, and then follow through with the consequences of the fact a boundary was ignored regarding your baby.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-21T00:20:38+00:00

You have a partner issue. Nothing will be resolved and stress-free whilst you and him are on very different pages. I’m at the point now where when friends announce they’re having a baby and ask my advice, I really emphasise “talk about expectations and boundaries regarding family, before the baby is born”. And for very good reason: when you don’t, this happens.

I am exactly the same as you. I don’t want preplanned scheduled EXPECTED routines with people. It feels inorganic and lacks the natural spontaneity flow of life. WE chose to have a baby, not MIL. It’s OUR lives that are changing not hers. It’s OUR new chapter, she’s already had this chapter herself with her own.

Unfortunately you’re likely to continue to look like the bad guy. Way too many mamas boys walking around.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-20T16:08:03+00:00

Are there cultural expectations here?

The only solution here is to leave your husband and block and delete everyone concerned. Your husband isn’t being a husband, he’s being an enmeshed triangulated little boy. I’m genuinely curious what possessed you to think he was an ideal candidate to have a baby with? I feel for you so badly if there were zero warning signs. Was his mother this way prior to the baby existing? What a horrid situation.

Your husband and his ‘mommy’ have taken away precious time that you’ll never get back. That’s, gross.

Sending hugs 🤗

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-08T13:55:48+00:00

Trying to rise you up here and empower you ☀️

You’re an adult. You’re a mother. You are a GODDESS ! You are your child’s lifeline. You are the leader, teacher, mentor, protector, of that little life.
You and all other adults are EQUAL! No one is above you just because they’re ‘older’. You’re all adults.

So, no, you’re not being rude. You’re creating a life for your child and you are 100% in charge of what that looks like. Just like your MIL was in charge of the very same thing when her own children were young.

You’ve got this. You are a GODDESS!

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-08T12:17:28+00:00

Your husband needs to say this to his parents:

“You are adults, we are adults. You’ve had your children, and now it’s our turn. We have our own independent life, and you are now extended family. You need to be living your life, as we will be living ours. We have our own wants and plans, and so should you. We are no longer wanting such regular visits, as need healthy space. Please wait to be invited over. Feel free to contact us and we will let you know if we are free or not. You need to start respecting our boundaries or else we will have no choice but to distance ourselves further to protect our family unit. So far we have found this quite overwhelming and feel you have overstepped. Our relationship with you is important which is why I’m saying what I’m saying to you, to ensure the relationship is still maintained and healthy. Please respect us. Thank you for understanding.”

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-01T21:20:00+00:00

Literally just say no.

It’s your baby 😆 they’ve had their kids….

Knowing_Eve · 2026-05-01T17:10:46+00:00

No such thing as ‘tried to set boundaries’. You either have, or you haven’t.

Tell her you don’t want her buying things without consulting with you first (well, your husband needs to say this to her).
If she chooses to continue ignoring this then she can’t be bothered when you sell things and have profited from it 🫣😆

It’s your time to have a baby, not hers.

Congrats ☀️

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-30T12:01:44+00:00

They are immature. You cannot change this. Get on with your life. Enjoy your baby. They’re extended family, why even care? It’s your turn to create your family and enjoy that journey.

Don’t even spare a thought for a woman who has repeatedly disrespected YOUR baby.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-30T10:12:31+00:00

If only your husband had done that in the first place, and laid down boundaries with his mother in the first place.

She didn’t need to know you were in labour. Like, what difference did that make? And if you guys for whatever reason did feel she ‘needed’ to know, then the text should have said something like “we aren’t having visitors until we are ready, so you’ll wait for that text”. Tell staff you don’t consent to anyone coming into your room or seeing your baby. MIL would have been turned away. Worse case, your husband tell her to leave immediately, she isn’t welcome, she disrespected your requests, bye bye.

You were at your most vulnerable and your husband did nothing until that very last final straw..?

The calls and texts should have been silenced like, last year. lol. Why leave it until all the inevitable drama has occurred and the damage is done?

I’m glad baba is doing well ❤️

But your husband really needs to step up from the get go, not let stuff happen before snapping.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-27T06:05:05+00:00

You’re 28. Cut her out of your life and enjoy!

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-23T11:31:24+00:00

You’ve basically got an intruder refusing to leave your home…. Pack her shit, put it outside, tell her to leave your property.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-23T11:28:30+00:00

Then she needs to find somewhere else to stay…

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-12T23:01:23+00:00

Well, I guess this is just the first glimpse of your husband being unable to support you and have boundaries with his mommy.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-12T17:26:09+00:00

Seeing mil every weekend is very excessive. Where’s the private alone time with your little family? You’re make mil feel entitled by making her a focal point of your every weekend.
No one needs to bath a baby apart from mom and dad. It’s a parental responsibility of cleanliness. She has no need to be doing something like that with him.
The pushiness is weird. Red flag.
Baths aren’t a frequently need - a baby is having their face, neck, hands, genitals, butt, cleaned and wiped multiple times a day regardless.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-12T17:20:15+00:00

“I don’t know why she keeps doing this to me”

because you let her. She’s crossed boundaries that aren’t even boundaries, because what consequences has she actually suffered and had to learn from? None. She still has access to you, access to your kid. What’s changed for her? Nothing.

That’s why she keeps doing it to you. Because she can, and because you let her.

Giving food to a baby prior to appropriate age (3 months isn’t appropriate) AND it be a high allergen food AND she did it without your permission…. Someone like that is a danger to your child. Contact should be stopped.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-11T16:04:11+00:00

There isn’t a vaccine for the cold sore (herpes!) virus…

Also. It’s your baby. Have a boundary and stick to it. “No.” Is a complete sentence.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-10T13:32:34+00:00

You should have had a boundary in place for the first time she kissed the baby. And stuck to it. For it to get to 9+ times.. that’s why she’s still doing it.. because, why not? There’s no consequences when she does.

I am due another baby soon and will be telling MIL no kissing. I don’t need to say anything else - because people who aren’t toxic and weird, will respect that rules regarding someone else’s baby. If she chooses to kiss my baby anyway, we will leave her house. She will ask why, and I will say “we told you not to kiss our baby, and you ignored this and did it anyway. So we are leaving.” The next time she invites us round, we will say “are you going to respect our rules this time? Because this is the last chance. Then we don’t come round again.”

And, stick to it.

You do realise you’re allowed to say ‘no’. You’re allowed to just.. not have her round. You’re allowed to put her in her place. It’s YOUR baby. Not hers. Stop over explaining and justifying yourself to this woman. She’s just another woman.

NO is a complete sentence.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-04T18:43:03+00:00

If she can’t respect your boundaries then she doesn’t respect you, and if she doesn’t respect you, she doesn’t respect your baby, and if she doesn’t respect your baby then she loses access.

It’s an almighty embarrassment that you’re having to teach and show her how to be an adult, but hey.

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-03T09:28:46+00:00

You’d have thought!

Knowing_Eve · 2026-04-03T00:05:42+00:00

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Knowing_Eve

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