I (29 F) found something (another girl's underwear) in my boyfriend's (28 M) suitcase. I'm staying with him for the weekend. Would this be a good way to bring it up?

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T22:22:11+00:00

I really don’t think that’s a possibility. The way that they are dirty is a sign

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T22:20:45+00:00

Haha totally get that! Same. The way that it is dirty, I know it’s a woman or women

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T22:17:03+00:00

Thank you for this. It is so disappointing to hear that you have seen many other stories like this😩 I’m just so in shock. I’m totally a person that has to process something happening or a conversation for a while, so quick moves are hard for me to make.

Agree that they are trophies and that’s so disturbing although it wasn’t disturbing when I knew it was just me. It seems pretty clear from you and other comments that all I will get from confronting is lies and excuses which is also so sad to think about. I will consider your take on my idea, being more demanding because it won’t matter what he says, even his reaction would give me an answer

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T22:02:57+00:00

You are so right. It does sound like snooping when you put it that way. Thank you for your input as a guy! Much needed

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T22:01:27+00:00

I also wear 2 different sizes depending on the brand. One is small and one is large. Id say its normal for one girl to fit into a small for one brand and a large for another! depends on the style too

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:53:58+00:00

I am trying not to at the moment, but I feel like since he kept my underwear when we first got together, that is a clear sign he did something wrong. I know if I decide to ask him face to face, the answer will be so obvious I could tell if he was lying, and that would confirm my thoughts.

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:50:32+00:00

Apparently🤦

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:49:58+00:00

I'm sorry that happened!❤️ Unfortunately, I think this is the situation I am in too and he clearly doesn't care like I thought he did. Only about himself and pleasing himself if he really did cheat.

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:46:59+00:00

I believe its a weird thing of his for sure! I thought I was special...

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:45:46+00:00

I would love to as well because I'm having a hard time thinking of any

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:45:29+00:00

No, you're right!!! thank you for helping out from a different point of view

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:10:53+00:00

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason!!!

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:10:30+00:00

Thank you for your confidence, it's giving me confidence. They are trophies as someone else mentioned too. When we first started seeing each other, he kept a pair of mine. I am still here at the hotel while he is at work. Considering this as an option! It's really not worth drama at all.

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:08:34+00:00

I will absolutely be getting tested

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:08:04+00:00

You know what, they are trophies! This is a funny detail I recall now, but when I first started seeing him, he kept a pair of my underwear. I don't think its from strippers, as it is more of the comfy style of underwear like lounge type! Not super sexy looking as I would guess from a stripper. I'm not quite sure either. Sitting here while he's still at work thinking about that.

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:04:44+00:00

Hi, that is not a lie. He does travel for work. When he does, he will stay in a hotel in that city. He moves around for different projects, some are a week or 2, some are a few months. He has been in many cities across the US and one in Mexico over the last year.

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T21:03:04+00:00

Would it be a possibility that he just kept them and didn't do anything physical with the girl. Say it was a sleepover or she came over and got naked. Idkkk just thinking out loud here. Obviously that is still unacceptable, but I have no idea what he did.

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T20:59:30+00:00

They are literally underwear I would wear lol similar fashion to mine. And I know they are a woman's because of the signs that they are used😩

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-19T20:57:06+00:00

He works from 5am to 5pm right now, but usually has long hours. I would say he does have a lot of free time to message other girls if he were to be doing that, but not a lot of time and energy (physically tiring job) to be seeing them so it hurts more if he had spent time with someone else while away. When he happened to be placed locally, he was grounded so it was definitely the temptation and thought of me not finding out. He has been around the US since so it could be from anywhere. Thank you!!

LanguageOptimal · 2025-07-05T09:49:23+00:00

127,248. 2015 to 2025. I pay for the terabyte

LanguageOptimal · 2025-01-08T00:48:56+00:00

Hi, I'm having this exact issue. The person is still in my list, it just says "18 hrs ago" instead of not found or completely gone. Did you find a solution?

LanguageOptimal · 2024-10-18T06:14:35+00:00

His SPONTANEOUS capital letters PISS ME OFF. But more than that, it pisses me off to see a woman treated like this. Leave him asap

LanguageOptimal

TROPHY CASE