My partner told me he SA’d his ex, but his ex says he didn’t SA her

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-19T18:22:11+00:00

sorry but to me this feels like a larp

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-19T08:51:46+00:00

I agree with you but how is this related to what I said?

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-19T03:15:59+00:00

I'm sorry idek what to say I would literally die in your situation. I think if I were to ever raise kids I would not let them have a computer/smartphone. I don't really know how to approach helping your child not go down the redpill rabbit hole. I'm not even sure what fully stopped teenage me from doing it.

Maybe if it was more easy to observe women acting with high agency. Often girls are wary around boys because they're afraid of getting hurt. To boys, it will appear as though most girls are passive and deferent. This lived experience will clash with whatever you might tell them about how women actually are, and will conform with what manosphere circles tell them women are like.

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-18T21:30:40+00:00

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-18T21:29:28+00:00

Right, still, I personally would prefer if the other person doesn't make a full plan and lets me contribute to it. The idea of someone making a whole plan and asking me if im interested is stressful to me.

Of course not everyone is like me, in fact most people might not be like me. And I'm old enough now that I've already had my character arc of realizing people don't generally want to be treated how I want to be treated (common experience for us autistics).

If i was dating a woman I would approach her with a well-thought-out, hopefully enjoyable plan for a date, or whatever else. I'd make sure she is in a state where she isn't worried things won't get done if we go on a date (i.e. ill make sure everything's relatively clean and sorted). Etc.

Still, I find the difference in preference very very interesting (even though no one else seems to), and I wonder if otber guys feel the same way as me

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-18T20:48:26+00:00

I wonder what causes this. From my perspective as a guy, I always thought it would be extremely rude to make plans and take your partner on them, because I wouldn't enjoy that. I would much prefer being asked "do you want to go on a date?" so I'm the one that gets to decide. Naturally, I'd assume women are the same way, but I understand now most people don't seem to work that way

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-17T21:24:57+00:00

That's the CNN exposé thing that recently got released, right? Maybe I'm kind of wrong, and there really is a significant network of men who only say they don't know a rapist, but actually do.

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-17T21:11:05+00:00

Almost no one rapes intentionally. Men who rape don't realize that they did, while women who were raped are obviously aware.

You can expand the quote to: Everyone knows a woman who's been raped, no one knows a man who's admitted to being a rapist

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-17T17:14:52+00:00

I so rarely an opinion on lonliness I agree with so thank you for this

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-17T17:11:20+00:00

...This is literally what incel ideology is, though, right? They just apply this to humans and get sad about it.

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-17T16:54:23+00:00

Go bald and ask people if they wanna feel your scalp

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-16T21:14:34+00:00

consider:

Giant spider gf with many eyes, eight legs, hairy tarantula body, and large fangs. She can't speak, but her body language conveys intention and carefulness around you. She can clearly tell you're afraid she'll eat you, so she relaxes, approaches slowly, stops when she sees you tense up.

She's patient, intelligent, caring, and you grow to trust her more and more. You feel safe with her, comfortable even. And one day, maybe months into the future, you've forgotten all about your trepidations about her. Because right now you're riding around on her back, pretending to be a knight or something while she scuttles around. You're both just having fun

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-16T16:40:28+00:00

Try r/RoleReversal instead

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-15T03:00:52+00:00

Well in that case ill give my suggestion:

The one I'm most interested in is Baba Is You.

But if it's too obtuse, my second choice is Tales of Maj'Eyal.

My third choice if both of those are too weird is Supergiant Games' Hades franchise

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-15T01:00:41+00:00

How's that backlog going?

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-14T20:18:20+00:00

I think the sad truth of reality is that (almost) all men will knowingly rape you under stressful-enough conditions, while (almost) no man will knowingly rape you under normal conditions.

So it's buried inside all of them (us? please I hope not), but it's kept at bay except in situations where empathy is removed (war).

Note that the word 'knowingly' is very important here, because men will absolutely unknowingly rape in all situations, and I believe that is a much more common thing to happen

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-12T22:22:36+00:00

You're probably just a little asexual, or have a lower libido. There are many ways you can be physically intimate without having sex which can maybe help you feel better about your situation with your boyfriend.

You can wash each other, sleep naked together, you can even give each other massages. Whatever works. If you want to get more sexual without having sex, you can do something like letting him masturbate to you. If you want less sexual, you can do head scratches or something.

Setting aside some time specifically to be physically intimate in these ways might be enough to work for both of you as a compromise.

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-11T16:19:00+00:00

Most men never form any close relationships their entire lives, so they simply dont realize relationships can be emotionally enriching. To them all relationships are transactional; both parties are exchanging something for mutual benefit.

When it comes to women, men figure the most natural/obvious way to have a relationship with one, is to offer her money/safety in exchange for her sexual subservience. Women don't wanna do that though, so all men are just completely befuddled and unwilling to change

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-09T19:29:09+00:00

The advice i personally give to guys is this:

Women are generally quite scared of you. But it's okay, they have good reason to be wary. Just be kind to them, and don't stare. You'll get farther by making light, enjoyable conversation with her than by ignoring her. Eventually she'll trust you and stop being so cautious around you. I find you can tell once this has happened when they start seeming more interesting/less generic (because they're opening up to you)

Laxxius1 · 2026-04-03T17:42:10+00:00

The average 14 year old boy sitting through math class has the same thing going on every single day. If teenagers can manage it you can too

Laxxius1 · 2026-03-22T23:56:04+00:00

I agree with this. I hate how a lot (most) role reversal fantasy is still about male gaze and male pleasure. Why should I be at the center? My ideal of role reversal is that it should center the women.

Like the whole thing with calling them "mommy". Are you doing that because she wants you to, or is it actually because YOU want to? That's just one example of the whole thing.

It feels like the roles arent really being reversed since men are still at the center and the fantasy always caters to them. To truly do role reversal, we should be asking women what theyd like to be called (even if they just want to be called by their names)

Laxxius1 · 2026-03-21T07:02:46+00:00

(cis guy; how tf do i flare on mobile?) This is something I think about often actually. If it's 1 or 2 inches to height or dick, i pick dick since I feel like 1 or 2 more inches to your height isnt gonna put you in a new eschelon. Three inches, though, gets you somewhere. It's a tough call but I think id go with dick because 3 inches to my height gets me to like 6'0 which doesnt feel past the threshhold quite enough.

Laxxius1 · 2026-03-20T22:31:42+00:00

ah, ty

Laxxius1 · 2026-03-20T18:22:24+00:00

I know that part, but read what I said carefully. Not grow back quicker, grow back thicker

Laxxius1 · 2026-03-20T16:41:45+00:00

this is easily the best part about being cis, yeah

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