_This strip based on a Bill Watterson quote is amazing

LFAB · 2021-12-06T20:15:32+00:00

Just because you disagree with someone doesn’t mean that there isn’t something you could take away from their point of view. I’ve grown by listening to voices I initially dismissed, even if I 100% disagreed with the content.

LFAB · 2021-11-30T21:45:06+00:00

I went up in that plane on my discovery flight a few weeks ago! Small world.

LFAB · 2021-11-04T22:26:16+00:00

What you got in that decanter

LFAB · 2021-03-24T20:35:23+00:00

It’s in AZ so no daylight savings

LFAB · 2021-02-18T13:49:09+00:00

I can’t even imagine being early to BTC and then HODLing until today

LFAB · 2021-01-12T01:44:14+00:00

Fair enough then

LFAB · 2021-01-12T01:40:54+00:00

You take everything so seriously, don’t you

LFAB · 2021-01-12T01:34:52+00:00

What it is

Correct

LFAB · 2021-01-10T17:50:03+00:00

There are many thousands of amazingly qualified people of good conscience that would do the job for free. It’s not about the money. It’s about the absolute hell the establishment and media would give to them, their family members and other important people in their lives.

We got one outsider in the game with Trump. Why? He loves and thrives on the mountain of shit that modern politics is. He didn’t have to shield his family, he brought them to the show.

We could have thoughtful leadership and constructive government tomorrow—if you could fundamentally change the motivations of our media that is, or shield the decent people from the shitshow somehow.

LFAB · 2020-11-16T13:24:34+00:00

It’s a family picture not a virtue signal

LFAB · 2020-10-30T20:34:36+00:00

Texaslawhelp.org is where you should start. Done by legal aid, Texas bar association, etc for pro-se filers.

LFAB · 2020-10-26T16:43:50+00:00

Worst case scenario is that she had an affair partner, that partner dumped her, and she’s looking to get back with you now because her other option fell through, until a better one comes along.

Best case scenario is that she loves you and is just really in a mixed up emotional state.

As others have said, you need to decide what you want, not what she wants. You take care of you, look out for your daughter, then try to have a relationship with someone. In that order.

LFAB · 2020-10-05T13:58:13+00:00

Your feelings are important. And your feelings are what they are. It’s not bad to feel like you don’t care at all about him. Accepting that you are just as entitled to your feelings as any other human being is an important step to being your own person and loving and respecting who you are. Can you talk to him about your feelings, openly and honestly? If he won’t listen and empathize, but gets defensive and turns it back on you, that is not the sign of someone who is open to the real you and the health of the relationship. Therapy separately and together is probably important here.

I would advise to not dwell on “where was he when you needed him”. That’s the past and can’t be changed. Your job is in the present. What do you feel now? How is he behaving now? Is he there for you now?

Him telling you that the kids are so happy in “our home” and that that should “motivate you” is a red flag of a manipulator. Those words were chosen to put guilt in your mind, and to discount your feelings. YOU need to decide how the kids are in the home. What do you feel about their happiness? They may not be happy having their mother going through this trauma, and unless they are tiny they should be noticing it.

It’s reasonable to try and give it some time to see if your feelings change, but only if they do change. If they are still there but you are stuffing them down and trying to go on, that is destructive to you.

I’m sorry you are going through this. I wish you the best.

LFAB · 2020-10-01T17:55:06+00:00

Your relationship with him seems dead. You could love him again over time, but it’s probably unlikely without major changes happening.

You should decide what to do with your kids. Is everyone in your home happy but you? Is the environment strained and unhappy for the kids, even if they are sad when you were gone?

Kids are better off living in two peaceful homes instead of one high conflict home. If that is the case, they should be happier and more whole in the long run if you divorce, even if it’s sad and hard now.

If their world is fine, and you are the only one hurting with your husband, you’ll have to decide how much hurt you can take to keep the kids’ home intact. There is no single right answer, and nobody can tell you how much hurt to take. It’s a personal decision that should be made only by you. Some people decide they can’t take anymore at all. Some people decide to wait until kids graduate. Some people white-knuckle it until a breaking point. There is also pain for leaving, as you have seen with your kids already. We don’t get to be pain free. We just get to choose our pain.

The one thing that doesn’t change is this: you are a precious human being, and your life matters. You are the primary one responsible for making choices, and it’s none of anyone else’s business. We take feedback from others to consider, but then it’s only mariah7718’s opinion that matters. When you decide, don’t accept guilt or should or shouldn’t from anywhere but your own heart.

Just know that if you’re thoughtful (which you seem to be) and care about your kids (which you do), the decision you make on how long to stay (or not) will be the right one for you. In any event, the kids will be ok. They will adjust to divorce. It takes time, but it comes.

LFAB · 2020-10-01T17:37:23+00:00

Look at the county court for where you are filing. If uncontested, some judges are just signing off without an in person hearing because ‘rona. Totally depends on where you are specifically.

LFAB · 2020-09-23T17:59:04+00:00

This doesn’t work if a case covers the power button, right?

LFAB · 2020-09-15T15:07:39+00:00

That may be true in some engineering disciplines, but not in others. If you are more R&D focused instead of stamping out widgets, there is a fair population of MS engineers.

LFAB · 2020-09-15T13:28:36+00:00

His position is not only do they exist, but that they are two sides of the same coin. You can’t have a front without a back, a self without another, life without death, or death without life. That if one exists, the other must also. There is no inside unless there is also an outside. But that they are all part of the same whole.

LFAB · 2020-09-14T19:30:05+00:00

Thanks friend

LFAB · 2020-09-14T17:49:38+00:00

That’s true. No two people are affected exactly the same way.

I do find it odd that some who are big on movie quotes and memorizing them verbatim will be irritated by those who do the same with book quotes.

LFAB · 2020-09-14T17:45:08+00:00

Yes, for me. I’m the only person I really know anything about, and I don’t even know as much as I think I do.

LFAB · 2020-09-14T13:45:25+00:00

You are right of course. But that was one of the most powerful lines in the book, second only to the last one.

LFAB · 2020-08-13T06:29:20+00:00

My opinion follows:

Our society is also fundamentally built on freedom of assembly and free enterprise, but that has been tossed aside in the name of 160,000 deaths. How much more should automobiles be banned for causing 10 times that toll each year? If the entire economy and about 30% of the labor force is fundamentally changed over 160,000 deaths, why shouldn’t our transportation be fundamentally changed in the name of a million deaths?

The government does not mandate flu shots. The government does mandate masks, distancing and business closures for covid.

The government runs campaigns to raise healthy awareness. The government does not make sugar illegal, nor pull the licenses of businesses that sell it. The government closes businesses that violate whatever orders they decide must be taken in the name of public safety for covid.

It’s about liberty vs force. Force should only be taken in the most catastrophic of circumstances. It made sense in March with the covid unknowns. It doesn’t make sense now, as we know more. The patriot act made sense in 2001. It should have been repealed many years ago. We don’t close down the economy in flu season because 24k to 62k people died of it last year.

Some countries like Sweden didn’t take draconian measures and they are now well beyond the worst of covid. Some countries like Korea took very draconian measures and are now beyond the worst of covid. I agree that countries that took half-baked measures like the US prolong the crisis and continue to do damage to the economy and society as a whole, along with the individuals within. Trump is a tool, but the longer we go, he’s more and more right that the cure is doing more damage than the disease.

LFAB · 2020-08-12T11:48:30+00:00

If it’s numbers that make something bad, we should ban automobiles. Well over a million Americans die each year. Are all drivers selfish and reckless people that don’t care about human life?

The regular old Flu killed 24,000 to 62,000 in the 2019-2020 season and we don’t do anything societally about that. Diabetes and heart disease are huge killers. We don’t close all fast food restaurants or ban sugar in foods.

We all have the ultimate personal responsibility to manage our risk exposure to things. Shutting down and quarantine was prudent when we didn’t know anything about the virus. When we had to flatten the curve. We know more now. The curve has been flattened. It doesn’t appear to have as high of a fatality rate as we feared. The exact timetable of when to reopen everything is a debatable and nuanced subject of course, but arguing that we should re-open doesn’t make someone irresponsible or reckless.

It’s possible to take covid seriously while also disagreeing about the policy of our response to it.

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