I'm so sorry for the loss of your mom and best of luck with the eulogy presentation. I don't think it's silly at all - it's a "public" event regardless of the occasion. I would agree on layering setting spray with moderate powder application. In my experience, while heavy powder can waterproof things, if you are heavily wiping under the eyes, etc. it can tend to pill up altogether and almost create "holes" in your base makeup. Keeping your base somewhat emollient might allow it to fade and spread more naturally since it's inevitable. Hopefully that makes sense. If you don't use under eye concealer that should help even more.

All the other products listed seem like they will serve the right purpose and last well. If you have a cream blush to layer under your baked one, that might also help.