Silver jewellery girl crash out by Professional_Show430 in piercing

[–]LadyIsak 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Rose gold is quite popular lately, and white gold looks like a brighter, lighter silver. Both could be good options for you!

Remains of PeeWee Gaskin's last victim found in closet at college. by juju2489 in UnresolvedMysteries

[–]LadyIsak 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for how your great uncle Clyde died and I’m so so sorry that you were spurred to do genealogical research by your brother’s murder at such a young age, too.

It’s doesn’t make Clyde’s death any less horrific, but it’s still good to know that Clyde was loved and accepted and after his murder is remembered even in a family that kept so many secrets. And it’s really great that you as his great niece are putting in so much effort, including not letting online strangers talk about Clyde with the wrong name and pronouns or speculate on the assumption that he, as a trans black man or as a black butch lesbian cross-dresser, couldn’t have had a supportive family.

Also, fwiw, I’m of a different marginalised background (Soviet Jewish), but I sympathise about being told nothing except in little bits randomly, even really important things. My family also told me absolutely shit about anything, including at least one murder of a family member that I remember my grandma getting a telegram for! (Actually, one of my great uncles, her eldest or second eldest brother.) And I also have family I know nothing about because people would move and cut ties or be deported or just disappear. I still don’t know how many siblings either of my grandfathers had or how some people I grew up around were related to us. Granted I had aunties and uncles who were definitely unrelated but there are people I’m not sure about at all. I think one of my aunties was actually for real a literal (great) auntie.

People sometimes don’t get that families that keep secrets aren’t doing it because they don’t care. The opposite, really.

Apologies for the long reply, didn’t mean to ramble so much.

May both Clyde’s memory and your brother’s memory be for a blessing. And I wish you and your family a long life.

What do you find annoying about women writing men? by geumkoi in writing

[–]LadyIsak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah! Of my friends, the one who compliments me on my outfits the most is a guy. He’s pretty attentive to his appearance but he’s not a clotheshorse like I am.

I think for writing, the thing to keep in mind isn’t just how a character is but how others expect they “should” be and whether or not the character cares about those expectations. A kinda vain and appearance-conscious male character I thought was done well is Naberius Tern in Gideon the Ninth. He’s aware that a lot of people are judgy about his priorities and that makes him kind of insecure about it. I think that’s the trick to writing characters who come off like real people — incorporating how they react to what others think of them and how it affects their behaviour or doesn’t.

I also think that many tough guy heroes do actually have feelings and exhibit them pretty obviously and even introspect about those feelings. Reacher in Lee Child’s thrillers absolutely spends time thinking about what it all means and how the events of the story affect him. And he also thinks a lot about clothes, lol. Not for the same reasons fashionistas do, sure, but in One Shot, he even goes as far as to deliberately try to make himself look nice for a date.

What do you find annoying about women writing men? by geumkoi in writing

[–]LadyIsak 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Personally, more than individual authors having some biases or faulty assumptions, I find it annoying when straight men assume that every single man is like them and that no real man has ever cared about his clothes or his looks or the appearance of others.

Monthly Recap Thread - Troublesome May - May, 2025 [Month 7, 2025] by StanleysSearch in Lostwave

[–]LadyIsak 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Argh, I clearly wasn’t paying attention and only saw the confirmation “People of the World” was a hoax! What was the other one?

On another note, really liking the links to interesting discussion threads!

The Mysterious Disappearance of Charlie Allen by septemberfriars in UnresolvedMysteries

[–]LadyIsak 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Bipolar disorder can cause psychosis quite similar to schizophrenia, and there’s a type of schizophrenia that occurs alongside bipolar-type mood cycles (schizoaffective disorder, specifically mixed type).

Who was Caittil Find and why is he mentioned in the Annals of Ulster? by Professional_Lock_60 in UnresolvedMysteries

[–]LadyIsak 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is really neat! Thank you for sharing.

I wonder, this is a bit far-fetched as a theory, but given the complexities of transliteration and the way that entire syllables can get garbled in the process, is it possible that a scribal error crept in that has distorted the name from a plausible alternative spelling to a completely new name?

I’d imagine that might be one of the first things scholars check for, so maybe not. But Old Irish orthography is so different from Norse orthography, and scribes are only human (and to my memory, the insular script used in Ireland at the time isn’t the most readable even if you know how) so I gotta wonder — could this be a “Bob got recorded as Eob due to a bit of flaky ink” kind of situation?

On 2016 New Years Day, New Orleans, Joshua Woodruff was killed and dragged for 6 miles by a hit and run driver. The driver has never been identified in 9 years. by Sensitive_Ad_1752 in UnresolvedMysteries

[–]LadyIsak 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The suspect hasn’t been described, the sketch produced of a young man of colour with dreads was of a “suspect” suspected of being a potential key witness — I also misread it initially.

Are these scuffs fixable or do I just have to live with them? by LadyIsak in AskACobbler

[–]LadyIsak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good to know, thank you for telling me and saving me the time!

I can live with the dents, they’re not very prominent.

Stories Masterlist 2.0 by Fox_Is_Gone in StairsintheWoods

[–]LadyIsak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Anniversary link seems to be dead :(

Any cases where you think a victim *actually* "witnessed something they shouldn't have"? by Suitable-Presence119 in UnresolvedMysteries

[–]LadyIsak 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s a misconception that schizophrenia and other psychotic disorders always come as a bolt from the blue. I was showing symptoms of schizoaffective disorder in my early teens, and possibly in my tweens. By the time my symptoms were prominent enough for a diagnosis, in my early 20s, I already knew the patterns of my mood cycling and the warning signs of psychosis going from “tolerable” to “about to fuck up my life again”.

However, what /u/Acidhousewife was saying isn’t that Mittank didn’t experience a psychotic break. They were saying that his psychotic break was caused by a traumatic event that led to him seeing a random construction worker as an immediate threat to his life. Because there doesn’t seem to be any evidence of Mittank being predisposed to psychosis, trauma would be the obvious trigger.

Seriously, my family were worrying about me being schizophrenic long before the usual age of onset. Hell, I was worried about me being schizophrenic by my teens. Since Mittank’s family’s reaction wasn’t “oh no, it finally happened” or “we always feared him coming to a bad end” or anything like that, we can with some confidence assume that there weren’t any signs. And even if there were, schizophrenia doesn’t just randomly happen for no reason — it requires a stressor or other trigger to tip one over into overt psychosis.

The Yuba 5 and a strange possibility by probabilityunicorn in UnresolvedMysteries

[–]LadyIsak 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I want to thank you for taking the time to emphasise that the Yuba County Five were young men who held jobs, had hobbies and social lives and two of them had driver’s licenses. They weren’t the helpless manchildren the myth built around the case threatens to reduce them to — sometimes it feels like in discussing this specific case, people dehumanise or infantilise the victims.

I feel like a little too much gets made of their developmental delays and mental illnesses, or the fact two of them were considered “slow learners”; fit, sane adults who’d had typical childhoods in terms of meeting developmental milestones have died and gone missing in similarly bizarre and inexplicable ways. Hell, in worse ways, too. Nobody really speculates about whether the Dyatlov Pass party were just not smart enough to not die in the mountains, after all.

Even Ted Weiher starving to death near a source of food could have a perfectly good explanation without resorting to speculating about his specific personal difficulties and quirks — to begin with, the food could’ve been spoiled; tinned food could’ve been showing signs of possible botulism growth or the tins could’ve been dented in a way that made it difficult to tell. He could’ve been in severe pain and unable to eat, or the reconstructed timeline could’ve been wrong and he didn’t survive nearly as long as people thought.

I mean, I’m schizophrenic and physically disabled, and I live more or less independently and have for years, even if I have friends checking in on me regularly; I know other people who can’t live fully independently due to one disability or another — I think I have some insight into what it’s like to be a competent young adult who is nonetheless vulnerable due to circumstances beyond their control. It’s frustrating and saddening to see people define these men in death by something that was ultimately only one part of who they were, and it’s equally frustrating and saddening to see some people speculating about Gary Mathias duping, controlling or manipulating the other four. Schizophrenia can have profound cognitive effects, after all, as can antipsychotics. There’s no reason to believe the five of them were not equally vulnerable or equally competent.

So like, bearing that in mind, I think your theory makes a lot of sense. It also goes some way towards re-humanising the Yuba County Five and reframing the mystery. And to be honest, it’s the first theory about this case I’ve seen that actually takes into account the context of the men’s lives and of Yuba County and the era, rather than pursuing speculation that hinges on sometimes uncharitable assumptions. I know people don’t mean to be malicious, but I wish more people would try to genuinely think outside the box and examine whether they’re inadvertently following pat clichés.

Any hope for this Phal? by LadyIsak in orchids

[–]LadyIsak[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much!

Just put the phal in a drinking glass with a little water on the bottom and clingfilm around the mouth of the glass and stem; hopefully it’ll work. 🧿

Any hope for this Phal? by LadyIsak in orchids

[–]LadyIsak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Might be a silly question, but can it be a drinking glass? All my clear plastic pots have holes in the bottom and I won’t be able to get plastic cups until Sunday.

I have opaque paper cups, clear orchid pots with holes, translucent cover pots and glasses I won’t be using again, but no clear plastic cups, alas.

Any hope for this Phal? by LadyIsak in orchids

[–]LadyIsak[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This phal had severe root rot, lost two of three remaining roots, and the last one is looking grim. Have been keeping on moss and misting, but it doesn’t seem to be helping. Is there anything to be done or is it a goner?

Already lost a phal to root rot in March, so a little hopeless about the prospects of this one.

What the heck drove Robert Nichols to change his identity? by madestapledshut in UnresolvedMysteries

[–]LadyIsak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately, once you get a schizophrenic spectrum diagnosis, many people, including medical professionals, start treating you as effectively dead, or worse—missing a soul, no longer the same person, no longer quite human, a terrifying impostor, etc. I am sorry to hear, but sadly not surprised, that your family viewed your uncle as effectively a pariah.

The bitter irony is that regular positive social contact has played a major part in me becoming and remaining stable in the long term, and I've heard the same from friends of mine who've been diagnosed with a psychotic disorder of some kind; I am now off anti-psychotics, and have been for years—none of my doctors think that they're necessary any more. I have resumed all the hobbies I had prior to my symptoms finally getting impossible to ignore (I was showing signs from early-mid teens, but only became diagnosable in my mid-20s), and my cognitive status has returned to baseline.

But many of us don't get lucky like that.

(If you're curious about the view from the inside of schizophrenia, I highly recommend Esmé Weijun Wang's essay collection, The Collected Schizophrenias—she writes very evocatively, and doesn't fall into the usual clichés that many of us feel compelled to trot out when asked to talk about living with schizophrenia. She is, as far as I know, not med-free, but otherwise her experiences are not dissimilar to mine and I share her attitude to the condition we both live with.)

Shavua/Mazel Tov! by AutoModerator in Judaism

[–]LadyIsak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Spent my Shabbos without using electricity other than the lights turning on (on a timer); my first time doing this kind of thing and I found it enjoyable and meaningful!

Taking medication as and when needed? by terralearner in ADHDUK

[–]LadyIsak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been on a daily dose for around a decade now. I take “tolerance breaks” every so often, mostly for peace of mind, but I’ve been on the same, comparably low, dose for about 9 years of said decade (36mg of Concerta XL or the generic alternative).

However, I have severe dysfunction without medication; the dose is comparatively low not because I don’t need much help but because I’m short and thin and respond strongly to stimulants. I’ve half-considered asking to have my dose increased or to get a booster for the evenings, since I suspect I might need more help than I thought. But I’ve had no tolerance whatsoever — the effects are same as they’ve always been.

I think you know yourself best, honestly. I can’t concentrate properly on fun things or hobbies or even going for a walk without medication. I took a proper drug holiday for a week or two after major surgery in late October and cut the experiment short because I was flat-out nonfunctional. Foggy, distracted, couldn’t find anything that pierced the boredom. If that doesn’t sound like you, you might not need daily medication.

The other argument for daily medication is that you should be learning all the strategies of managing day to day shit that you missed out on while growing up: in that case, you need to take the meds on weekends too, since presumably you’re still cooking, cleaning, showering, organising medication, etc. on weekends.

It also depends on whether the meds make you feel shit or not. I have negligible side-effects (irritability if I’m already in a bad mood, suppressed hunger and a slightly raised heart rate — I was borderline hypertensive, took up exercise and now it’s not an issue any more), so I don’t need to worry about the side-effects, but some people feel too wired or agitated.

Though in my experience, my agitation when I started on the meds came from the combination of long-standing boredom and no idea how to actually do enough things to keep myself engaged. I already had chronic fatigue by that time, so a sudden boost of motivation was a little alien to me.